Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

I just had a generous helping of Beans, Italian Saussage, Eggs and Cheeze, and I now have gas. But that's alright, I'll fit right in here at FartPoint. I just hope that the air filtering pumps don't get damaged.

http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/tongue.gif

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Post 200, end of "Encounter at Fart Point"

Da deeeee dah dah dah dah dah dahhhhhhh
cue sight of TSSS PHong's Head zipping past the screen very fast
cue credits and still pictures of the following

Captain Growltigga in combat suit looking heroic
Mac and GT watching the clones naked mud wrestling brawl
Commander Power Man fighting the rats
Taz drunk and fast asleep on bunk
Growltigga issuing orders on bridge
another picture of the clones fighting
Mr S'Katchoo barbecuing on the bridge
Captain Growltigga looking clever and intelligent
Mr Dogscoff being assaulted by the aging hookers
Gryphin looking at his cleavage in amazement

end credits.... cue adverts, cue trailer for the next episode......

"Space, the final frontier..... these are the voyages of the TSSS Phong's Head, on its 5 year mission to boldly go boldly where no bold man has gone before boldly...."

PS in true Star Trek style, I think we need an episode where we worry about the personal problems of one of the crew, rather than kill aliens and all that...

how about an episode revolving round Mr Power Man's haemmoroids?

[ May 13, 2003, 18:08: Message edited by: growltigger ]

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

episode two will include narf's revenge and a big fight with barry. in the meantime,

all the rat bones, being toons, move around, attach themselves together and stalk off backstage.

next episode, maybe pet snakes?

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Pooh Star is even more amazed at my cleavage.

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

For episode two, why not "Skatchoo's Brain" ? It does begin with an encounter with an unknown ship full of young women...

...It's also supposed to be the worst Star Trek episode of all time. I'd say it's perfect for us.

You can find the episode synopsis here.

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

i liked the way at the end spock was telling mccoy if what he had done worked.

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Wow, I don't think i've ever seen that episode before... Although after reading the synopsis I can understand why it would suck http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif

We could mix the episode with that Steve Martin movie with all the transplanted brains?

Frankly, any episode where I don't have to hide my constant drooling problem would be fine with me.

http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/tongue.gif

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

The silliest thing about that episode was Scotty not knowing how there could possibly be light underground when there's no sun. The Chief Engineer has no clue what a light bulb is.

The other dumb thing was the remote control McCoy made to control Spock's body. It has about 4 buttons that have functions which are something like this: (1) walk forward (2) stop (3) turn right (4) grapple with nearby humanoid and take away their weapon.

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Lets have an episode where everybody gets cloned and gets fused with each other in an transporter accident.

We'll call it Skatnarf.

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

lets not.

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

How about the episode where the Captain falls in love with a female alien? (Yeah, just like every episode.) Or the one where there's a planet exactly like earth, but it is run by Romans or gangsters or Nazis or something? Or the one where the ship goes back in time by flying around the sun really fast? Or the one where everybody gets some alien disease which causes them to either mutate or grow old or act crazy? Or the one where there's a parallel universe in which the alternate crew members have beards and they're evil?

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Ahh, the Wizened Old Mac, sits back and continues to watch the ahem, gyrations etc, of the clones of Episode one. He replays the film footage over and over again..... Ah the Tigga definitly knows how to close out a chapter... oh ya he mutters as a LH clone puts a Britney Spears clone in a most revealing position of seduction.... (sweat pours from Mac's torso and he reaches for his defibulator switch to turn up the power http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif ) he continues to watch as he waits for the next episode to begin

In addition he looks on with amazement at the Gryphins "new additions" http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/shock.gif and he wonders how they will get along with his Pseudo-life form symbiot wooly bear which lives upon his upper lip.
hopefully the poor little thing won't become confused to the point he starts radiating or oozing some type of secreation or puts on a new Custer hat http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Cap'n, we're all waitin' here for ye ta roll the opening credits for the episode of yer choice.

Taz, send me a beer and a haggis sandwich for while I wait.

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

I like the idea of seeing you lot sporting goatee beards (I already have one- does that make me evil?) so I have unilaterally decreed that the next episode shall be:
Minger, Minger

Here's the episode we're sending up, and for the colonially-challenged, here is a definition of the word "minger". (It's pronounced to rhyme with "winger", not "ginger".)

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Can we chose to be the Good or the Bad Version?

It will be just the girls that are ugly right??

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

there is only one narf. any non-narf's in blue suits will be hammered on sight.

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

We get to be in whichever universe where the girls are pretty, right?

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Spock's Brain was bad, but I think the worst one I ever saw was the one where Kirk got body snatched by the female scientist. Remember this was during the 60's. That episode was so bad it set the women's lib movement back decades and by some accounts was directly responsioble for the failure of the passage of the ERA amendment. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif

Watching Bill Shatner pretending to be a woman was just disturbing. [shudder]

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Another really bad one was the one where Spock is overcome by urges and he has to return to Vulcan. It turns out that Vulcans live in a rather primitive way on their planet even though they are supposed to be so advanced technologically. Spock and Kirk have to go through this ritual combat to the death, and there's the usual unconvincingly dramatic fight scene.

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

OT for just a sec. anyone here going to Origins in Columbus, Oh, in June? Shrapnel is going to have a booth there, just wondering, I'll probably go as its only a 2hr drive

just some ideas Mac

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Taz reluctantly dons his Guinen outfit and resumes his duties in Ten Forward.

Ordered by Erax: A beer and a Haggis sandwich.

Taz serves Erax the beer and (Ugg) his Haggis sandwich.
"Do you know what is in that? How about a nice plate of Tribble Wings instead?" http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif

What is a haggis: http://www.electricscotland.com/haggis/haggis1.html

As Taz waits for the next episode to begin, he pulls out a rag and begins to polish the bar...

[ May 15, 2003, 05:58: Message edited by: Taz-in-Space ]

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

lol. and i thought it was oatmeal in a sheeps stomach!

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

End opening credits and still shots of heroic Captain Growltigga looking macho and well, just plain heroic.....

Camera pans left to shot of TSSS Phong's Head zipping along through space (if you look closely enough, you can see the wires)....

Captain Slog, Stardate 13.01.15.05.03 GMT, despite our entente cordial and mutual appreciation of the female clone mud-wrestling-wet-look-nude-all-in-wahey-event, I have been unable to convince the Fart Point Council to allow the Galactic Federation to mine dilithium crystals on their planet, but I have been successful in securing galaxy-wide distribution rights for "Old Regurgitator", their strongest and finest ale. That's the pension sorted out anyway...

However, when we were beamed back to Phong's Head, I noticed a slight fault in our transporter system, possibly caused by the methane storms surrounding Fart Point...

The crew of the Phong's Head are strange, for a start, everybody has stupid goatee beards, even the girls, and my first officer, always a bit of an effete ponce, is now walking round flexing his biceps (for what it is worth) and acting like a right pratt.. I am worried that the transporter problem has beamed us to another dimension where the crew of the Phong's Head are a bunch of strange tee-totla pacificts and mincing queens.. also, every body seems to have ginger hair.. I might have to rename the ship the TSSS Ginger Minger at this rate...

Something must be up, I am sure that the transporter man blew my first officer a kiss when we beamed up, there doesn't appear to be a real man (or real woman) for that matter in the whole crew

I have asked the away team to investigate......

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

(Let me officially declare my displeasure at the choice of topics for this episode. But beign a dedicated professional fake actor I will do my best to play the role as written. But I expect you will be hearing from my agent at contract renewel time. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif )

[comunicator beep]
Mccoy: Yoooo-hoooo! Captain Gt! You big stud cat you. I heard you had returned from your away mission. Now you get tail down to sick bay pronto handsome. I need to do a complete physical exame on you and make sure you didn't pick up any nasty alien bugs. I'm waaaiting.......

[ May 15, 2003, 13:53: Message edited by: geoschmo ]

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">I know all about haggis, in fact in Brazil we have a similar dish except it's a goat instead of a sheep.

Anyway...

Erax looks at his console in Engineering and sees
a blinking light. "What the... Transporters are doon ? Gotta fix that !" He dives into the ship's innards and finds a bundle of components that have been duct-taped together. "Curse that Kamog and his tape !" He jiggles the components and a loud beeping alarm is heard. He comes out, kills the alarm, turns off Transporter power and goes back in again.

'I hope no one was using the Transporters right just now', he thinks to himself.

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

meanwhile, back in the normal dimension, the anti-dogscoff has materialised aboard the real TSSS Phong's Head. Shagged out after an eventful away-trip, he heads to the bar.

"If I may ask, sir, how is it you have 2 goatees?" inquires a passing crewman.
Before anti-dogscoff can answer, the crewman accidentally spills beer all over him.

For a moment, anti-'scoff just looks at the spilled mess. Then he looks back up at the crewman. The crewman quivers and starts to apologise.
"Don't worry about it" says anti-dogscoff "I've got to get changed anyway. But first let me mop this up for you.

The crewman is amazed. "Aren't you going to feed me to Barry or some kind of hideous, city-devouring sea-monster? Or have me hacked into millions of tiny pieces from the inside by a horde of beserk micro-ninja?"
Anti-dogscoff just laughs. "No, No. Here, let me buy you another drink, although you really shouldn't drink beer- alcohol is very bad for you. How about a nice herbal tea instead?"

The crewman calls for security...

[ May 15, 2003, 16:05: Message edited by: dogscoff ]

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Well beam me up Scotty.
How do one finds 10 forward here to get some free drinks?

Ruatha looks around with the view that has seen more than 1000 Posts pass by. An experianced person these days!

Aint I great or what?? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...s/rolleyes.gif

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

so the real phong's head is the evil one? make sence. now lets see...

narf, after interviewing a few citicens of fartpoint, learns about what happened to most of his rats. taking of an the trail of his rats, he draws steadily closer to the phong's head, who's rampage he is determined to stop.

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

*As the Phongs Head is travelling along 5 cloaked Deadstar Continuum Battleships materialise surrounding the Phong's Head. They move into intercept positions and open fire, with the combined fire of all 5 ships shield depleters the Phong's heads shields are left low, if not destroyed. On Board the Captain Leyasu receives his orders and prepares to give his proposal to the crew...*

*The Phong's Head's viewscreen bursts into colour as a Deadstar Captain appears on it, looking very evil, he looks around at the bemused crew of the phong's head and notices the strange looking man with the goatee standing before him. The captain looks around, no sign of the captain Jean Luc Le Grand Chat. Just someone who looks like a non-sentient lifeform, well with that GOATEE It seemed he was, and why did he look like he had something shoved up his back hole?.*

"Greetings TSSS Phongs Head, I captain Leyasu of the Deadstar demand you remove your ship from Claimed Deadstar space. Failure to do so shall result in the swift destruction of your ship. You have 1 day to comply or you will be annexed! Refuse and prepare the caskets for your arrival!"

*The Viewscreen knocks off and the entire crew of good looking gothic women burst into hysterics of the sight of the first officer with the goatee. The video is saved and sent around the deadstar continuum to be displayed as propaganda against the enemy, for now the galactic federation has been resoundingly humiliated. With the 5 cruisers tri cobalt torpedoes locked on they await the first officers decision!*

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

narf reaches the phong's head and begins to bang on the cargo bay door with a hammer. the doors bulge inward and split, narf goes inside, and a forcefield generated by the phongs head snaps into place behind him. narf starts heading towards a door, then a tyrranosaurus kicks him in the side. narf slams against the wall and drops into a crouch. grasping his hammer tightly, he slams the tyranno in the side, knocking 30 feet it into a wall. the t-rex, only shaken up, charges...

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Let's stop a minute and see where everyone is.

We have the Captain and Scoffo on the Minger Phong and the Minger Scoffo and presumably the Minger Captain on the original Phong. Erax is on the original Phong, but I will also play Minger Erax in the Minger Universe as needed. (play both your characters, get twice the fun the price of one !)

Narf is on the original Phong, about to become a snack for Barry (I don't even want to THINK what Minger Barry looks like). http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/shock.gif

RD may be attacking either Phong.

Power Man and Taz were on the away team, they are probably in the Minger Universe.

OK, back to the show...

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

snack? i don't think so. just as soon as i get back, that t-rex doesn't stand a chance.

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

reserved. brain fried.

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

The computer is reading a damaged door in cargo bay 2...

Kamog goes down to investigate, his handy roll of Duct Tape in hand. ...Hey, what's that tyrannasaurus rex doing in the cargo bay?? No problem, take this! - uh, oh, where's my hand phaser? (Checks his utility belt - no luck.)

Kamog goes to the control panel on the wall and touches some buttons. The huge cargo bay door starts to open, and there's a sudden rush of air blowing out into space. Some cargo containers fly out into open space, and the T-rex is sucked against the opening. Kamog grabs Commander Narf and quickly pulls him out of the Cargo Bay.

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Taz/Guinen in Ten Forward has noticed something is different since he came back to the ship - for one thing almost nobody is ordering any alcoholic drinks! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...s/confused.gif
However trade is Brisk on tea. Same goes for lemonade and Sarsaparilla. And (horrors) is that coffee being served to Ensign Starbuck? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/shock.gif

Another funny thing is all those goatees everybody has on. Even a few of the women are sporting them. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon9.gif
And somebody just asked ME why I shaved mine off!
A goatee on a TAZ?? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...s/rolleyes.gif

Taz decides to wait a little and see what else might be a 'little funny!' http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/tongue.gif

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Back on the real TSSS Phong's Head, the bridge is silent as they gave at the viewscreen showing the scrappy Deadstar warships...

The doors to the captain's ready room open and minging Captain Jean Luc Le Pouffe Celebre sidles out onto the bridge, wearing a ginger goatee beard, an all in one lycra shipsuit, earrings and clutching, for some strange reason, a bunch of daffodils..

"ooooh, dont shoot at us again you nasty man" says the fey mincing ladyboy, "we are leaving deadstar space right away, Mr Helmsman, ooh your nice, come to my briefing room later, I mean, set course for starbase 5, warp 3 (I dont like going any faster, it ruffles my nasal hairs), engage"

The TSSS Phong's Head performs a nippy looking U turn, engine nacelles fire up and it zips off into the stars, leaving Fart Point to the mercy of the Deadstar Continuumumumum....

Back on the TSSS Ginger Minger, the real Captain Growltigga is having a bit of a mare, he cannot find a single drop of booze on the damn ship, and to make things worse, when he asked the pretty young engineering ensign with the large zero gravity ghazoobas to come to the reasy room, the poor ginger moron freaked out and feinted.. "Damn" thins the Captain, "this ship is meant to be the party capital of the galaxy, as well as the meanest starship to boot, something strange is going on, there must have been a transporter error which beamed us into another dimension where everybody is a tee total ginger bearded pacifist, I must get engineering sorted out"

Captain to the non-ginger Versions of Commander Dogscoff, Mr Power Man and Guinan/Taz - please report to my ready room, please bring your phaser pistols, some pLastic explosive and a baseball bat with a few 6 inch nails banged through it

PS Note to Kamog, when I get back to the real dimension, you are going to get royally whipped, abused and demoted - NOBODY and I MEAN NOBODY spaces Barry the T Rex.

Are you not aware that Barry is our head of security aboard the Phong's Head, but because he weighs 12 tons and is 60 foot long, he has to live in the cargo bay???!!!! Narf is a rodent like alien invader and should therefore be phasered on sight, not invited on board, rescued and promoted to "Commander"!! ooohh, are you going to get the worst I can think of!

[ May 16, 2003, 08:40: Message edited by: growltigger ]

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

The real dogscoff reports to the transporter room for a debriefing from the Captain. As 'Tig explains the parallel universe situation, 'scoff comes to an interesting conclusion...

"So there is a parallel universe where everyone I know exists, but has a beard and a totally different personality.
I wonder what other universes are out there, waiting to be discovered?"

Dogscoff looks at the transporter.

"Somewhere, there must be a universe where entire planets are made of beer. And one where I am undisputed Emporer of the Galaxy. And one where the only item of female attire permissible is a thin, virtually transparent coating of strawberry jam..."

Dogscoff immediately begins adjusting various switches and sliders, re-configuring the transporter for inter-dimensional travel.

[ May 16, 2003, 09:48: Message edited by: dogscoff ]

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Captain Jean Luc Le Grand Chat, actually terrified for once at what Commander Dogscoff's inept fumblings may do, pulls out his trusty phaser, sets it to "max sting" and shoots Commander Dogscoff in the buttocks...

"Stop that you idiot" shouts the burly heroic captain "we want to get back to our proper dimension, not fumble round other dimensions which could we worse than this one.. given the appalling gingerness and minginess of the crew of this ship, imagine what our useless counterparts are getting up on the Phong's Head! by god, they could be running away from Deadstar ponces, abusing each other and banning alcohol on the ship! get a grip man, we have to return but if it makes you feel better, I shall see what can be done about enforcing a "thin layer of strawberry jam" only uniform on board (for the girls only I stress), Taz, you are the only sensible one on this away team, double check the transporter and let us beam ourselves bacvk to where we belong"

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Minger Erax wanders into the transporter room just as Taz and the Captain are about to start readjusting the controls and nearly spills his banana-flavored hot chocolate.

"Oooh sorry Captain, I didn't know you were in here, you nearly killed me."

He then notices what the two of them are up to.

"Let me do that, please, it took ages for me to set up a pretty personalized desktop on the transporter panel, with cute animals and everything. Now what was it that you wanted ?"

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

:: Looks down at my cleavage ::
I would like to get back to my former dimensions too.
Doc, that is enough "testing" of my Chest. Go malest one of the nurses.

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Power Man is a bit dazed by the rough Beam Back. He can’t seem to find his way to the bridge. It is all most like this is a different ship !!
He finally makes it back to his post.
He is surprised by what he finds. The controls are all Wrong! The ship speeds are Slow, Mince, Swish, Prance, Skip, and Scurry Away !!
The phaser settings are Warm, Fuzzy, Tickle, Pinch, and Slap !!
“I don’t even want to Think what the settings are for the PEE tube.”

Taking out his Comm unit Power Man calls the Captain. Captain Growltigga something is Not Right here.

I just heard a message from the FCC. (taken by the Comm Oficer who is being played by a PLastic Blow up Man with a silly goatee.) You have been ordered to secure the mining rights from “Those Old Farts” by noon tomorrow. If not you are ordered to “just Tickle them till it hurts.”

I will meet you in your Ready room. I have my phaser Captain. But all I can find around here is Silly Putty and pLastic Wiffel Ball Bats. They only have 6 inch Fake Finger Nails !!

(Sorry folks but I have had a few (Real Life) problems come up and may be only a “supporting character” for this episode. I will try to keep up with the story and chime in when I can. )

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

narf asks kamog about his rats. kamog, being helpfull, tells him about his rats. narf, being nice in thanks for the information, uses knockout gas, since as far as he knows kamog didn't do anything to his rats. he then proceeds down the cooridor, knocking random crewmen into disks. and narf is not a rat. narf sells pet rats. and pinky is a mouse. my cantina avatar is a guy in a blue suit.

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Going back into Cargo Bay 2, Kamog notices the T-rex still caught in the bay doors. Uh, oh, I can't close the doors now because that would crush the dinosaur. I know, I'll use the transporter to move him into Cargo Bay 1.

Kamog runs to Cargo Bay 1, clears a large area in the center of the room, and hits some buttons on the transporter control panel. The T-rex disappears from Cargo Bay 2... and a bearded Barry appears in Cargo Bay 1. What? What's going on? I'm sure he didn't have a beard a minute ago... oh, well, whatever.

Kamog goes to 10 Forward to have dinner. ... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/shock.gif There's something different about the waitresses today... why do all the Kylie Clone FBW's have goatees now? Ugh!

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Posted by Growltigger:
<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">As Taz is about to follow orders he is interrupted by Minger Erax. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon8.gif
Even a Taz has his limits and when M-Erax turns away to sip his hot chocolate; Taz breaks out his trusty gyroscope-equipped titanium-coated baseball bat and whacks M-Erax with it!

Satisfied that M-Erax will be counting stars for some time to come, Taz proceeds to fix the #%&*! transporter.
First that desktop theme has got to go. Taz considers using the bat once again, but settles for resetting the system to win-doze standard...
...Some time later Taz reports to the captain that the transporter is ready to go. (And Taz MORE than ready to go...)

Oh, and I have set remote beam-out for Power Man who reported to your ready room (as ordered) instead of meeting you here! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

must use better knockout gas next time.

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

In 10 Forward, Kamog sits down and orders a pizza. When the Kylie Clone FBW comes around to his table... "Hmm, that beard can't be real", Kamog thinks to himself. He reaches out and tugs on FBW's goatee. It doesn't come off. The angry FBW spins around and swiftly lands a devastating karate kick on Kamog's stomach, and Kamog is thrown clear across the room, hitting a brick wall (which is there for some reason). Pieces of brick go flying in all directions, and as Kamog crumples to the floor, a nice crater-like imprint is left on the wall.

...The badly bruised Kamog slowly gets up and limps away to sick bay. Ow ow ow, I hope I haven't broken any bones...

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

...Time in this Minger dimension must be variable. It seems like over two days has gone by since I FIXED THE TRANSPORTER... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...s/rolleyes.gif

[ May 19, 2003, 04:29: Message edited by: Taz-in-Space ]

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

*Captain Leyasu quickly looks around his attractive crew, stopping at the wepaons officer who he finds extremely attractive. He suddenly snaps out of the trance and watches as the Real Jean Luc Le grand Chat bursts onto the bridge with his crew and begins a full phaser fight. Mnay of the red shirt ensigns take sides with the captain they believe is true. (Well think about it, GT has orange fur! A ginger beard won't show up to well, so it's mainly the short sighted ensigns, though they probably have better aim than your average red shirt)
Leyasu notices the end is coming and Jean Luc le Grand Chat commanding someone to fire the Torpedoes! Leyasu quickly orders the ships to retreat leaving the battle harden woemn upset and the ones who want to live a couple of days more pleased. The five anathema battlecruisers quickly cloak and disappear leaving behind them a couple of mines equipped with giant explosive boxing gloves as a leaving present as they hit warp 5 and bLast off towards the borders of Deadstar space!*

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

narf takes off with his rats.
(narf go by-by. yeah, your making the sensitive christian uncomfortable.)

[ May 19, 2003, 21:56: Message edited by: narf poit chez BOOM ]

Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
 

Power Man is happy to be back on the correct Phong’s Head. (It is the correct one? Right Captain??).
Taking out his phaser he goes “In Search Of “ the Pansy power man.
He is found hiding in the WC.

“OH MY!! His suit is a wimpy paisley blue with hot pink stripes. “

Pansy power man cries out: “Don’t hurt me. I want to go home. This ship is Nasty. The controls are wrong, the turbolifts are mean, everyone laughs at my goatee, and I can’t find my way around……

SLAP SLAP The Real Power Man says, “There that shut him/me up. “

The real Power Man bundles the pansy up and takes him to the transporter.
Before Power Man sends him back he tells the pansy, ”Your Federation is doomed to End in ruin.
If you wise up and stop being such a pansy you can save yourself and the Federation.
One Man can make a difference. Be That Man!” Get rid of those silly pink stripes.
As he is beamed back the pansy says he will “sleep on it”.

Power Man returns to the Bridge. Captain I have returned the ginger bearded pansy power man to his ship.
Sitting down at the controls Power Man sets the ships phasers to “sweep” and destroys the mine “presents” that were left by the Deadstar ships.

Captain I think I can get the course those ships were on when they cloaked. Our “eagle eye” scanners were still on. They were able to track them as they left.

(By the Way Taz I really like your new avatar.)