Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

don't think so, its just a weekend, which is usually a slow time around here http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif So pull up a chair and have a brewski, some tribble wings, a FBW clone, some good oldies music, and a dart board game, the one with GT's pic on it, hit his nose and you get a 100 points http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...es/biggrin.gif

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Can I load the dart into my railgun? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/evil.gif

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

To do what? Fire at B&G patrons or play darts? Ashton, you're not collaborating with the enemy now, are you?

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Maybe. I was mainly wanting to cause more destruction to the dart board http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif
*tosses a dart and hits GT's eye on the dart board.*
How many points is the eye?

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

an innocent patron happens to notice the violence from their spot at the bar and, at sight of the red-hot ashton reaming, the poor visually-assaulted patron begins to wretch up his lunch.

the mass of vomit takes shape, and begins to display questionable signs of sentience. sloughing up to the bar, under its own power of movement, it orders a Spaten.

Puke is here.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

I'm red hot and screaming? I never knew that.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Well that would be reaming not screaming. Though the reaming with the Red hot poker cannon should cause screaming http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...ies/tongue.gif

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

I have no clue what you're talking about.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Just for invoking that thought Renegade, You're going to a Special Hell! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Muahaha, finally! I've made it into special hell! Would you care to join me RD? Get's a little boring down here with no one to talk to and beat over the head with heavy objects http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...ies/tongue.gif http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

NullAshton....you probably don't want to know what we're talking about.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Good. *tosses a bunch of flaming brimstone down to Renegade.*

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

The quiet scene is broken by a heavy throbbing sound. An immense star ship descends and lands in the parking lot.
A hatch opens and from it comes our Hero Power Man (TA DAAAA !!) .
He looks around at the empty landscape and exclaims "WERE IS EVERYONE ??? I had a devil of a time finding this place.
I mean it's dropped to PAGE 4."

But Now that I did find the place I want to invite everyone in for celebrate the fact that my empire has gone over 1 trillion in population. I also have just colonized my 7th Sphere World. So for the next day, or until the food is gone, LETS PARTY !!"

Several large hatches open in the ship, from them come a stream of cargo droids loaded with every type of food and drink.

Power Man leads them into the Bar. He wakes up the few people that appear to be sleeping. Hay Everybody FREE FOOD AND DRINK!!!

From yet other hatches several Divisions of large Heavy Troop Droids appear. They spread out and form a defensive boarder around the Bar & Grill. Supporting them are several large ACME Catapults these are armed with what appear to be large weights. Each weight has the ACME logo and a large 1T on their sides.

Yes these are the famed "One Ton Wanton Destruction Catapults"

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

puke finishes off his spaten and, propelled across the room by pseudopods, leaps into a crate of Powerman's pistacio nuts and begins to absorb them through osmosis.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Renegade 13 materializes from the shadows, wraithlike as always. Descending to Power Man's ship, he looks around for the beer.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Did someone say free food and brewskis? I'm in, oh ya, The old one mozies over to his usual cornor table and puts in his order.. He opens up the new brewski listings, and ponders as to which tasty, mouth watering, soul filling, decanters he shall order, he also notices the FBWs new skimpy outfits http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...es/biggrin.gif

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Have your fun while it lasts.

MUUWAAHAAHAA!!!

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

ah N.A. how little you know of us here in the old cantina,,,, you see we never worry, nor shake rattle and row, as this location is insured, watched over, and protected by his dreadful Furry Highness, the one and only GrowlTigga. his red hot poker should not be taken lightly nor his flesh eating killer mongooses. Oh ye of little faith and starch, beware, and remember, Its not nice to tittle with a GrowlTigga. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...es/biggrin.gif or to mess with an old Geezer's Brewskis.. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...ies/stupid.gif

In addition, when we can pry him away from his extra curricular activities, we have " The Gryphin" and his Circle the Wagons and "The Gryphin Position", neither of which can be discussed in open forum due to its.... well,,, lets just leave it at that .. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...es/biggrin.gif

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

SuicideJunkie narrowly avoids a pesky null-planet as he crash-lands his ship in the parking lot. As a cargo droid passes, carrying an oversized tub of cherry ice cream, SJ dives in.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Soon, Bar Wars II will start. Prepare yourself!

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

The joint forces of the Won-Ton Hut will crush you all. We've decided on the command position (which wasn't easy, as you can read in the last 50 or 75 or so posts in the Won-Ton). Soon, we will be ready to attack.....

SJ is there still any chance of getting you over to our side if we offer you free helpings of the best ice-cream in all the dimensions at the Won-Ton?

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

RD quickly forwards Strategia's threats to the local news groups

Franchise Spin Off Threatens Bar of Relaxed Veteran Patrons!!
The Won-Ton hut has been reported to threaten the longer, more respected, Phong's Head Bar and Grill in an unprovoked statement, truly showing the colours of Capitalist forces that conspire to amalgamate both the Residences. The Violent young members of the Won-Ton hut have already made several attempts upon the Bar and Grill in recent months, CEO Growltigga was unavailable for comment, but rest assured his response would be defiant, awe-inspiring and overly British...

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill (soon to be gone)
 

Strategia rushes to another news agency.

IMMINENT ERUPTION OF WARFARE EXPECTED!

In a recent comment, Joint Chief StrategiaInUltima of the Consolidated Forces of the Won-Ton Violence Take-Out Hut has verified the rumors of a second Bar War that would erupt soon. The Hut, initially opened as a competitor for the monopoly of the Forum Chat Bar & Grill, has been entwined in an open state of war with the Bar & Grill earlier, when the entire Northern Hemisphere was blown to kingdom come.

This war was not a war of aggression for the fledgling Hut, it was a war of defense. Set up as a fully acceptable capitalistic competitor for the B&G monopoly, the latter had sent gruesome threats to the Hut - one case was documented which apparently involved a game manual for Master of Orion III - and had openly attacked the establishment.

The Hut responded with dreadful force, mustering heavy orbital forces in response to the B&G's initial superiority on the ground. This action has caused many deaths, and it is still open for debate whether or not it was actually a B&G official who sent a fake message that ordered the obliteration of the Northern Hemisphere, or that the Hut did a last chance strike at the enemy, comparable to a US-Soviet nuclear war.

Recently, however, more forces have arrived in orbit, all bearing the logo of the Hut. When asked for comment, one of the Hut joint chiefs confirmed that they were preparing for war.

"The Hut cannot tolerate this stain on our planet any longer. The outright atrocities commited by the B&G in BWI - the Drench War, as you might recall - are too despicable to be left alone. I mean, bringing MOO3 into this..... We must get revenge for the despicable acts commited to the Hut. The last war ended in an apparent stalemate, the Armistice was signed when a victor had yet to truly emerge, though the B&G was quickly gaining strength in the last days of the Great War. We cannot let their growth go on uncontrolled. We must take back what was once ours. We will succeed!"

And in entirely unrelated news, the Won-Ton Violence Take-Out Hut has recently opened new venues in the Fifth Temporal Dimension and the Ninth Spacial Dimension.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill (soon to be gone)
 

Phong's Head Bar and Grill Staff Member condemns Unprovoked Aggression by rivals

Following Joint Chief StrategiaInUltima's message to the Press Phong's Head Bar and Grill bar tender Raging Deadstar decided to set the record straight in an exclusive Interview.

"As a Bartender my job is a simple one. I aim to keep my patrons and customers happy, not forgetting my superiors. The Phong's head Bar and Grill has always been a place for the wearied galactic emperors to come and rest their loins and relax with a brewski. These upstanding overstressed members of the Galactic community who visit here are peerless and relaxed within our venue."

"Needless to say when The Wonton Hut started up, my superiors felt threatened, as any business would. Our Negotiations started with offers for a mutual agreement between the two, alliances beneficial to both!"

"In recent months it has become clear that this is not what the Won Ton Hut desires. They resorted to violence, their war-machine forcing the Bar and Grill side into ever escalating conflict, leading to the destruction of half a planet and a loss of life unseen in this sector. A ceasefire was called and we respected such a pact. The Bar and Grill patrons more than happy to relax in peace and cartoon violence. The Hut has responded with an unparalleled military build up!"

"Make No Mistake, The Hut speaks of Revenge and settling the score, but amalgamation is their goal. Nothing Short of Subjugation and Domination will sate the Joint Chief StrategiaInUltima's Bloodlust. They claim that this planet is theirs, these insurgents. They respond with fire when we extend the olive Branch! We have given them appeasement when war was still a viable option, the Phong's Head Bar and Grill deciding the conflict to deadly to allow to spread. The Won-Ton Hut's tactics have been far too similar to the unheeded expansion of a German state in the early 1940's. We have given peace a chance and wish for co-existence with the Hut. But if it comes to War I can Guarantee you that the loyal patrons of the Phong's Head will rather Fight Standing than Serve on our Knee's!"

"We shall go on to the end, we shall fight in Space, we shall fight on the planets and cantinas, we shall fight with growing confidence and growing strength in the vacuum, we shall defend our Home away from Home, whatever the cost may be, we shall fight on the Patio's, we shall fight on the polished oak bars, we shall fight in the beer cellars and by the entrance to the FBW changing rooms, we shall fight wherever the Hut may take us; we shall never surrender!"

http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Settling in on the roof of the cantina, protected by a null-technology field, Renegade lines his sniper rifle up on the street in front of the Bar and Grill, awaiting those who would dare to attack its patrons...

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

The old one sits at his table surrounded by very small, hairy, smelly, stained, deizens of various societies and depths. He begins instructing them into gorilla warfare type insurgencies. He also dusts off the "O" word that has been hidden secretly for all these years, he gently puts it into a small box similiar to a small brewski keg which is marked in bright red, only to be opened and mailed when under extreme distress.....

he talks with the various varmits,,, sigh, apparently the warmongering, violent prone extremists at the Won Ton apparantly do not look for peace. They shall rue the day before their existance is blown into the winds after the B&G members attend a Chilli cookoff between Puke and Tesco http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...es/biggrin.gif

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Well, frankly, when it comes to the whole fighting and death thing, I believe in a Do-It-Yourself philosophy.

Have you tried this Poison flavored ice cream? Its quite good.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Hey Propaganda is the best tool in warfare http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...es/biggrin.gif

Dons his Minister of Mis-Information Uniform.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

False accusations by B&G proved! Hut warfare was defensive!

In a recent interview, Joint Chief StrategiaInUltima of the Hut Forces has released information regarding the previous state of war between the two restaurants in this forum.

"Those B&G bastards claim we're akin to the Third Reich. Well, let it be known to the general public that this is NOT the case! We are NOT violent, bloodthirsty aggressors - most of us, in any case - we are merely putting the famous quote from Sun Tzu into practice - Attack is the best Defense. The Great War of some time ago was a war of defense for the Hut. We were attacked, and forced in the defensive. To prevent any further occurences like this from happening, we are now planning a campaign to paralyze the B&G offensive forces forever. We will NOT eradicate it completely, nor demand control of it - like the B&G CEO, Drooltigga or whatever, did - we will merely make sure they will not be capable of aggression versus the Hut any more. We want peaceful coexistence of the two restaurants, and unlike the B&G, we mean it. And to those who do not believe my claim of B&G aggression, here is an eyewitness account of the first hostilities between the B&G and the Hut:"

"This example was only the first in a rather long line of threats and attacks on the new-found Hut. We did not attack the B&G, we were forced to defend ourselves with all we had for our very lives. Now, we will take revenge. We will strike back. We will take back what was once ours."

The B&G CEO, Mr. Growltigga, was not available for comments.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

after absorbing a metric ton of pistachio nuts, the engorged mass of vomit waddles over to the Mac's table and takes a glass of Duvel from a passing FBW.

After a brief and hushed conversation with the Mac, Puke scribbles down a wholesale order to extremefood.com and hands it to a nearby mongoose to be fulfilled.

After seeing this place (and the containing universes) destroyed at least three times, hell escaped from, and new universes created by the power of the patrons' will, Puke isnt to worried about any johnny-come-lately invaders.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

You might want to write your wills now, otherwise it'll be too late.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Hut War Defensive? The Facts.

The recent Press report by Joint Chief StrategiaInUltima today has been replied to by another statement from the B&G, and also nomination as best piece of fiction.

Bar Tender and Minister of Information of the Bar and Grill had this to say.

"I could make another speech to convince you. But quite simply I must break my political oath, and tell you the truth! Many reprehensible things have been done by both sides in the Original Bar War, but today I show you the truth behind the Hut's plans, thanks to an Inside source."

"Also This Document contains information on the vastly overpowered military of the hut. They say they wish to even the sides out, They speak of "making sure the Cantina can no longer cause aggression to the Hut." and "Pre-emptive Strikes!" Also if you read the Joint Chiefs latest release you will find the ending very contradictory with what he said originally. Peaceful co-existence one moment and revenge and domination the next. This is a war of conquest and capitalist policy, I hope this evidence proves to you that the Bar and Grill is being unfairly invaded by an opposing force. And That quite frankly, my fellow Members of the Galactic Community, Is Fact."

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

My forces are going to monitor your traffic for suspicious activities. Hostilities will not occur from me unless there is a threat to the hut.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Clearly my comments have been taken out of context. By threats I mean overtures intended to lull you into a false sense of peace and security.

Althought I might be sincere if you consider signing over the B&G to me.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Maybe we need to have a written peace agreement or something.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

I don't know if there can be peace when clearly there is so much apathy here in the B&G. I mean, I've got all kinds of recipes I'd like to share.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

We can manage. If they go to war with us, we can just frag them from orbit.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Where is this Growltigger! Before the exchange of fire, let's treat first... innocents need not be killed in the crossfire!

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill (soon to be gone)
 

Apathy? No, just protectionism. We don't like intruders! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill (soon to be gone)
 

Let the fighting between our two clienteles cease! Let us join together in brotherhood and harmony.

*fingers a large red flashing button beneath his desk*

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill (soon to be gone)
 

FEAR THE BREAD PUDDING!

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill (soon to be gone)
 

We are only interested in your dessert menu! Someone bring me a waiter!

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Seeing RudyHuxtable and NullAshton strolling without a care in the world towards the Bar & Grill, argueing vehemently, Renegade lowers his eye to the high-powered sniper scope. Lining up his .308 caliber rifle on the slightly bobbing head of Rudy, Renegade aims for his target's head, leads him by about 6 inches, then gently and slowly pulls the trigger...

As the first body falls to the ground and starts twitching, NullAshton gapes for a moment before sprinting off towards the Nut Hut, leaving Rudy twitching in the street.

Renegade then stands up and shouts, "Hey, Rudy, wake up! Come on, that wasn't a real bullet, it just knocked you down and out for a moment. GET UP!"

Renegade then scampers down to find a new perch, now that his old one has been exposed...

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

? I'm safe in one of the battle moons, talking to you over communication channels...

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Sorry, battle jupiters.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Has to be said...

"Do you think he's compensating for something?"

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

I think that could be counted as suspicious activty, the shooting Rudy thing. You have 10 minutes to leave the premises before we open fire.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

You never claimed Diplomatic Immunity http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gifThese are our lands.

"In My culture I would well be within my rights to Dismember you!" ~ Teal'c

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Meh, still suspicious. You have 5 more minutes.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Oookay, times up.

The battle jupiters start firing shots at the B&G, probally vaporizing most of it, and killing most of the inhabitants, as well as collateral damage over in the parking lot.