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Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
*Dogscoff appears in the grey featureless void between realities. In this neutral place his sanity returns, and as it does so his magical powers dwindle. He must act quickly before he is trapped here without any power at all.
First he uses some of his remaining magic to create physical laws. Unfortunately he is not yet completely sane, and this is reflected in the cartoon laws he implements. His next act is to create space and matter. True to the chaotic origin of his magic, everything is inconstant, jumbled and disordered. Random objects, parts of objects, imagination-made-real and clumps of lifeless matter appear out of nowhere, changing and morphing until their inherent chaos gradually succumbs to the monotonous inevitability of physics. In the midst of this, dogscoff barely has time to organise a little bubble of air to surround and sustain him. Finally, using the very Last of his powers, he creates a portal from this place to the "old world", the universe which holds the ruins of the old Cantina. It is an unstable and very fragile gateway, but hopefully the Cantina's residents will all make it through, where they can use their own skills and resources to create some kind of world from this disorder. Spent and powerless, dogscoff floats in his bubble, watching the primordial events of creation unfold... ======================================= OK people, we've got everything we need to build anything we want. Feel free to drag items through from the "old world" to help set up the new one (a matter gravity sphere would be handy=-), so come on in and let's set things up. Hurry, though, the portal won't Last forever and you don't want to be left out. We can rename the thread later, once we figure out exactly what it is we've created. [ June 24, 2003, 08:30: Message edited by: dogscoff ] |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
A small 12 foot A.C.M.E. moving van pulls up to the new site. I get out of the passenger side of the truck and proceed to scan the joint...
Spotting a long bare back wall near where the kitchen might be installed, I tell the movers to unload my prize.. The sixteen movers carefully carry in a 40 foot long antique Oak Bar. It fits perfectly along the back wall. I hope Taz will like it! I then move to an outer wall and set up a nice cozy table next to a window. I have the movers unload my second prize... They quickly install the fake rain maker outside the window. Aaaah nice, I like the soothing sound of the fake rain. I sit and wait to see who comes in next! Cheers! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif [ April 16, 2003, 16:10: Message edited by: David E. Gervais ] |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
*A familliar figure to the residents of the cantina steps through the unstable portal and quickly heads behind a a few planted trees outside the cantina walls, quickly checking down his pants to make sure that stellar instablity hasn't had any adverse side effects *well, it sounds like a typical dogscoff moment* Feeling rather secure knowing his wedding tackle is appropiate order (unlike the time I tried to pass through that unstable wormwhole, you have no idea what the gravity from a black hole can do to you! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/shock.gif )Raging Deadstar sends a message through the unstable portal through to "the other side" and quickly checks to see what the laws of physics are in this realm. He rummages around in his pockets and pulls out a large black hole, ok so that works, throws it underneath a rock and watches as it falls through. RD then quickly dodges out the way as a 1 tonne anvil crashes down beside him. Yes, the carton laws are very much in work here! Seeing this he begins to pull at the unstable portal and manages to pull the medium sized Deadstar Continuum transporter through. Inside this Transport is the remaining stock from the old cantina (The regulars will have to come now i stole all the drink http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif Also inside this are a bunch of new bar staff all eager to start work at this new hedonistic home away from home..*
*RD then walks over to the architectural plans for the site, the outer walls have been made and he starts discussing with dogscoff what stuff is for* So thats the wine and beer store? Too small! *Furious scribbling and adjustments are made* We need a Medieval Dungeon! *yet more furious scribbling* Whats that large room 0n the second floor? *Dogscoff explains that that is the king size "executive memebers only" hard-playroom* I see! *arches eyebrow* Hmm i see the FBW's have demanded a bigger dressing room! *Dogscoff yet again explains this was organised by Growltigger, who obviously gave into strenious "Demands" off the FBW's* *Raging Deadstar then pulls out some large paintings and hangs them on the wall. The Destruction of the first cantina, Artists impresiions of the time Growltiggers testicles expanded to the size of weather ballons (complete with bulging eyes) and the time Geoschmo was attacked by the lucy lui ninja. All classic moments from the past... RD smiles at the happiness (and bruises) this place has given him and proceeds to place some of the old items from the cantina around the new place to sparkle it up. Many hours later he hangs the phongs head that announces the "Door is ajar" every 5 minutes is placed on it's hook and the new Tachyon Projection cannon and Quantum torpedoes are installed at the door.* *Raging Deadstar smiles evily as nowe, true to character he slynks off towards david Gervais who is creating some graphics like the true artist he is and doesn't notice the brooding Deadstar. One swing of an oversized iron wok later and he is sprawled out unconcious on the cantina floor, with drool hanging out his mouth and a glazed look in his eyes. Raging Deadstar smiles to himself at his victory.* FIRST BLOOD!!!!!! *Raging Deadstar happily orders an apple juice and sits down in the darkest corner that is now his sanctuary, happy to know he was the first to commit cartoon violence in the 3rd cantina!* |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
A torrential flow of vomit rushes through the open portal, and knocks RD out of his chair - spilling his apple juice. With the laws of gravity not yet entirely intact, the large glob of vomit becomes selfcohesive and congeals into a single mass, once the flow finally dribbles to a halt.
a mass rotates on the surface, blinking open to reveal a massive eye that takes in the scene, paying careful scrutiny to Scoff, DG, and RD. The mass of vomit spontaniously attains sentience, and becomes self aware. Puke is here. Indescribeable imaginings transpire withing the primordial brain of Puke. A large dome of crystal or glass, which is feared not by Doc Shane (nor by Giordano Bruno), materializes out of the semi-somethingness of this reality, and encloses the cantina and the surrounding grounds. A tarmac appears outside, on which sits a very large egg. Engines grow on the rear of the structure, so that the Cantina might go wherest it wilt. |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
...I don't know how long I have been lying on the floor drooling, but don't care at the moment. I'm too busy trying to control the waves of pain coursing through my body. The source of the pain is one big mother of a goose-egg bump on my cranium. As my eyes slowly come into focus, I notice all seems quiet in the new cantina. I sit back in my chair by the window with the fake rain and the soothong sound of the running water helps to alieviate the pain a little.
I scan the cantina and notice RD in a dark corner,.. Hey RD, have you been here long? Did you see who it was that wasted a perfectly good cast iron pan on my cranium? RD said something while pointing to the door, The ringing in my ears prevented me from catching what he said. From his gesture I assumed that the culpret had left. I offer RD a drink on my tab and ask if he would be so kind as to point out the culprit the next time he sees him. I order myself a drink and decide to take a bit of a rest before getting back to my pixels! ... |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
*Raging Deadstar was busy plotting revnge when he notcies David Gervais regain consciencenous. He finishes putting the polished mahogany table in his corner and has placed a large purple and black leather couch in it. He has also removed most lights in the vicinity of this cornor and has installed a couple of UV lights, just to make himself feel at home.*
Sorry David, never saw that culprit http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif but i have a nasty feeling it was ragnarok, i think he ran back through the portal though! *shakes head* Some people! thanks for the drink! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif *RD sits back on the couch and scoops up the now floating apple juice, realising that he is now floating in mid air!* Someone better bring some anti gravity technology with them, i can't relax on my sofa!! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon9.gif |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
A hulking barbarian enters through the portal, carrying a runecovered rusty (yet pointy) spear in one hand. Following him are two oversized Kylie clones, complete with undersized golden hotpants, carrying flagons containig an assortement of minor toxins, hallucinogenic and aphrodisiacs. The flagons are left at the bar, with instructions to Taz to mix them in the drinks at his own discretion.
He then proceed to a silent corner, where he builds a large fireplace and sets up a large rougly hewn table and a few chairs. Using the rune magic of his rusty (yet pointy) spear, he sets up a magic barrier, securing his little corner from the evils of country music. Yup, this looks like home. |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
40 feet above the roof of the cantina, reality is stretching and...something else few speices even have a name for. something is forming...it looks bright blue...like a small supernove. except, this 'supernova' opens up...revealing a tunnel-like structure stretching away, in a direction that normal physics can't define. and something falls out...sideways. humanoid, in power armor. the figure quikly adjusts it's position to brace for a landing, then begins to slow down. by the time the figure gets to the ground, it is traveling slow enough to make a gentle landing. looking around, the figure takes it's first unhuried survey of the area where it now is. and speaks. "A CHAOTIC, UNFORMED REGION! NOT AGIAN!"
narf heads toward the bar, hoping that someone might be able to tell him something about this newly formed pocket of space. inside, he notices a barbarian and freinds, a newly sentient organic compilation lifeform, an artist who looks like he got hit with something and a sneaky-looking bartender. sitting on a stool, he says "bartender, one part hydrocloric acid, one part suger, one part root beer flavoring. where am i and how did this get here? what's the currency?" [ooc: i was falling sideways, not positioned sideways. hi. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif forgot a few of the practicalities. also, my armor is light gray/light blue.] [ April 16, 2003, 23:07: Message edited by: narf poit chez BOOM ] |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
*Raging Deadstar smiles, unless he is the crafty looking bartender said Raging Deadstar has been practically un-noticed. The corner of the room he resides in his now more homely. Hidden off behind dark purple velvet curtains and a large fire now blazes in the enclosed room. A uv light shines from above and he relaxes on his sofa. Feeling the urge to do evil Raging Deadstar walks over to narf and points out that all drinks must be paid fully in ethiopian currency. He smiles to himself nastily as he watches Narf go and invest his minerals into the now waiting currency conVersion machine, which is totally non refundable! He smiles to himself and polishes the null space projector, sips his apple juice and waits for his nemesis, the one they call Ragnarok!*
[ April 17, 2003, 00:21: Message edited by: Raging Deadstar ] |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
[ooc:so your not the bartender, you just stole the booze?]
realizing that he's been tricked, narf hacks the currency machine with nanotech and drains RD's accounts into his own. then he hacks into the transport bureau and labels rd's transport a derelict and sends some memo's off to some salvage companies, sits back and take's a big swallow. [ooc: so we now have a bartender who's definitly up to something, and who is not rd.] his nanobots nuetralize some unkown chemicals in the drink. since there is nothing apparently sinister about them, the suits central computer simply logs them as 'incidentals' and does not notify narf. |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
His journey from Walla Walla to Flim Flam half done, Katchoo adjusts the air speed and axial rotation of the propeller on his beany hat and floats into the bar.
*putt*putt*putt* Katchoo realizes the lack of gravity here makes his ride more smoothly. He pulls a black 1 x 1 foot tape recorder from 1983 out of his back pocket and hits the record button: "Note to future self, ignore laws of gravity." *click*whirrrrr*rewind*rewind*rewind*click* Having never been here before, Katchoo overlooks the bar and decides to blend in. Rotating 180 degrees in the air so that the crumbs won't fall in his shoes (he already has a lovely collection of rocks and sand in there), Katchoo begins to chew on the Oak Bar. *rarrrrarraaa*crunch*crunch*aaaaarrararrrrr* |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
A big, shiny green bug enters the Nameless Cantina.
"Hey you creatures i see you need a name, how about Rotting Banana?" |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
Hello! This new Cantina is a really nice place! Everything is so brand new and clean... just look at the shine on the floor! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif
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Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
Mac walks into this new place looks around, he appears most disheveld, worn out, his clothes are wet, damp and dirty, BUT, he has a brewski in his hand, The group ask what happened, Mac just looks at them... then slowly tells them, its Gone, its gone again..... he looks around for a cornor table, orders his usual scrambled eggs, toast, hash browns, bacon and a brewski, walks over and sits down, claiming the table, ahhh, feels good to be home again....
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Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
...Exiting the glowing portal, Taz advises everyone NOT to go back through the portal.
'That old cantina is now closed.' Taz then goes to the bar and begins to write-up an expense report. One ACME cruiser with the following components: 1 Master Computer III 1 Quantum Reactor 6 Quantum Engines III 1 Inverted Quantum Beam Total Cost - 108,260 Minerals 21,000 Organics 101,460 radioactives Having done the paperwork, Taz takes his usual position behind the bar and begins to polish the fine oak surface. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
What is THIS? SOMEBODY IS CHEWING ON THE BAR?!!! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/shock.gif http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon8.gif
Taz zips over to Katchoo and quickly winds-up his beanie extra tight. With a sound like an out of control buzzsaw, Katchoo is sent into the rafters with such force that only the top of his beanie can be seen inbedded therein. Satisfied that the problem has been handled, Taz again resumes polishing the bar. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
A new one? What happened to the old one?
*ZA starts a fire* Goodbye.... |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
roughly translated from computer into english:
'potiential dangerous chemical reaction. self-spreading. danger to wearer: none. suit systems 95% functional. suit armor 83% functional. danger to wearer's food: 5 minuts, 19 seconds, estimated. precision not needed. danger to others: unkown. danger or potential help from others: uncertain. owner disaproves of out of control 'fire'.' pshhhhhhh. ''fire' neutralized. biological tagged as poteintaily dangerous. prepare combat systems at next emergence. no engeagement without engagement. current environment suitable for wearer.' |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
::: Steps through the portal, Powers up the local xystems, Verifys the Tabs arrived as expected, Goes to the executive suites to discuss biz with the Cat ::
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Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
*munch*munch*munch*
"Hmmm..." Katchoo notices a different taste to the bar. Maybe that brief spot of vertigo has altered his tastebuds? Possibly... Katchoo sneezes, dislodging himself from the ceiling and floats to the floor. "My, it's getting crowded in here" observers Katchoo. "Well, back to blending in." Katchoo takes off his beany propellor hat to reveal a head full of steaming spaghetti! Reaching into his back pocket Katchoo then pulls out a hot bottle of Head & Shoulders Meat Sauce and pours it generously over his head. "Dig in everyone!" shouts Katchoo, and begins to eat the spaghetti. *munch*munch*munch* |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
Power Man steps through the portal.
As he looks around he see some old and as well as some new folks. He walks over to dogscoff and sees the plans for the new cantina. "If I may, I would like to make an addition to the place." Power man takes out a deck of playing cards and proceeds to build a small house of cards just to one end of the plans. There is a puff of smoke and the small house of cards disappears from the table. With a bigger PUFF of smoke a shinny dark wood door appears in the far side of the cantina. On the door is a brass sign that reads "CARD ROOM No Food Allowed " It appears that along with the poor gravity and the laws of "toon", it looks like there may be some "Pun Power" in this new universe. Power Man opens the door and inside we see that a new addition has been made to the cantina. Inside the card room we can see some gaming tables with fine green coverings. A deep red carpet is on the floor. There is a table for Poker, one for Black Jack (or Baccarat for you Continental folks ) and one just for fun. Each table comes with a Fuzzy Bunny Dealer (FBD) dressed in outfits that make it hard to keep one's eyes on their cards. The room features different sets of lights (even UV) that can be adjusted for just the right amount of light. Power Man says, "I came looking for a place to hold a good card game. Now maybe I can finally get one." "Dogscoff, we can discuss what the "house cut" will be later." Power Man heads to the bar. "Thanks for the offer Katchoo, but I don't feel like having any spaghetti right now. I guess you must also use "head cheese" in your recipe? " "Hay Taz, were are the tribble wings??" |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
Quote:
Want to hear something funny? Narf was trying to fit a square peg in a round hole. I don't know if he was having fun, but he sure sounded genuinely perplexed about it not fitting! I tried to help him but he was much too distracted to hear me! Ah well, next he'll be playing with marbles! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif Cheers! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
*dogscoff looks about at the work done so far, and is pleased. It looks a bit like the Last Cantina, but otherwise is coming along nicely. It's pretty cool to have a mobile establishment too, although so far in this universe there's nothing to go and visit, just a random collection of matter and objects floating around and bumping into one another.
Hmmm... *dogscoff writes something on a beermat, signs it and throws it back through the portal. The note authorised his agents in the old world to make a little purchase using dogscoff's remaining funds. After a while his purchase squeezes through the portal into the new universe. It's a dreadnought, equipped with a master computer (named Hodmimir), some stellar manipulation components, a quantum reactor and a repair bay. Dogscoff gives the ship orders to "go forth and make us some interesting stars and planets and things to visit." Unfortunately, dogscoff didn't have enough money for a brand new master computer, and the one he has bought is... shall we say... part-worn. You know what these cheap AIs can be like after a little use, they can get a little... quirky. "You want 'interesting', do you?" says Hodmimir, before giggling maniacally and zooming off into the nothingness to fulfil its task. Who knows what it will create... |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
[ooc: can i help it if the suits overprotective? don't worry, i'll come up with funny. at the very least, the burgening fued between me and deadstar should provide some:).]
loud clunking noises are heard coming from outside. it sounds like a salvage ship latching on to something. [to bad he got his stuff of first. oh well.] narf chuckles. then he points his finger at a darkened, unnoticed corner, and says "nano: kareoke machine". a stream of nanobots quickly builds a kareoke machine, then returns to his body. narf grins quietly to himself [my character specialises in quiet mischief...so no one knows who did it:) square peg in round hole? perhaps. how do you feel about pranks? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif ] [ April 18, 2003, 03:38: Message edited by: narf poit chez BOOM ] |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
[ooc:what, katchoo got your tongues?
uh... *whacks himself with T5xE3PDH*] [ April 18, 2003, 08:11: Message edited by: narf poit chez BOOM ] |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
Quote:
"Hmmm...? Oh, no...no cheese...i'm lactose ignorant..." Katchoo turns to look around the bar and sees everyone staring at him. Or ignoring him. He can't really tell since he has meatsauce in his eyes. "C'mon everyone, eat up!" Spaghetti sauce spits out as Katchoo speaks, spraying most of the bar with red sauce. *slurrrrrrrp*munch*munch*munch* |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
...Taz serves Powerman his tribble wings and returns to the bar just in time to see Katchoo spraying sauce on the bar. Taz does a double take as he notes Katchoo is eating what seems to be spaghetti out of his head. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/shock.gif
He wants to be angry at Katchoo for the mess but how can he blame a critter that has such a handicap? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon9.gif Taz decides that he will experiment and see if he can determine if Katchoo is an intelligent customer or some out-of-control pet. Taz carefully opens some very hot pepper (the kind that comes in sealed lead containers with flashing warning labels) and sprinkles the pepper thickly over the spaghetti. He figures that an intelligent critter should be able to learn NOT to eat his own brain. (even if it is spaghetti) Taz then stands back to see the results of his first test. |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
*munch*munch*lipsmack*lipsmack*
...? Katchoo starts to feel a tingling sensation on his head. Pulling out his bottle of Head & Shoulders Meat Sauce, he smiles. "Wow, it tingles, so it must be working!" Tears stream down Katchoo's face as he contiues eating the spaghetti that grows in place of hair. *munch*munch*slurrrrrrrrp*munch* Off in the corner, the barbarian eyes Katchoo. Could the barbarian possibly mistake Katchoo for the mythological figure known as Medusa? Could he...? |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
'biological upgraded to strange catagory 4, yuck catagory 2. note for base: group 12-14 year-old programmers idea 3.7 point effiency upgrade, o.r.c. scale. catagory naming -0.5. difficulties in data exchange with sentients (that means people). note preceeding programmed interjection (snob). 0.25 resources diverted for non-esientials.'
[ooc: the o.r.c. scale is out of 10.] narf takes another look at katchoo. 'yuck' he thinks. then he decides to keep an eye on taz. he might not approve of the goop slowly starting to peel off the ceiling. or, he might approve. or, spoil it for fun. 2/3. narf puts some bait (salted nuts) down on the table below while taz is ocupied. he considers some string in katchoo's spagetti...but he's too likely to get caught. besides, 2 pranks on something is overdoing it. [ April 19, 2003, 09:27: Message edited by: narf poit chez BOOM ] |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
*Raging Deadstar emerges from his corner and orders yet another apple juice and then returns to his sanctuary. The entrance is now complete with a specially added enema firing cannon to keep away any mischeivious little "oiks". He smiles to himself as he notices his medium transport being towed away and quickly opens up his laptop and sends a message to the ship, smiling as the self destruct device explodes taking the bloody thieves with it!*
Right.... Now Narf! I'd love to have a feud with you, but i am currently waiting for Ragnarok, if you've read the Last few pages of the old cantina you will notice i'm currently busy feuding with him, but i'm sure if you insult Powerman he will give you some violence(or whatever you're looking for http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif ) *As Raging Deadstar smiles to himself he throws his voice to where narf is standing. "ONIONS!" Raging Deadstar feels a suitbale measure of revenge has been achieved and watches as the "oik" is buried under a pile of Onions. Then he pulls a black hole out of his pocket and slides it underneath the large pile of veg and watches as it crashes down into the basement with a satisfying crash of pots and pan like noises. He then lies down on his sofa and loads up his napalm spreader, soon Ragnarok will come, and RD will be waiting *brood* *brood** [ April 19, 2003, 11:50: Message edited by: Raging Deadstar ] |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
..I walk into the new antina and move over to my table by the window with the fake rain and order a nice tall galss of Amaretto di Sarono on ice..
I pull out my laptop and thanks to the latest in wireless technology, I hook up to the net and log on to the #se4 chanel at Gamesnet. hmmm, Rollo's in the shower and for the first time I see no sign of Fyron and SJ... I sit patiently and see who else will join the chat.. Cheers! |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
...Hmmm, Katchoo is still eating the spaghetti! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/shock.gif
Perhaps the little critter is just extra hungry - I'll give it something else and see if it eats that. Taz goes to the Kitchen and prepares an order of Tribble wings. He then takes the wings and a tall frosted mug of beer and sets it down beside Katchoo. Glancing around the bar, Taz notices that some shadowy figure in armor is watching him. In almost any other establishment this would be suspicious - but not here. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/tongue.gif Taz also notices some salted nuts and gives those to Katchoo as well. Taz makes a note to himself to watch this narf fellow more closely. Taz goes back to wiping the bar and waits for further developments. [ April 19, 2003, 17:47: Message edited by: Taz-in-Space ] |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
narf suddnely relizes that he needs to replace an obscure but important part of his suit, called an isp. using his nanobots he rots the onions around him. then he hides them in places were it will be hard to find them. narf flies out of the hole and says "sorry, mantenence time, gotta run"
meanwhile, the green goop follows the nuts along the ceiling. [it's basically an advanced Version of silly putty, 5 feet across, nonsentient, dark green, follow's the nuts and each time one is eaten it grows a little less attached to the cieling. when the Last ones eaten, it becomes bright green and falls. i'm assuming the cieling and corners are dark. i'm switching my isp. don't know when i'll be back, but it should be within 5 days. side note: the suits 'personality' is: 3 dashes of anylitical machine, 1 dash of housekeeper, 1 dash of war machine. narf's is kinda into pranks and a little annoyed that he can't get out of the suit. why he always orders something with poison in it.] |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
Power Man looks over and sees that he as been rated THREE STARS !!
“YAY, my Rants have Finally been Rated !!” “Taz, a round of your best three star al for the room. Even the guy under the tanning (UV) lamps. Power Man sees David G. sitting at the window. “Hay David see what I managed to save from the Old Place.” Power Man opens his Carry-All and pulls out the small fountain from the model cantina. It’s a little dented and scratched but it looks like it would still work. Power Man takes it outside and sets it up in front of the New Place. He turns up the water pressure to the fountain. This causes the fountain to expand into a full size fountain, complete with a small pond and some benches. If one looks into the pond one may see some very hard to spot and reclusive “COY Fish”. “I think this place could use some flowers.” Power Man opens his Carry-All and pulls out some planters and puts them around the benches. In the theme of a major holiday on my home world I am going to plant some Lilies. As soon as the lilies are planted they begin to change. Their flowers get kind of orange stripes and the edges get what look like sharp little points (almost like teeth!). The stems get a coating of orangish fuzz. And the leaves get a set of (claw like ) stickers. If one listens one might hear what sounds like a “Meow-- FITZ…FITZ ”!!! But don’t get too close. These are “Limp Lilies” no more. No, get too close and you will get your Nose Nibbled ! They are now Tiger ( or maybe TIGGER) Lilies !! So David, you don’t have to listen to fake rain. You can listen to the splashing fountain. (Just watch out for the Tigger Lilies.) (Oh what PUNishment! ) http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
*Raging Deadstar watches as powerman continues to butcher all things cultural and sane. He Loads up his napalm spreader and unleashes firey hell upon powermna, who tries to avoid the falling flames, looking like a morris dancer whilst doing so! RD then pulls the emergency "Fire Bomb" cord and watches as the weapon fires a giant load of napalm at Powerman. Seeing that Powerman is now extra crispy and blackened he smiles to himself and proceeds to relax!*
Tanning booth?! Do i look like the sort of person who wants a tanning booth! *Shakes his head and fires his portable gravitation hellbore with combined null space abilities. He smiles as Powerman's face becomes twisted with pain and laughs evily, knowing thet powermans bladder is rapidly imploding. Powerman runs to the "Inner Snactum" to relieve himself after one to many drinks. Raging Deadstar smiles and decides he wants to play his next game of seiv in peace and orders his Talena Atfield and Otep Shamaya combat trained body guards to make sure no one disturbs him!* Speaking of not being disturbed! Where is Ragnarok?! it's been 5 days and he hasn't put in an appearance. I'll give him 5 more days and if he doesn't appear i win the war *gets up and does victory dance! Luckily the curtains are closed so no-one sees!* http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/blush.gif Come on rags, i've set the ultimatum! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif [ April 21, 2003, 18:41: Message edited by: Raging Deadstar ] |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
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Of course, now that you installed the fountain, I'll be sure to take advantage of the benches on nice sunny days! Cheers! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
...OK everybody Powerman has bought a round for the house! (Just hope he can still pay after getting napalmed) http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif
And while your getting your drinks, Take a copy of Taz's very first game: 1050951944.zip after downloading it, just unzip to a directory and execute the EXE file. (NO I did NOT mean to kill the file! RUN IT!! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...s/rolleyes.gif ) ESC will exit game F1 will bring up the help file Any insanity derived from game is at own risk and free! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/tongue.gif http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif Comments/complaints here or to fishnetpenna@yahoo.com |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
*Raging Deadstar notices that a large arcade style computer game has been placed in a corner. Raging Deadstar walks over and pays the fee, which he notes is exceptionally high, seeing that taz is the creator it's probably lining growltiggers pockets so he happily continues and watches as hundreds of food shaped objects fly across what only looks like an oak polished bar!*
Nice Taz, is pretty fast though, i probably have burst a blood vessel in my fingers from that! Do you get bonus points for the brewski's? *Sits down and thinks and orders a nice fruit cocktail juice with a lime slice on the top and proceeds to wait for the next unsuspecting customer* [ April 21, 2003, 20:41: Message edited by: Raging Deadstar ] |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
Power Man returns "Relaxed and Refreshed" from the "Inner Sanctum".
What was that famous quote ? "I love the smell of napalm in the morning." Ya RD like your purple curtains, UV lights, and enema firing cannons are "cultural and sane". Maybe I ought to change your lights to be what they call "Black lights", you know the ones that make everything glow. That would give you a "different" color. Power Man steps out of the cantina for a bit. A short time later Taz gives RD a note. RD reads the note. "GO OUTSIDE YOU NEED MORE TRAINING. Signed A Wise Master" Intrigued RD goes outside. He sees that a large Un-Painted fence has been built all around the cantina! There is a small sign sitting on a large can of toon paint the never empties and tiny angry toon brush that is always "Bristled" . It reads "Time for a LESSON." Since RD knows that this is the way to true wisdom he is COMPELLED to take up the tiny brush and he begins to Paint the Fence. He will CONTINUE to paint the fence until the job is done. However the fence is VERY LONG. The brush is VERY TINY. And when (and IF) he ever gets done the toon paint will change color, forcing him to START OVER. One Last item. The fence was made from "Drift" Wood. SO as RD is painting the fence the whole loop and RD lift off the not so solid ground and in the weak gravity they both start Drifting Away!! RD is so ATTRACTED by the unpainted fence that, paint can and brush in hand, he just keeps on painting away. Good By RD. I hope you will Learn something. Ragnarok are you out there? When are you going to show up? RD needs some one else to play with. All I ever wanted is a good card game. |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
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*Raging Deadstar finally wanders back into the cantina having painted the fence, albeit badly and in different sevral colours but still it is pianted. During this time he has learnt many wonderous things and gained supernatural powers. For he is now a wise master himself now! He returns now in traditional black robes with purple insides with a purple belt round his waist! he searches his now vast memory for many different revenges! Fianlly he picks a suitbale measure and He then pulls out his enema shooting device and gives powerman 1 minute to run. Thinking to himself he loads the armour piercing buttplugs and proceeds to go hunting!* In the words of GT HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOOOOOOOOOO!!! |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
Primitive walks up to the new arcade game. With his great leather boot, he gives the maschine a viscious kick. This both starts the game and empties it for the credits from the previous players. He easily finds a good rythm, consentrating on the beer, the pizzas and the red peppers. He scores and scores and scores and...
Hmm, Maybe his kick has broken the game, cause it never stops, and it also seems to get easier after a while when some of the food items run out. Seeing all that beer flying by , Primitive feels the need to relieve himself. He chooses the new fountain by the new (badly painted) fence. At least he doesn't have to use the sissy facilities indoors anymore. LOL Great idea Taz |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
Power Man chooses not to run.
He reaches into his Power Suit and pulls out his Long Thick Pink TOON ERASER (What were you thinking?) With a few swipes RD's enema shooting device disappears from his hand. A few more and RD's Hand Disappears !! A dozen more swipes with the Eraser and Power Man has "Rubbed out" Raging Deadstar !! All that is left is RD's two big blinking toon type eyes. These fall on the bar with a coin like "ping". Taz mistakes the eyes for a tip and grabs them up off the bar and puts them into his "Tip Jar". (you could say that it look like Taz "has your eyes".) Power Man looks out and sees a ship coming through the portal. "OH BOY it is my new PC (Personal Cruiser) I ordered." He leaves the building and goes out to check his new PC. On his way he sees primitive heading toward the fountain with "that look". "Oh Oh this could be interesting." As primitive gets ready to "use the fountain" he hears the rustlings of many leaves. The Tigger lilies do not like the idea of anyone spoiling the waters. They begin to turn their sharp toothed flowers toward primitive. Their sharp stickered leaves snap out after primitive's "best bits". Not only that but those "Coy" fish have turned into "Oriental Fighting" fish and they start leaping up trying to catch any thing "dangling". Yes, unlike the "poor fountain" in the Old cantina that was for ever getting messed up, this time the fountain has defenders !! Primitive, not wanting to get his Pee-Pee Pricked, (sorry folks, I could not resist) quickly leaves the fountain area. Still feeling "un-empted" primitive is happy to spot a "primitive", sweet smelling, "honey bucket" type out house just on the other side of the poorly painted fence. He makes a "Bee" line for the honey bucket and "goes" inside. PHUE the honey bucket is not so "sweet smelling" anymore. |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
*Ragnarok walks into the new Cantina and thinks to himself: "Wow, this place is really nice. I'll just set myself up in a new corner over here. Ahh yes, this should do just nicely."*
*RD is sitting in his booth sipping his orange juice waiting for Ragnarok to continue to battle. Rags walks up to RD and says: "Hey RD, I ran into some people with the Universal News Network (UNN) in the parking lot; they said they've heard alot about you and want to take your picture." RD gets really excited at the news and he goes running out to the parking lot where Rags has hired some people to pose as the UNN folks, they proceed to have RD stand on a X in the middle of the parking lot to "take his picture". RD is smiling gleefully waiting for the camara to snap. There is a bright flash and when RD is able to see again he looks down only to notice that there is a huge hole where the X used to be, of course the laws of cartoon physics kick in and he falls the second he realizes what is going on. It is the bottomless pit in which he will not be able to escape.* Sorry for the delay RD, been a bit hectic, plus haven't had any ideas for taking you out. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif *Ragnarok blows his trumpet and yells, "CHARRRRGE!!" |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
*munch*munch*munch*
*BURRRRRP!* Having finished his meal Katchoo puts his beany propeller hat back on. "Hmmm...no napkins..." Katchoo muses. Katchoo reaches over the bar, grabs Taz's apron, and yanks it off. *Yank!* Katchoo wipes his faces clean and then heads out the door to use the Honey Bucket. Several days later Katchoo finishes his "business" with the bucket and re-enters the bar. Katchoo tosses Taz's apron back to him. "There's no toilet paper out there either" Katchoo remarks to Taz before heading for the new gambling room. Meanwhile the Honey Bucket becomes it's own life form, and as it's first sentient act, commits suicide. A funeral will be held on Friday. |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
...Taz sees the well-used apron on its way and zips over to intercept it with the Toxic-waste Barrel.
With a hiss and a clang, the apron is sealed in the barrel with no time to spare. After feeding Katchoo the Pepper and Tribble wings Taz knows better than try to clean THAT apron again! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif Hmmm, Powerman 'rubbed out' RD? Can't have a good customer default on his TAB that way! http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/tongue.gif Taking an indelable ink pen from his pocket, Taz draws in an outline shaped vaguely like RD and places the eyes about where they should be. Taz then waits for the laws of cartoonland to work their magic... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
"Raging Deadstar looks around, Ragnarok is looking rather guilty and powerman has apparently been rubbed him out! Luckily Raging Deadstar isn't falling forever down a bottomless pit, it turns out that the dust from the eraser blew past Narf and projected raging Deadstars image to ragnarok. So narf is currently falling down a botomless pit, but Raging Deadstar is now a stick man standing in the middle of the cantina (anyone think taz got the idea off the nike advert? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif ) The stick Version of Raging Deadstar picks up the indelable ink pen and draws on a massive quantum torpedo launcher and a remote control. He then wanders over to david gervais, who after many hours repaints Raging Deadstar back to his former 3d glory, complete with said weapons gleaming from Gervais's superior art work*
*Raging Deadstar pushes the remote control and a giant anvil falls and crushes Powerman, then there is a whirring sound as something like a ship falls out the sky. The sqaushed powerman grows teo large cartoon eyes and feet and waddles over to the door only to see his beloved Dread 2 falling from the sky, reeling from a deadly blow from the Anathema class Battleship. The ship then explodes in a giant fireball of splendour. The squashed powerman just looks on in disbelief. Raging Deadstar then turns round and fires all 6 of his quantum torpedoes at ragnaroks corner, virtually vaporising anything in there except the walls. Ragnarok is then placed in the toxic waste barrel and is sealed before being ejected into space!* Right *rubs hands* Taz one apple juice please, i believe my revenge has been swift and...vengeful! |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
rd is yelling "i got you all" in the middle of the cantina. he seems to have been driven into delusion. after all, the Last time anyone saw narf, he left. and he's still gone till i switch my isp, for the sake of continuity. and to make sure nothing happens to him while i'm gone. so rd's having delusions. he also ate a nut. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif
[OT] come on, people, don't you want to see the Last person to eat one of the nuts covered in green goop? http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
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*RD wonders to himself who was falling down that bottomless pit then, as it wasn't him, or narf! But it doesn't pray on his conscience long as he returns to his corner and relaxes* |
Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
i ziped out when i thought my isp was going to turn me off. since i don't know when there going to turn if off, i've left myself out. and your still nuts. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif
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Re: Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave
Did someone mention nuts covered in green goop? Where? I'm hungry... food.... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif
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