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-   -   Forum Chat Bar & Grill (http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/showthread.php?t=10937)

mac5732 May 17th, 2006 12:17 AM

Re: Not Quite THAT Poor!!
 
the old one watches the goings on, smiles and mutters to himself, ah,, everything is back to normal here... he then orders his usual brewski, bacon, eggs, hash browns and rye toast...

Renegade 13 May 17th, 2006 01:21 AM

Re: Not Quite THAT Poor!!
 
His blobs of gelatinous matter destroyed, Renegade attempts to blend into the rafters, hoping no one notices a slightly darker patch amongst the omnipresent darkness...and hoping no one desired revenge after being floorboarded!

Raging Deadstar May 17th, 2006 06:24 AM

Re: Not Quite THAT Poor!!
 
RD Quickly grabs one of his comically over-sized six-shooters, the ones that fire 7 shots. There's the sound of impossibly loud gunshots, a rotten smell and interesting curse words.

"If you're monsters touch anything behind this here bar, it's on your TAB!"

The announcement is made less intimidating by a clothespin on RD's nose.

Black_Knyght May 17th, 2006 06:41 AM

Re: Not Quite THAT Poor!!
 
One by one, dozens of Skunkupine heads pop up over the edges of the Bar. They look at one another and start muttering to each other. Suddenly, several jump up onto the counter and grabbed their neighbor, hoisting them up and aiming the backside at Raging Deadstar.

Silence fills the room, except for the faintest of groans coming from the still-reeking closet.

In unison, they grasp the tail of their partner and cock it back with an audible "caa-chik".....

Puke May 17th, 2006 12:39 PM

Re: O\'s??
 
covered with scorch marks, and with splintered chunks of floor boards sticking out of him, a look of panic washed over puke's... ...features

in slow motion, RD shakes his head as the lead skunkupine calls out the order: "Fffffffffiiiiiiiiii-----"

Puke leaps through the air, and describes a gracefull arc towards the bar "iiiiiiiiirrrrrrrrrrrrrr-----"

As a large mass of vomit, Puke can disable his olfactory senses when the need arises. But more important things need to be saved. With a wet *splork* he lands.

"rrrrreeeeeeeeeeeee!" and the skunkupines discharge their oily stench. RD is coated with truely horid things, and his eyes begin to burn and water.

Fortuneatly, a large mass of vomit is covering all of the taps. With a newly formed pseudopod, puke turns on the one labled "Spaten" and with the two little shovels on it. Ahh. the beer is safe.



what? no one else thinks its good that their taps are covered in vomit? what?

Strategia_In_Ultima May 17th, 2006 01:28 PM

Re: Not Quite THAT Poor!!
 
As if the pandemonium wasn't enough as it was, an eardrum-rending scream suddenly penetrates the Cantina, getting louder and louder.

"Kaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnn!! !!! KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHNN NNNNNNNN!!!!!"

All patrons get a stunning (literally, the scream's pitch is high enough to paralyze the brain stem for a short while) demonstration of the Doppler effect, as a figure recognized by some as The Dreaded Strategia bursts through the front door, crashes through the bar, creates a gaping hole in the rear wall, leaves a trail of destruction through the back area and smashes right through the rear wall, to vanish in the night, still screaming.

Raging Deadstar May 17th, 2006 04:33 PM

Re: Not Quite THAT Poor!!
 
Perhaps the stench of the skunkupine is also effecting his brain, but as they discharge their stinky weeapon RD is hit with an image, that of growltigga and the glorious fights of old, the red hot poker cannon.

He raises one of his six shooters and fires a bullet at the lead skunkupine's... 'jacksey'. The result is a incendiary explosion which RD misses the brunt of, passing out from the awful smell behind the bar.


* Cartoon Physics state that noxious gases are flammable.

Puke May 17th, 2006 04:51 PM

Re: O\'s??
 
Many noxious gasses ARE flamable. I think the particular you are after, is that in cartoons skunks would be farting methane instead of spraying an oil.

As if I didnt already have enough scorch marks on me from the Texan's blaster, RD's muzzel flash sets of a FAE generated by the skunk emissions. The skunkupines are blown across the room, and bounce about, rolling like pillbugs.

The pressure wave blows Puke off the taps, and spatters him all over Turin.

Great, now I have to re-coallesce.

TurinTurambar May 17th, 2006 05:00 PM

Re: O\'s??
 
Turin's reaction of course is a sharp intake of breath, which at this instant of course is a very bad idea. With Skunkupine oil-stench filling his nostrils and and "Essence of Puke" spattering the back of his throat, Turin vomits noisily and slumps into a retching pile under his table...

mac5732 May 17th, 2006 11:44 PM

Re: O\'s??
 
The old one looks at the possible Brewski Destruction. THATS IT HE YELLS

HERE YE HERE YE, THE BREW TAPS AND BREWSKIS ARE OFF LIMITS TO ALL MEYHEM AND VIOLENCE IN THIS HERE CANTINA. THEY MUST BE PROTECTED ALONG WITH ALL FBWS....

VIOLATION OF THIS SHALL BE UNDESCRIBABLE

SOME THINGS ARE SACRED AND THE TAPS AND BREWSKIS ARE SOME...


Completeing his long winded speech. the old one thks the putris mass for protecting the brewskis and gives him a medallion which will protect him from the lew worshipers...
http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...es/biggrin.gif


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