Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

says Tigger to the room sotto vocce

"Chaps, who the hell invited the bad Johnny Depp clone?, no-one talks like that in real life.

I suspect he must be some kind of undercover agent sent here to spy on us, probably from the NSA, the CIA or god's teeth, even worse, the IRS!!

I reckon we get rid of him, I know a brilliant way.

Taz?, oh Taz? this pirate bloke just said you looked like a girl!!"

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Gryppo, the Witch Queen of Angmar wont wear leather, she says it gives her a rash. And apparently she says that her fell-beast won't handle her wearing wet-look PVC.

Ho hum

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Gt, good luck on the quit smoking and diet gig, been there still trying both..... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon9.gif hasn't worked so far, I still have my same figure and only managed to cut back on the smoking.. but luck to ya...

Gryphin, Remember the old saying, behind each good man is a good woman... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif

just some ideas Mac

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Hey, I cked in at the IRC Chat and no ones been there, where is everyone, come on back and tip a chat or two, it used to be a lively place, did everyone go on vacation ..... see ya there

just some ideas mac

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Taz, tending bar, as always has an ear open for troublemakers.

He overhears:
What nest o' scalliwags is this?? Barkeep. A tankard o' grog!!

But he ignores the insult - after all the poor man has only one good eye! He even fills the bar order! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon9.gif


Next he hears:
Wench, more ale!

Well that obviously can't be directed at him...
...and is that a wooden leg he sees on the pirate? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...s/rolleyes.gif

Taz gives the ale to a FBW to be delivered to the rather rude customer.


Taz can't believe his ears when the customer next says:
In fact, that barkeep over thar reminds me o' me second wife.

Bad eye or not, Taz decides that even a pirate cripple must learn SOME manners! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon8.gif

Looking around quickly, Taz spots a ship-in-a-bottle and grabs it off the shelf. Taking his all-purpose ACME ray gun from beneath the bar, Taz then advances on the rude pirate.

Taz sets the ray gun to the shrink setting and fires on the pirate...

ZZZAAAAPPPPP!!!! Whoooshh!

The pirate is shrunken into a tiny minature of himself and is carefully placed on the ship-in-the-bottle.

Taz then pours the pirate's drink carefully into the bottle, setting the tiny ship afloat on its own little sea of ale.

Firmly corking the bottle shut, the Pirate-on-a-ship-in-a-bottle is placed on the bar for the education/entertainment of the other customers. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Wow, that pirate-on-a-ship-in-a-bottle is a real novelty! You can even simulate some very stormy seas by rocking the bottle back and forth. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif Pirates don't get seasick, do they?

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Edit: oops, double post.

So... has anybody figured out the mystery word?
Mu****oms

[ January 08, 2004, 06:42: Message edited by: Kamog ]

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

<font size="2" face="sans-serif, arial, verdana">no, silly, seas do.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

<font size="2" face="sans-serif, arial, verdana">Easy, Mushrooms

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

*Grins as he hears that Renegade eventually spoke aloud the Word You Shall Not Mention* Perhaps it was a bad idea my courageous friend, for *they* were waiting for someone to tell the Word. Now if you will excuse me, I have to go back to my little corner of the bar to watch for the rest of the scene. That will prove to be interesting! *Whistles innocently and goes back to his seat*

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

The patrons at the Bar and Grill don't have to wait too long. The "M" word has been spoken!!

Suddenly a large brown cloud forms over Renegade 13's head. A strong earthy smell fills the bar.

The cloud descends and covers Renegade 13. Suddenly he is covered with many small growths that well up from every part of his body. Within seconds he is covered in many different types of MUSHer -- FUNGUS.

Yes folks there is a Fungus amongst Us.

Renegade 13 starts running around the Bar screaming for help, and flinging bits if "stuff" everywhere.
Taz, seeing a chance to help out, and restock his food stuffs, knocks Renegade to the floor, grabs a large knife and starts cutting away the various growths.

Taz says, "These will go great with fried Tribble wings. I will keep the funny looking "magic" Musher-- Fungus ones for later experimentation."

Finally Taz splashes several rounds of Jack Daniels over Renegade.
Taz says, "There that ought to kill off the rest of the spores."

Renegade staggers toward the Rest room to wash up and get rid of his strong bozzie/earthy smell and flush the Last bits of "stuff" off his body.


Hi Folks. I just thought I would stop in for a quick bite and Pun er Run.

Taz I would like some Tribble Wings with Sautéed Fungus (non magic Please)

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

In the meantime, back in the bottle...

"Yow!!!....raggin', fraggin', paracotta, slaughta' on a farin' corin', slackin' man a".....screams the pirate as he's thrown into the sea of ale...splooooosh. He swims to the boat, scrambles on board, and glances furtively around...

"Great horny toads!! Wait'll I lay my hands on that varmint."

The pirate then snatches two sixguns from his waistband and begins blazing away with cartoon bullets in every direction. The bottle shatters, and the force of the explosion blows the pirate back up to his normal three-foot-six inches, with his unruly shock of fire-red hair and handlebar mustache. Still brandishing the sixguns, he leaps to his feet and says...

"I'm Seagoing Sam, the bloodthirstiest, shootemfirstiest, doggone worstiest buccaneer that's ever sailed the Spanish Main."

Then to the bartender...

"Why, you mangy, fang-toothed critter. I'll keelhaul ya fer this."

[ January 08, 2004, 23:25: Message edited by: Cipher7071 ]

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

will someone please tell me if this link works. It has been over a year now and I would like to see if it still is working and I don't have broad band.

Tis a link to a video. Thanks

SandLake

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Works for me

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Stumbling out of the (very dirty) rest room, Renegade rubs his bleary eyes, and scratchs some hard-to-get-at fungus, and looks around the room, with rage in his eyes. Fixing his fiery glare on Kamog, he slowly advances on the cowardly creature.

"What the f**k was that? Run, run quickly, and pray I never catch you, or your flayed hide shall forever adorn my door."

Kamog scampers for the corner of the bar, whimpering.

"Umm, someone might wanna clean up that mess he left......I didn't think I'd scared him THAT bad."

"Barkeep, give me the rest of that Jack Daniels (ignore the fact that I'm underage http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif ) I think I need a drink after that experience."

"Oh, and by the way.....MUSHROOM!!....MUSHROOM!!....MUSHROOM!!"

(umm, would anyone like to clarify what that was all about? What's with the "M" word?)

[ January 09, 2004, 04:27: Message edited by: Renegade 13 ]

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Well, this goes way back to the old old cantina thread. How it originally started in the very beginning, I don't know because I wasn't around back then. It had something to do with the vegetable gods or something, and I think you were supposed to say 'onions' when you stepped into the cantina, otherwise something bad would happen to you. Maybe somebody else who was there in the beginning could explain it. I remember Fyron putting in his sig, "when in the cantina, Fyron says onions" or something like that.

For some reason that I don't understand, somehow the rule mutated so that now when you say onions, a big pile of onions falls from the ceiling and buries the person who said it. This was the rule in two or three of the cantina threads that came after. It became a sort of traditional thing. The exact effect of saying the word may vary from cantina to cantina.

Well, with this latest Version of the cantina, the magic word has changed to the m-word, with new consequences. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

The wizen old one, looks up as he hears the "O" word mentioned in the sanctum of sanctums, he nervously looks around and immediatly moves his old carcass under the table and nervously watches the area around Kamog.

Kamog who is renditioning to Renegade about various vegtibles has unwittingly mentioned the not to mention "O" word, as he continues to discuss his position, a loud rumbling is heard and the bar shakes to its very foundation. The roof opens up and a gigantic "ONION" descends into the depths of the Bar and Grill, right over Kamog's shaking frame, he looks up, and with that movement the giant ONION opens wide, descending and engulfing Kamog within its fiery inniards, its opening closes and it begins its ascent up thru the roof to what hideious garden only vegtibles know taking Kamog with it.......... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif


There are certain words that are not to be spoken of lightly within the confines of these establishments if you do its at your own risk ..... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/shock.gif

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Enter Narratio.

"Just saw a flying Onion outside! no number plates on it OR FAA ID numbers. Somebody is gonna' be in big trouble! Bartender, I'll have a beer and a shot...

Forget about the shot, I'll just lick Renegade dry."

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

<font size="2" face="sans-serif, arial, verdana">Taz looks around at the newly freed and regrown pirate. His massive face lights up and he shows off the mentioned 8 inch Fangs.

"Why didn't you say that you were THAT Sam! Why any enemy of that 'Bugs' rabbit is a friend of mine!!"

With that said, Taz grabs Sam's hand and proceeds to shake it. VERY enthusiastic!
After a few moments Taz places a now slightly over-shaken Sam on the plushest Bar Seat available and gives him a giant-sized mug of the best Ale on Taz's tab.!
"Just a minute Sam - I have to tend the bar some."

Taz quickly fills Renegade's order, get a cold one for Mac(to settle his nerves!), and places a large display of Fungus Remover where the bar patrons can have easy access to it.

"OK, Sam old pal, where were we?..."

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Oh, no! How could I have been so dumb! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon8.gif

As the big flying vegetable zips erratically across the sky, Kamog is brutally battered around against the interior walls. He desperately tries to hold onto something, but alas, the walls are smoothly curved. Kamog's eyes start watering from the foul vapors oozing from the moist inner surfaces, and to make matters worth, it's getting harder and harder to breathe. In desperation, he claws ineffectually at the walls.

Help! Somebody shoot this thing down, or something! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/blush.gif

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Just as he was about to continue his conversation with Sam, Taz is distracted by Kamog's shouts...

'Well he is a regular customer' Thinks Taz

Taking the Slicer-dicer machine from the kitchen, Taz attaches it to a rocket and shoots it off to the distressed bar patron.

There you go Kamog; and could you get me some 'O' Rings to go with the Tribble Wings?
Thanks! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Thank you, Taz! I was in quite a predicament! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif

With a loud thud, the vegetable hits the ground, splitting up into hundreds of O-shaped slices. Standing in the middle is the bruised and beaten-up Kamog, miraculously untouched by the sharp slicer-dicer blades.

Kamog takes the rings, stacks them up neatly, and carries the pile to the kitchen.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Hmmm, the tuxedo clad, 12 inch fanged, hugely clawed Growltigga ponders on the re-emergence of the evil O and M words.

I wonder if this will work for other things.

Standing in the middle of the floor, Growltigga looks hopefully up at the ceiling and shouts "cheerleaders".

Nothing happens.

He then shouts, "dancing girls". Nothing happens.

He then shouts, "pole dancers".

The cantina shakes as a dozen moustachioed pantaloon clad blokes fall out of the ceiling, proceed to start up some daft looking polka, and proceed to chase the cantina patrons round the floor.

Taz, Sam, do something for cripes sake.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Hey, This is fun.

Let's try another word:

Morris Dancers http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif

The primitive one returns to his silent corner, enjoying the look of panic on the ferocious felines face when a large troup of Morris Dancers drops from the ceiling.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

AARRGGGHHHHHH, Growltigga reaches behind the bar, and grabs out his trusty saw toothed scimitar, and lays into the bearded folksy prancing mincing handerchief be-decked sad old tosspots with a will.

Pig's bladders, handerchiefs, intestines, blood and severed heads and silly straw bonnets are sprayed all over the cantina as the great kat does unto those bloody morris dancers what the sodomites did to each other, but this time with a 4 foot long saw toothed evil looking scimitar...

AHH ARRHH AHH AHHH AHH finally, the Last morris dancer is disembowelled, decapitated and shredded, the cat stands in the middle of a gory pile of innards and is sprayed in blood.

Next?

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Tracing the rune of protection with his index finger on his Rusty (yet pointy) Spear™, Primitive goes again:

Invuln…., Invoulne…, Invulnra…., Eh: Really hard to kill Morris Dancers.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

More of the wretched beardy weirdy failed social worker/mathmaticians fall from the ceiling.

Tigga lays into them again with his sword, the end result is the same, it just takes longer.

THe pile of gore gets bigger, but now it is topped off by a knackered accordian wheezing out the Last notes of "Mrs Widgery's Lodger".

Hmmm thinks the kat, time to hunt Norwegians and see if I can stick that rusty (yet pointy) spear where the sun dont shine

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

<font size="2" face="sans-serif, arial, verdana">Despite the quality did it look ok, sound ok? (?)

What did you think?

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Atrocites,
I have a cable connection. It ran fine. I could hear the sound clearly.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Thar..."Maybe that'll learn ya to keep your big mouth shut," says Sam to the room, doing a quick cartoon-change out of the pirate costume, and donning his ten-gallon hat.

Forget about what I said a while ago, thar Taz.
Can't say I blame yuh fer not recognizin' me in that pirate getup. "Say, I like you, you're a good joe."

He swallows down about half the huge mug of ale in a single gulp, then rather loudly breaks wind in another, smaller, brown cloud.

Yuh know, "pickins is mighty slim 'round here, hardly any reward for a day's work. Why, it's getting so a man can't earn a dishonest livin' no more."

[ January 09, 2004, 14:54: Message edited by: Cipher7071 ]

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

:: Steps into the rather discusting place :: Looks to the ceilling ::
Auto Matic Micro Nano Bot Room Cleaners
:: Steps back as thousands fall from the ceilling and in in minutes clean the place up and put a polish on it too then coagualte into a large sclupture of the Gryphin in the Gryphin position with Pooh Star.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Narratio, still sitting at bar while things descend to the usual level of chaos finishes his beer and signals for a refill.

He wonders what the rest of the floor show will bring. Greenpeace basket weavers? Ninja flower arrangers? Harikrishna acolytes presenting poisened flowers?

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Gryphin, I can't seem to get an email thru to you, email me your new address.

just some ideas mac

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

<font size="2" face="sans-serif, arial, verdana">Thanks http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif


<font color=purple>NOW PEOPLE GO SIGN UP YOUR NAME IN THE </font> Member System Names thread.

[ January 10, 2004, 17:11: Message edited by: Atrocities ]

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Nice vid Atrocities, for some reason the words "Sanctuary on Sand" came to mind. The music and vid had an 'escapism' feeling to it. (like to 'get away from it all') Know what I mean?

Anyway, it was fun, Cheers! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Mac, (or anybody)
gryph
at
windingsteam
dot
com

Think the spiders will find that addy?

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

mac,
I have an applicantfor FBW:
http://www.windingstream.com/us/corsettenl.htm
What do the denizens here think?

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Gryph, don't know why but my email to you won't go thru for some reason.

anyway wanted to ask you more about the Empire Delux game, I used to play it on the old atari and enjoyed it. wanted to get the particulars on the game and site setup. Email me with the info if you would pls. tks

just some ideas Mac

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

<font size="2" face="sans-serif, arial, verdana">Thanks David. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif It was a great trip, a lot of fun, and very relaxing. It was also two years ago, I need another soon. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Atrocities, you're a Star Trek Fan right? have you ever been to this site..

5 Minute Voyager

It's all about short parodies of each ST episode. It has sections for every series, ToS, TNG, DS9, Vgr, and much more.

Cheers! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif

[ January 11, 2004, 12:00: Message edited by: David E. Gervais ]

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Does anyone know if the game Rise of Nations is any good? Thought about buying it but thought I'd ck around lst... Did get Korsun Pocket and currently looking it over. looks good

just some ideas Mac

[ January 12, 2004, 02:21: Message edited by: mac5732 ]

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Mac did you get my email about EDIE?

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

If you have a Nvidia video card, hold off on Rise of Nations. The latest drivers for those cards make things flicker.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

<font size="2" face="sans-serif, arial, verdana">Thanks for the link, I will check it out. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Any one remember a paridy of Star Wars named TROOPERS?

It was like COPS, but based on Star Wars?

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

thanks Phoenix D, I do have Nivda GeoForce 4x agp graphic card, I'll hold off, do you know if they are going to patch it?

Gryphin Yes, I already cked the site out, tks, don't know why I'm having trouble with the email, maybe its their site

just some ideas Mac

[ January 12, 2004, 04:12: Message edited by: mac5732 ]

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Mac, it really is a grate game and Empire Deluxe Enhanced Edition will be even greater.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Rise of Nations is a great game, a lot like Empire Earth meets Age of Empires meets Risk.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Yeah, troopers was great. I cant remember the name of the site, think it was penny theater or something like that.. but it had all sorts of short fan films and movie parody stuff.

along with Troopers, they had Thumb Wars, which was a remake of starwars but with peoples thumbs as the actors.

Re: Forum Chat Bar & Grill
 

Oh brother. you've just reminded me of an old Mad Magazine parody of Star Trek from the sixties. I can't quite seem to remember the name of the strip, but it featured "Captain Quirk," and "Mr. Spook." It was pretty funny.