OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

Post deleted by Atrocities

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding!
 

I don't mean to say that people are stupid, I mean to say that some people are really stupid.

And now for your amusement I submit the following:


I had to tell you that story above so that I could now tell you this story.

About a month back the house and property in front of us was rented out. Two weeks ago I met the new neighbors. *deep breath slow sigh*

To say that theses guys are red necks would be an understatement. These guys are uber red necks. You see, they took these two semi new trucks, one a 2004 Chevy Silverado 1500(?), the other a 2005 Ford F150, bought only a few weeks back with money from an inheritance, and proceed to spend the day, and most of the night, stump jumping them throughout the 40 acres of trees, fields, and wet lands of the property they now rent.

At some point during their hillbilly hoopla fest, they opted to remove the mufflers, via running over [censored], because it made the trucks sound louder, and we all know that the louder the truck, the more powerful it must be. Besides ripping off the fenders, mirrors, and caving in the windshield don't hurt the runnin none.

Well any ways, at around 2 am, quite drunken, armed, and driving their new $30,000 worth of wrecked trucks, these yahoo's decide to go pull up street signs and tear down signal lights. I [censored] you not. At around 2 am in the morning they hall *** down the road, strap on a chain to the bumper of the Ford, because by this time the Chevy is broke down and stuck in a perk hole. They tie the other end of their chain to a stop sign at the end of the private road and with a stomp of the gas, out comes the stop sign. With this success they move further down the road and do it again and again until they come to the ultimate icon of modern day stop signs, the stoplight at the four-way intersection.

But before they wrap the chain around this would be victim of hillbilly stupidity, dump out all of their used beer bottles onto the ground and start shooting them. Oh I am sure one or more bottles meet it doom after being tossed into the air, but who really knows what red neck hill billies do when they shoot glass and aluminum at 2:30 am in the morning.

After about 20 or so minutes of their version of the old west, they go ahead and tie off to the stop signal. They rev the Fords motor several times then lock her into gear and poured on the coals.... kaboom!

Now to be a successful red neck hill billy one must possess a certain degree of inept stupidity for they laughed and giggled and drove off all happy and what not without ever looking back. Had they, they might have noticed something. Oddly as it might seem, if they had stopped to review their actions, they would have discovered that the light post and signal were still standing. And attached to the base of the light post/signal, was their chain. And, has fate would have it, attached to that chain was a bumper. Not any old bumper mind you, but the bumper from a 2005 Ford 150 with, ironically, a license plate baring the very same identification number of the license plate attached to the front bumper of the very same Ford 150 that they were now happily, and quite drunkenly driving off in.

These moron's, and by moron's I mean complete retarded, inbreed, hillbilly, buck tooth, bare foot, dirt floor, long haired, dip ****s rejects from coal country finally tire of the fun and head home. How they make it home is entirely another story, but needless to say they do make it home.

The very next morning I am awoken to the sweet sounds of sirens and police radios. Deadeye, he calls himself this because he shot his left eye out while looking down the barrel of a paint ball gun at the same instant that he pulled the trigger, tells me today that since they can't prove who was driving the truck, they can't charge them with any crime. The trucks owner, his dad, will have to pay for the damages, and wouldn't ya know it, they are very well insured. I mean you would have to be if you treated your vehicles like these morons.

Now old deadeye, (about 18 yrs old) don't remember none of the night, he cain't say what for sure happinned.

Well I can, and despite my blank stupefied stair, have come to realize yet another truth about this wonderful universe that we all live in, that being that God loves stupid people..... He absolutely does.

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding!
 

AT, God did not specifically 'create' stupid people. He did however make the 'Huge Mistake' of giving humankind 'Free Will' one of the numerous side-effects of that decision was/is Stupidity. He did at one point in time try to 'fix' this mistake but when he handed down the 'Commandments' he forgot to remove the 'Free Will' part of the deal. Well, you know what happened, 'Free Will' proved stronger (and stupider) than the word of God.

God had nothing but good intentions, Give humankind 'Free Will' and he thought for sure that we would build a paradise. LoL.. Boy did he ever misjudge how we would use 'Free Will'.

So, what I'm saying is God giving us 'Free Will' is exactly the same as someone giving a redneck a nice new pickup truck. It can be used for so many wonderfull things but there is something deep inside us that compells us to be stupid.

Bottom Line,.. We are ALL rednecks one and all.

Personally, I'd give anything to have God take back 'Free Will' and replace it with 'Common Sense' which is a myth.

LOL, Cheers! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

"Common Sense" is a definite misnomer, since it isn't very common at all!

AT, how come you deleted the first post?? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...s/confused.gif Please don't tell me it offended someone...

You know, with relation to the redneck story, I'm wondering why the drivers of the vehicle couldn't be charged with the destruction of public property. I mean, it's obvious who was driving (hey, maybe it's the hungover guys in the house where the truck is parked!!). Then again, legal systems seem to work more on absolutes than high probabilities.

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

(From Frank Herbert's _God Emperor of Dune_)

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

Free will wasn't a mistake. We live or die by our own choices.

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

If you want some empirical proof that for some folks free will is just a license to thin out and improve the human gene pool, try this site out:

The Darwin Awards

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

Already read most of it. Stupidity isn't heriditary, it's taught.

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

I did not want to offend any one who might take offense to stupid people. Besides, I did not think any one would appreciate the humor. Odd that I deleted the thread, but only the post went away. Very odd.

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

AT, do you think they're likely to do it all again? If so, you should hire a digger somewhen then go out and dig some "truck traps" on their playground, so that next time they go tearing around the countryside they end up nose-down in a massive ditch. =-D

Also, although the police weren't able to prove who was driving, you can be damned sure they KNOW who was driving and will be keeping a close eye on your neighbours from here on in. The next sniff of trouble and they'll know exactly who to go for.

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

No offense taken here, and I'm from a state where redneck idiots abound !!!

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

I did appreciate the humor, and I doubt anyone would take offense. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/cool.gif

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

My new neighbors were out last night playing paint ball; without protective head gear. The flashing lights of the ambulance were like a small fourth of July. Evidently, and this is yet to be officially confirmed, one of them was shot in or near the mouth and knocked out cold. Imagine if you will, a 68 calibar paint ball traveling at around 340 feet per second hitting you in the face at near point blank range. OUCH.

I have Larry the Cable Guy living in front of me. Its a new blue collar episode every day.

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

AT: with all the crazy stuff going on around you all the time, I offer the folowing advice:

1) Take notes.
2) Write a sitcom.
3) Get rich.
4) Retire somewhere with a higher average IQ.

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

Oh, no. Someone already wrote that show.

Ever seen an advertisement for something called 'trailer park boys'?

Imagine the Dukes of Hazzard, only without the morality, the IQ or a clue.

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

I'm an avid, no....make that rabid, fan of paint-ball battles, and having been hit in the face even with FULL protective gear it hurt like a Mother$#@&er.

Once, a few friends and I got soooooo drunk we decided to have a "Quickdraw" gunfight, to settle some braggin' rights !!! Luckily for me the other guy couldn't hit the broad side of a barn if he was on the inside, even sober. He missed, and I nailed him in the right pectoral region. He had a 3" bruise there for weeks.

http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...ies/tongue.gif

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

...Leaving me wondering why I would want to take up paintball...

...Well, aside from the urge to 'harmlessly' shoot things...

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

Paintball is great fun. Done properly (ie protective face goggles, heavy clothes, instant ban for anyone targetting face) the worst you'll get is a set of squash-ball sized bruises all over your body, which are great for showing off and scoring sympathy from women=-)

The thing about paintball is, it is a sharp reminder of just how completely and arbitrarily dead you would be if you ever went to war. You're hiding behind a tree near the enemy objective with no-one else in sight, thinking "no-one can see me, I am invincible" and suddenly... SPLATSPLATSPLAT you've got three paint splodges over some of your favourite vital organs. No more lives, no magic medipacks, no poignant message whispered to a comrade in your dying breath... instantly dead, and you never even saw where it came from.

I ain't ever going to war for real unless there's a *really* good reason for it.

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

Let me tell you, as a person who HAS been to war, that's a damn fine example of how it is. There are no real Rambo's, no John Wayne's, just a lot of guys scared ****less and just doing whatever it takes to get through another day

And there are no bullets with your name on them, just a lot of them marked "to whom it may concern". And mines, and IED's, and....


Still, I love the paintball battles we have around here. The biggest thrill is sneaking up on an opposing buddy who's just absolutely sure he's invisible, and poppin' him just as he's about to pop someone else. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/wink.gif

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

One of 2 Favorite Paintball stories:
We had this one guy who's grandfather was visiting and convinced him to play. He had fought in WWII (this was many years ago). Even though he was significantly older, he was in amazing physical shape. He had a very unique outlook on life after his experiances in the war.

He saw the paintball as a game and treated it as a game. At one point, he got thirsty so walked away from the battle site to get himself a drink of water. While drinking, someone (still not sure who...) shot him in the butt. His response: "@$#%@, you guys are worse than bloody Germans!"

No offense to any Germans out there. I'm German and don't take any.

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

I cannot believe this... I sware to you these guys are some kind of stupid. Last night they decided to do some shooting. They broke out the guns, and just started shooting... beer in hand, pistol in other, they fired at just about everything. The neighbors all freaked out and called the police. While they were popping off rounds, for hours, I decided to let them know that they were not the only ones in the area with a gun. I loaded up the 40 round mag for the AR-15 and proceeded to eviserate the side of a six foot tall burm, (former back stop for our pistol range). A few minutes later my neighbor to the right fired off a dozen or so rounds, and within minutes so several other neighbors around me.... IT was like everyone at about the same time decided to inform those who needed to be informed, that we are a well armed neighborhood. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/laugh.gif

Today I was talking with one of the neighbors at the mail box and she told me her husband had had enough with the hill folk shooting all afternoon that when he heard me cut loose, he decided to join in. Needless to say, the hill billies stopped shooting after the police finally came at around midnight and told them to stop...

There ought to be a law that makes drinking and shooting or even handling a fire arm while drinking illegal.

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

<font color="gold">Oh DAMN !!!</font>

Gotta tell ya,<font color="red">AT</font>, except for a few inbred hillbillies your neck of the woods sounds like the place to be. Give no $#it, and but don't take any either !!!

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

We have been lucky, been here going on 30 years, (say for my own home ownership that lasted 10) and the growth is just now starting to take effect. Fewer open areas, more house, more traffic, more dopes, yuppies, and ridge runners, but otherwise still a nice place to call home. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/smilies/happy.gif

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

Now, if only there was a way to "discourage" the rednecks....

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

Just a note on the darwin awards:

For those of you who take what they say as gospel, they aare actually natoriously inaccurate and filled with exagerations, there is actually an organization of professors (don't have the link to their newsgroup of hand) who make it a hobby of debunking the Darwin Awards and other such common myths.

And as for paintball:

I freaking hate it. And why? One night while walking to a party just up the road from my apartment, I was shot three times in the back by some punk in a car with a paintball gun. Yah, it stung, but more importantly it freaked the [censored] out of me. Imagine this: A dark night, you are walking along the street, suddenly, *Pop* *pop* *pop*. You back stings, you move your hand around and feel your shirt, it's wet, you pull it to your eyes and in the dim streetlight you are horified to see something red. As the pain subsides and you reach your hand back around to find strange bits of plastic, you realize it was only a paintball gun your worry subsides. And then you realize, you are the only one hit, and your favorite shirt is ruined. Pissed off, and what is worse, it was a busy night so you didn't see who shot you.

Yah, I hate paintball and all the godforsaken [censored] that comes with it.

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

Yee Haw! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...ies/tongue.gif

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

Wow, AT. That sure ain't the Portland I where I went to school. I thought everyone in Portland read books in Powell's and skated on bridges. Though there was some "Maury's Gun Rack" or something pretty close by, and they never fixed the bullet holes in the windows http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...ies/tongue.gif Now my home town in Utah, however: I lived next to a junkyard/forest that must make for some amazing paintball. It's kinda surreal to go strolling around and spotting some dude in full camo skulking around... pop pop pop pop pop in the background...

Re: OT: Yes, They Are Breeding! *DELETED*
 

Damn, Sorry to hear that happened to you.

But honestly, that's more a matter of a bunch of dumbass punks being stupid that any real issue with paintballers. The punks that shot you rate right up there with the redneck idiots in <font color="red">AT</font>'s neck of the woods. About 90% of the people I know into paintballing never fire their guns outside of the playfields. A few like to fire at targets, but none have ever "sniped" anybody.

I'd love to find those punks when I have a few "Chiller Specials" loaded in my paintball gun. That'd straighten them out REAL quick....