Re: MultiDimensional B&G/Cantina thread
 

Re: MultiDimensional B&G/Cantina thread
 

I hereby create the Movement for the Valorisation of Puke. If you too want to show your appreciate of Puke, download the picture attached to this post and start spreading it around. Puke deserves four stars out of four!

And now I will let my friend and associate RD lecture you on why Puke should get four stars (he is quite good with propaganda actually, and I am feeling lazy. Guess which reason was the more important?).

Looks like editing when previewing a post destroys the attachment.

Re: MultiDimensional B&G/Cantina thread
 

Re: MultiDimensional B&G/Cantina thread
 

Turin, not normally a "frequenter" of pubs and the like, cautiously peeks his head in the door of the establishment of ill-repute. Noticing the soaking wet scantily clad fillies roaming around with pitchers of brew, he happily takes a seat near the stage and considers changing his entertainment persuits.

"Eeww... what did I just sit in? Is this cake? Aww... it's all over my soord and evrytheen..."

Re: MultiDimensional B&G/Cantina thread
 

RD scribbles down some notes, puts on his Minister of Misinformation uniform and stands at the bar, clearing his throat.

"Why Puke is a Vomitous Pile we Should Support.

Well, Needless to say, he’s a sentient pile of vomit capable of self-propulsion, complex thought, appreciation of the finer thing’s in life, speech and somehow able to, despite his rather unseemly form, come across as a far more civilised cultured being than most humans. With a healthy Violent streak found in all successful races. Almost impervious to harm unless his entire form is destroyed, far more skilled at hunting and survival than most species and in his current state enough to challenge even the A-Morph Schlock species.

Outstanding achievements for something commonly found after a Kebab and far too many Alcoholic Beverages. As Puke, he is beyond and above the Food Chain!

A skilled Ambassador able to disguise his forked tongue in grand machiavellian schemes and machinations, bringing races together from all over the galaxy. (and Not by making someone hold a girls hair back as she calls the Porcelain phone.)

The resident Loveable Rogue of the cantina, to date perhaps the most self-depreciating in his replies and certainly up their with Growltigger in creative comebacks and Wit. A formidable opponent in the field of cartoon violence.

This may not impress you, and I wish not to further praise the modest man, I'm unaware how his kind express Emabarassment. So I must ask. Could you do the same as a Pile of Sentient Vomit? I think not…"

RD get's back on with serving at the bar...
(Hope that was ok for a off-the-cuff speech)

Re: MultiDimensional B&G/Cantina thread
 

Agent Zero hangs his head in shame at having been outdone by a puddle of puke. Remorsefully, he aims his Pie Gun at his temple and fires. High velocity custard splatters everywhere.
"Hey, that was actually kinda fun!"
Patrons arriving a few mintues later can only stand and stare in bewilderment at the six-foot high pile of custard that's giggling in the corner.

Re: MultiDimensional B&G/Cantina thread
 

i hate you, oh so much.

Re: Former Chat Bar & Grill
 

Strategia approaches AZ giggling in his pile of custard in the corner.

"Can I try it?"

Re: Former Chat Bar & Grill
 

[i]Two holes appear near the top of the custard pile and Agent Zero peers out from his custard fortress. Several attempts are made at communication, all failures (it's hard to talk with a mouth full of custard). The custard pile then shrugs in resignation (if such a thing is possible), and a third hole appears in the pile.

The Pie-Gun Clatters.

Patrons entering the Bar are now dismayed to discover that there are now two piles of custard giggling in the corner.

Re: Former Chat Bar & Grill
 

That was well done RD; I guess I owe you one now, so I will do my best to repay you the favour at once. Debts are best not kept, as you certainly know. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

"The Most Incredible Cantina, the Place where all Connoisseurs should go,

Have you ever believed your life lacked something, some sort of wildness that would allow you to reach happiness? The Cantina is one such place, and you will certainly not forget your stay within its walls. Have you been looking for an entertaining bar, far different from the mundane places you can find everywhere? The Cantina is one such place, where labels such as "boring" or "commonplace" could not be farther from the truth.

You may have been to the Restaurant at the End of the Universe, and found the whole spectacle to be barely worth a yawn. You will be delighted to learn the Cantina hosts the Riders of the Apocalypse, so you will have first hand knowledge of the end of the world. Where those Pangalatic drinks (whose name I have forgotten, as usual. Garglebuster I think) refreshing, but definitively lacking in taste? The brewskies of the Cantina are the finest in the whole universe, and are certainly something to write home about.

The Cantina does catter to all tastes: if you would like a more risky ride, you should figure out the following riddle, and yell the answer in the Cantina: "What is the word you obtain if you switch two letters in 'Mushromo'?" Or perhaps you should do that riddle with "Orino" instead, as the Cantina is an unpredictable place: such is its charm, as you never know what will befall on you once you get inside the Cantina.

This was barely a sample of all the pleasures the Cantina has to offer: I have made no mention yet of the remarkable display of various museum items, or the exhibition of the only sentient Puke (no guarantees are made regarding sapience, however, but it should be featured as well). And last but definitively not least, you will be attended at all times by the finest waitresses in the world, the fabled FBW!

What are you waiting for? This is a "once-in-a-lifetime" opportunity of changing your life; you will never look at the universe in quite the same way after you have been in the Cantina. Give this flyer to the bartender for a free drink of your choice!"