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-   -   The Funniest Canadian Joke. (http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/showthread.php?t=8394)

tbontob February 2nd, 2003 01:18 AM

Re: The Funniest Canadian Joke.
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Ragnarok:
No, it wasn't me. I was the second one. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...s/rolleyes.gif http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif
<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">ROFLOL. That was funny! My parrot perked up and started to laugh with me. And he is three rooms away!!!! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif

tbontob February 2nd, 2003 01:21 AM

Re: The Funniest Canadian Joke.
 
When I read Ragnaroks reply, I didn't have a chance to read Primitive's.

By this time I was "really" rolling on the floor. And my parrot is laughing his silly head off too!

primitive February 2nd, 2003 01:44 AM

Re: The Funniest Canadian Joke.
 
Tbontob:

Thank you for your kind words and the set up for the "Canadizer."

Pop by the Cantina for a drink on me. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon6.gif

tbontob February 2nd, 2003 02:07 AM

Re: The Funniest Canadian Joke.
 
Quote:

Originally posted by primitive:
Tbontob:

Thank you for your kind words and the set up for the "Canadizer."

Pop by the Cantina for a drink on me. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon6.gif

<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Primitive, let me tell you what I found was so funny about your joke.

The moose is the largest land animal in North America and if I am not mistaken in South America too.

Yep, it apparently beats the grizzly pound for pound.

What is not so well known is that it beats the bear or any other animal in Canada as being the most dangerous land animal in Canada.

And the moose is tall!!!! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif

And it is not domesticated like the sheep.

So even if the pimp could somehow get two moose under his arms (very, very unlikely even for a very, very tall pimp), the human is likely to be on the receiving end of any amorous adventure. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif

And after being pronged and repeatedly gorged, the moose is likely to stomp him into the ground for good measure.

Your formula was a good one. Putting it into practice made your joke even funnier. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif

primitive February 2nd, 2003 03:17 AM

Re: The Funniest Canadian Joke.
 
Tbontob.
We have plenty of moose in Norway also. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon6.gif

And the moose is in many ways just like humans.

Every autumn ( mating season) some sexually frustrated young males come into peoples gardens and eat fermented apples left on the trees.
Getting really drunk, they run around the suburbs, acting just like English soccerfans. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif

Ragnarok February 2nd, 2003 04:40 AM

Re: The Funniest Canadian Joke.
 
tbontob, I'm glad you enjoyed my comments. I was hoping to draw some laughter. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif

I too enjoyed Primitives secret to making a joke into a canadian joke. Very well thought out. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif

tbontob February 2nd, 2003 04:41 AM

Re: The Funniest Canadian Joke.
 
Primitive, that is amusing. LOL

Our moose do not act like that...at least I haven't heard they are. Maybe it is because of our greater land area, so moose and people tend to not come into intimate contact.

Drunk moose! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif I have heard of drunken birds and drunken small animals, but a drunken moose is a new one on me! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif

My impression is that the moose is a shy, retiring creatures who would rather run away than fight...unless the bull moose is in heat at which time he can be unpredictable. But fight they will if cornered by wolves, etc.

So, I thought someone out there would have contested this statement I made earlier:

Quote:

Originally posted by tbontob:
What is not so well known is that it beats the bear or any other animal in Canada as being the most dangerous land animal in Canada.
<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Is it true? Yes, but not in what people normally perceive it to be.

But how? Road accidents. Hitting a moose is like hitting a brick wall. Anywhere from a half ton to almost a ton of it.

They are just doing what moose do, going from one place to another. And, of course crossing the road. In Norway it would be to eat apples and have a good time. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif

Fyron February 2nd, 2003 06:14 AM

Re: The Funniest Canadian Joke.
 
There is a place in Africa where a lot of fruit ripens all at once, and ferments. A lot of different types of animals, ranging from monkeys to elephants, eat it (as there isn't too much to eat) and get drunk. It happens every year. My biology teacher in high school showed us a video of it. It was quite hilarious. Defintitely gets an f on the meter.

David E. Gervais February 2nd, 2003 01:58 PM

Re: The Funniest Canadian Joke.
 
Ok, I'll try to 'Canadianize' the "****-List"..

1) The Lincoln Log Eh! (It's big and it floats!)
2) The Phantom **** Eh! (You felt it come out, you heard it splash, but when you look, it's nowhere to be seen!)
3) The Peek-a-boo **** Eh! (Every time you strain, it peeks out, but when you stop straining to breath it hides back in!)
4) The Brain-hemorage through your nose **** Eh!(..and it's not called blushing!)
5) The Super snake Eh! (also known as the spiral ****!)
6) The Memorable **** Eh! (So strange, big or unique that you need a witness!)
7) The Popcorn **** Eh! (you know plop, plop no fizz oh what a relief it is!)
8) The Niagra **** Eh! (aka the liquid ****!)
9) The Kodak **** Eh! (similar to the Memorable **** but you grab a camera because no-one is around!)
10) The Air **** Eh! (It's when you spend a half hour on the bowl farting!)
11) The Oxigen Deprivation **** Eh! (It stinks so much you have trouble breathing!)
12) The TNT **** Eh! (The one that litterly blows out of you in a matter of seconds, often associated with the 'liquid ****'!)
13) The Alien **** Eh! (Often recognized by it's strange yellow/green color! Are babies aliens?)
14) The Drain Blocker Eh! (The one you have to chop up in order to get it to flush!)
15) The Sanctuary **** Eh! (It's when you don't actually **** but use the privacy of the bathroom to get away from it all!)
16) The 'Executive' **** Eh! (reserved for the 'person' in the office that always has a **** at the same time every day!)
17) The literary **** Eh! (Where you bring a book or newspaper and fill your brain while emptying your bowels!)

Another way to make a joke Canadian is to insert random polite words like 'please', 'sorry', 'thank you', etc! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/tongue.gif We Canadians are known to be extremely polite!

Cheers!

tbontob February 2nd, 2003 03:22 PM

Re: The Funniest Canadian Joke.
 
Quote:

Originally posted by DavidG:
</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Originally posted by tbontob:
What is not so well known is that it beats the bear or any other animal in Canada as being the most dangerous land animal in Canada.

<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">What is this based on? Personaly I would rather come face to face with a moose than a grizly or polar bear.</font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Sorry David, you are a bit late with this posting. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif

I commented on the intended "misdirection" earlier. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif


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