Re: Ermor Falls to Just Fires
 

Actually, it was because he (it?) is a Monolith. Get it? Monny the Monolith. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...ies/stupid.gif

Re: Ermor Falls to Just Fires
 

?

Re: Ermor Falls to Just Fires
 

What is the question mark for?

Clearly states just where you linked, in relevant part:

Mods:.... The Kitchen Sink Mod prevents the casting of 4 globals, Arcane Nexus, Burden of Time, Astral Corruption, and Utterdark.....

Later in the thread LLamabeast decided to combine all of the mods in one mod, the Kingmaker Mod, so it would be easier to download and install for the players.

Re: Ermor Falls to Just Fires
 

The giants of Niefelheim were victorious in their battle against Gath's advance force. The enormous physical fortitude provided by the E9/N9 blessing allowed the giants to stand up to quite some punishment, though it stands to be noted that fully half of the Gath army had contracted some sort of foul malady. Speculation is that frustrated soldiers had fornicated with the native citizens of the area, and were infected with some sort of virulent mildew. The author would prefer not to think about this however, being under the distinct impression that Agarthans are mono-gendered.

Regardless of these facts, two other things are well known about the conflict. The first, is that this battle took place with very little mage support on the Gath side - perhaps a cagey move intended to inflict maximal casualties on the giants, while retaining as much of Gath's real power as possible. The other fact, being that the battle was won in large part due to the large number of Niefel Giants who arrived to support their Jarls. It is well known that with the declining populations of full-blooded Niefel Giants, that very few will actually march to war anymore - and this seems to illustrate that their southern borders are relatively undefended, unless protected by their allies in MA Man.

Re: Ermor Falls to Just Fires
 

MA Man is not in the game, and if they had been, they likely would be dead by now.

MA Man is a fictional nation, that owns no provinces, but needed by llamabeast to "somehow" collect gold and gems for distribution to winners of the arena matches.

So whoever your scouts see, it is NOT Ma Man, who has never been in the game.

Re: Ermor Falls to Just Fires
 

Sorry, there was errata noted in that article.

Obviously the reporter meant to reference "LA Man", and this publication is embarrassed and humbled by this error. He has also been fired, and we're training a nice Markata gentleman to take over the story as it unfolds.

Re: Ermor Falls to Just Fires
 

Basically what X is saying is that Man is actually Two-Eyes of Utgard, who has blown the wealth of an entire nation on a pimped out mansion, a posse of bikini clad sethkonas, and a diamond studded trident.

ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

Wait for it...

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

Damn-staled by a minute. Should have made my coffee after the turn not before. Arghhh...

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

So long to all of you from LA Pythium. My epitaph is "He killed a few monkeys on his way out".
http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

GG Lingchih. If someone will point us in your direction, we'll do our best to avenge you.

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

Avenge him? His epitaph is about a monkeycide, like it would be a honour!

Point us in your direction and we'll soil your grave unless other markatas have managed to do so enough times!

(but other than that, so long and GG)

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

Sure Utgard is at 784 - send remote attack spells that way. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

Your monkeyboys will have to climb (or hop) over the rotting bodies of all the fir bolg slingers under the walls of Utgard.

Hint: We need to be pointed because we can't see.

Buggy graphs
 

There seems to be some sort of problem with the graphs this turn. Eriu's provinces numbers don't make any sense; it looks like there was an error in the calculations and a garbage value was accidentally put in there.

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

Only the elves may play such tricks, Utgard. Like the trick with this turn's score graph... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

...and frying my video card while watching an Eriu battle, which finally got fixed after ~3 weeks. I admit, Eriu is kind of spooky. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/shock.gif

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

I'm under the impression he was fighting with the demonic monkeys, not the nice cute little buggers. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...ies/tongue.gif

Lanka - the other White Monkey. O.o

TftF: Of Knights and Sidhe
 

You look at the book excitedly. Another of the diaries of Anonymous, the High priest of Monny. The diaries have been scattered across the land because of time, but you, you have made it your life's work to peice together the life of this influential figure. Ulm didn't win the war, not by a long shot, but no one knows why. Could this reveal the secret? You read:

It's Early Spring. The three-turn NAP has been broken by the Sidhe, those lying two-faced bastards. I guess it was inevitable. Everything's under siege. Sigh. Time to bust out our reserves. Eriu shall rue the day it decided that Ulm was an easy target. Even if we fail, we'll give the Sidhe one hell of a time while we fall. Ulm isn't stopped that easily. MA Ulm is the last; the vampire-counts were wiped out before this crazed war began and EA Ulm was destroyed by someone or another, I honestly don't know. What a sad world, where you don't know why your cousins were killed or enslaved.

The Black Knights are eager, ready to fight. Monty, the new Black Lord, knows, though. The Black Knights have died for the honor of Ulm before; they almost certainly shall die again. Such eager young people. I can almost understand Monny's intentions, now; a world with Ulm's ideals would prosper. You're powerful because you are mighty, and kind, and charismatic, not because a crazy pretender says you are. But the Sidhe wish to fight to discover the truth, so a fight they shall have.

The Sidhe are armed with Ulm's weapons. What irony. Give a friend a weapon, for their safety perhaps, and your friend will kill you. I can't say we haven't warred with others, but they were all already dead. Walking corpses. But I'm rambling on. I have work to do; a lot of it, all named Sidhe.

-Anonymous, High priest of Ulm

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

...and there it is.

Don't dare impugn my honor, Anonymous. You were given fair warning our NAP3 was over 4 turns ago.

No, you weren't attacked because you're an easy target, you were attacked for providing offensive weaponry to Eriu's enemy. Or have you forgotten:
In fact, if you can dislodge old Paddy O'Giantslayer from the Ulmish capital, you might actually stand a chance of coming out on top.

And yes, we've found those Fire Brands to be quite useful. But you already knew that... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

Perhaps you've forgotten that Utgard hasn't taken me up on the offer (or even provided any signs of noticing it)? In fact, if I remember correctly, LA Utgard accepted a peace offer quite some time ago. Why go to war over someone not providing weapons to an enemy you're at peace with?

We've covered this some time ago. I don't need a windmill in a beard to invalidate your argument. I can't impugn your honor because the Sidhe have none.

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

Darkwind,
Utgard observes all but was not aware your offer required any return notice. We appreciated the thought nonetheless. We sympathize with your plight, having experienced a sneak attack by the Sidhe and realizing it is about as pleasurable as a staph infection.

We offer the following poem to Eriu's neighbors as recompense if we seemed ungrateful for the generosity you offered that we admittedly never received:

"First the sneaky Sidhe came for Utgard, and I didn’t speak up, because I wasn’t a cudly werewolf.

Then they came for the Ulm, and I didn’t speak up, because I wasn’t a studly black knight.

Then they came for me, and there was no one left to speak up for me. "

Utgard hereby gives notice of our NAP termination = 3 turn notice with Eriu. We will not let Ulm stand alone in its final hours. We advise all of Eriu's neighbors do the same lest they find themselves alone in their final hours.

Re: ELF - Eriu Less Friendly
 

And this, my friends, is the reason why one should always fight their opponents into oblivion.

Re: ELF - Eriu Less Friendly
 

No Atul, the lesson here is actually don't start a fight unless you can finish it.

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

The entire nation of Marignon is moved by the heroic struggle of Ulm and Utgard. Citizen action groups are forming to discuss the plight of the Ulmish refugees, young men are signing up for the army's elite self-flagellation corp, and even children are contributing by gathering firewood for the witch-hunter's upcoming fires. The Council of Marignon has no choice but to listen to the will of its people. We withdraw from all treaties with Eriu.

Re: TFtF: Eriu Inside - true story
 

Excellent.

Marignon, we shall see you in 3 months, about the time Ulm becomes mongoloid.

Utgard, we shall see you in 6 months, about the time Marignon becomes mongoloid...surely even a blind werewolf can count on his claws that 7 + 3 = 10? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

The Fall of Eriu
 

Note the blithe overconfidence of the Sidhe; no doubt the cause of their diplomatic troubles, and the reason they are already at war with 4 nations. I could not fault any of Eriu's other neighbors if they decide they to enter the war because of past slights by the Sidhe.

Re: The Fall of Eriu
 

I did notice them Sidhe's strange idea that they could defeat Ulm in three turns (perhaps they haven't met the Black Knights?), but four nations? Is T'ien Ch'i in on this too? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...s/confused.gif I'm not entirely sure if Jotunheim counts, since they seem to be down to only a fort now. Poor giants.

On a different note, I've really wanted to post a report like the one I just did for a while. Except more cheerful, obviously. Who knew comedic relief could be so depressed at times?

Re: ELF - Eriu Less Friendly
 

Or secure really long NAPs. >.>

Re: TFtF: Eriu Inside - true story
 

Glad to see Eriu has booked all its neighbors for appointments in an orderly fashion. Would hate to get in the way of an Ulmish battleaxe or Marignese crossbow bolt.

Anyway, we hope there are no sidhe hiding out in Utgard - obviously should one be spotted, or anything that looks like a sidhe, or even a pile of sidhe droppings (imagine it looks like Froot Loops?) that would require us to bump our appointment to the front of the queue! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

<font color="brown">@JimMorrison: </font>
= Boring.

By turn 50, I intend to either either win this game or be dead. And I have no delusions about victory.

Apparently my neighbors do, or think their own neighbors are fools... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif


<font color="brown">@DonCorazon:
You can't catch what you can't see... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif</font>

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

At this point in the game, if the score graphs are looking very bad for your nation, and you have back to back stales, you are being set to ai without further ado.

It does take me time, and it takes other players not in the game time to set your race to ai. So I would ask that if you are on death's door, kindly set yourself to ai.

It takes you far less time than it does me.

This turn, MA Vanheim and EA Suaromatia are being set to AI. If I can get a volunteer not in the game to set ma vanheim to ai that would be great. Already found one for EA Sauromatia.

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

Cleveland, my point was not to randomly make really long NAPs. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...ies/tongue.gif In my experience, in games where true NAPs are even applicable, when you secure peace with a vanquished foe, a short NAP leads all too often to that battered player dropping the NAP at the least convenient time for you - in almost every instance. So if you find it boring to not be kicked in the balls every time you bend over, then have at it. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...ies/tongue.gif

Dr P knows what I am talking about. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

&lt; Looks longingly at his steel-toed ball-kicking boots. &gt; I'm sorry ladies, maybe next time.

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

Vanquished foe!?...your geopolitical read is way off and thus your advice doesn't make sense. I doubt anyone makes peace with vanquished foes - what is the point? Utgard never lost a fort to Eriu...we each had our reasons for a ceasefire but it wasn't because anyone was vanquished.

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

Well let me rephrase then - former foe. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...ies/tongue.gif

When you fight, either end it, or make sure it never starts again - or you will eventually regret the third option. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...es/redface.gif

Re: ELF - Eriu Less Friendly
 

JM: Agreed. Especially in a big MP game - need to make war quick and decisive lest the turtlers and merchants of war get too far ahead while you and your foe expend resources needlessly. It is an issue of gauging your foe. Experience helps. Cheers.

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

Agreed. But in this case, I had no intention of keeping the peace beyond our mutually agreed 10-turn truce (see previous post).

I hadn't counted on LA Marignon. But only a mental defective would let the 3rd largest nation in the game take part in a 4-on-1 clobbering of the 6th largest...Mari has forced his neighbors to attack him immediately. Or wait until he gobbles up Eriu, then attack him. Or hope that *snicker* Jotunheim, *snicker* Utgard, or *snicker* Ulm will actually get the lion's share of Eriu's lands...

No bother. Few nations can make victory as expensive as can Eriu in the mid-game (see "Charge of the Light Brigade") http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

Oh my this is exciting. We should make a reality show based on the mega-game, and use the proceeds to purchase..... I don't know, dancing girls or something. \:D/

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

I always wanted a bar with dancing girls! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

Opps...too much information!

You lot win the prize for most exciting part of Kingmaker to live in. [img]/threads/images/Graemlins/icon09.gif[/img]

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

I'm glad to see that the Sidhe have abandoned their previous assessment of the war (victory in 6 turns) and have instead accepted that they will be beaten. Still, this daily flip-flopping just underlines the essential threat of the Sidhe. You can never tell where you stand with them. Do they have armies on your border? Will they trapeeze in a dozen thugs? Do they see you as an easy victory, or a certain doom? The answers change from day to day with the Sidhe, according to the blowing of the winds.

With Marignon, you get what you get. We stand by our allies, we fight against our enemies, and our armies move 1 province a turn, just like they used to when men were men and women were women. With us you won't have any of this fickle leaping about in the score graphs, just a slow upward crawl as our armies laboriously advance, incinerating all before them.

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

Bandar Log wishes to buy large quantities of whatever ware one might have that incurs protection from fire. The bigger flames the better.

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

I hear if you smear butter in your fur, you can withstand temperatures in excess of 500°!

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

While giving you a nice cris... eh... tan.

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

Why do you think that Ulm wouldn't be able to take a good share of Erian (Eriuan? Eriish?) lands? No Sidhe has yet faced the fury of the Black Knights, nor the Guardians (alright, one did, but he died), nor both at once.

As for the Light Brigade, if Eriu is supposed to represent the Russians, well, the Black Knights aren't very light. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif If Eriu is supposed to represent the British, well, I'm glad you've accepted that the generals of Eriu are quite stupid and lead their own men to their deaths. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...ies/tongue.gif

@atul: Once this is over with, I can sell you Fire brands and Burning Pearls. Not that you need them; butter does do wonders for preventing painful fiery cremation, when combined with salt and pepper. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

Tir na n'Og = Eriu = Irish

And I like calling them Erians, it's so risque and provocative. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...ies/tongue.gif

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

I just want to assure people that I'm not down for the count. I took back my capital (which was strangely O'Giantslayer-less), which was guarded by two Sidhe casting Foul Vapors (without poison resistance!) One fled after being poisoned, the other died after it came into range of Magma Bolt spam. I haven't taken many casualties yet, and I still have a fair amount of money to coast along.

The Sidhe still haven't met the Black Knights http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

Nor would we have any intention to.

Utgard has compared the Sidhe to an infection of staph. I personally think syphilis is a better analogy. Your sanity slowly slipping away as you just...can't...fight...on your own terms.

Meanwhile, we'll continue to chisel you down. You failed to mention that my sacrificial Tuatha brought down 15% of your capital mages, and riddled the remainder with afflictions. Nor that the Ulmish countryside is being pillaged into oblivion. Nor that, all the while, the Black Knights have been chasing shadows... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...es/biggrin.gif

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

Ulm's fighting terms are "find the enemy", "hit it until it dies", and "heat it up until it dies". So far Eriu's been quite gracious in providing the latter two http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

Six smiths? That's as many as I could recruit in a couple turns if I had a mind to (and I do have a mind to). I've been lax on my defenses and research. No more.

Also, the countryside is being pillaged? Well, to be honest, "meh" is all I can say. Most of it usually ends up with 0 resources anyways due to the sheer number of Forts I've fit in there. All that matters is that my forts still produce 200+ resources per turn.

Finally, the Black Knights haven't been chasing anyone. All they've been doing so far is guarding provinces and taking out-of-the-way areas. Time to go on the offensive, no? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

The Drudge Report
 

On turn 36, for those interested, here is a list of the dead and fallen(ai)

A. Early Age

Tien Chi
Caelum
Agartha
Vanheim
Hinnom
Arcos
Ulm
Ermor
Marverni
Sauromatia
yomi

B. Middle Age

Abysia
Oceania
Ryleh
Vanheim
Ermor
Pythium

C Late Age

Mictlan
Pythium
Atlantis
Patala

Surprisingly, The Late Age appears to be holding its own
so far. With only 4 races vanquished. Though several races are also on death's door but are not listed as their owners
are persisting to fight until the bitter end.

The Leaders are really 7 races, and at this early stage it is too close to say there is a clear leader.

EA Helheim has the most provinces, but lags in research. But does have the most gems by a good bit

LA Agartha has a large lead in research, and is 3rd in provinces. 1st in income, and 2nd in gems.

Then in no particular order the other 5 leaders are EA Niefel, LA Caelum, LA Marignon, MA Eriu, and MA Marignon.

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

That is Utgard tact for you! Perhaps we need to enroll our diplomats in etiquette school.

Thanks for the update Xietor, quite interesting. So much war on our side of the world, such a shame. I wonder where Eriu (and Utgard) would have been had we managed to sign our NAP?

Seems the turtling / war merchant strategy in the early game has benefited LA Agartha. I cannot believe Z has gone so long without enraging his neighbors. He has clearly surpassed my silver tongue diplomacy! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

PS MA Bandar, we were just kidding about avenging whoever it was who died. Was it just a coincidence your scout was caught in our capital, er that province?? Give Peace a Chance!!!

Re: ELF - Eriu Liberation Front
 

Same as we both are now, nervously awaiting the late-game hangman's noose.

Surely he died in a hail of hilariously inaccurate arrows. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

Not for long... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

<font color="blue">++++++++

P.S. The Eriu Polar Bears send their warm regards from icy Lake PontchUtgardtrain. Thanks to the Spring thaw, the water temp has spiked to a refreshing 0.007 degrees Celsius! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif</font>