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-   -   OT - Tigg-scoff birthday party (http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/showthread.php?t=7387)

dogscoff September 17th, 2002 10:42 AM

OT - Tigg-scoff birthday party
 
After a week of frantic preparation, the Tigg-scoff bithday party is ready to begin. The gates to the Party palace are thrown open and the jostling masses outside are admitted. Creatures of all species and persuasions from across the galaxy file in and seat themselves at the plush tables, admiring he opulent decorations and attractions around them.

The giant rotating Kylie statue is the centrepiece, squirting out champagne as planned. Teams of cheerleaders can be seen on the sidelines, practising their moves for later when they will support the FBW tag wrestling tournament.

Screams, followed by the gurglings of auto-cloners can be faintly heard as competitors in the Bill Gatres clone creative pain threshold competition practise for the big event.

Hundreds of "Tiggettes" - sexy women in little more than Tiger ears and tails - are performing amazing feats of trapezery above the tables.

Everyone is just starting to get into the swing of things when the music stops and a drum roll commences. It breaks into funky music and the dimmed lights give way to lasers and spotlights which pick out the first guest of honour. It's Dogscoff. He makes his way through the crowd, shaking hands and receiving thanks for the party along the way. Doris (his Valkyrie personal wellfare enforcement officer) follows, wearing slinky black number which not only shows off her impressive curves but her terrifying array of concealed weapons. Dogscoff eventually arrives at the central table, which overlooks the honey-filled wrestling pit and has still an empty seat reserved for Growltigga. The party can't start until he's here. I'm sure he'll make a good entrance...

Growltigga September 17th, 2002 11:01 AM

Re: OT - Tigg-scoff birthday party
 
Like the first ripples upon the waters of the ocean which lead to mightiest tsunamis, a wave of silence echoes out across the party palace, gathering strength as it grows. All fall quiet, the cheerleaders stop cheerleading, the Bill Gates-clone abUsers stop abusing, the FBW wrestlers stop rubbing in the baby oil... all is quiet.

All heads look upwards, shifting shafts of shimmering fire are weaving across the heavens, sparking in the night in glittering bursts of actinic fire. The crowds tremble for verily, they are aware that they are now in the presence of majesty, glory and power in all its incarnations. The chiaroscuro of lights coalesces and focuses on one glittering point, a ball of fire gathers there and the crowds can feel that something great and wonderful is beginning to form there.

The silence is shattered by the most god-almightly loudest guitar powerchord in the history of mankind, a guitar shaped starship erupts from the glowing ball of fire and on the flat top deck, a tuxedo-clad Growltigga can be seen standing, with Sophie Marceau, Ines Sastre, Claudia Schiffer, Heidi Klum and Cindy Crawford arrayed artfully at his feet. Around him, the reformed members of Queen launch into "We will rock you" and the crowd go wild.

The spaceship settles by the VIP suite and Growltigga, looking more debonaire than Piers Brosnan and more sexy than Brad Pitt, walks over to his seat. He nods to Dogscoff and raises his arms, all goes quiet again as the mighty kat turns to faces the adoring crowds...

"Courtesy of Tigg-Scoff plc, let the party begin, the bar is free all night"

Hundreds are trampled in the ensuing stampede

dogscoff September 17th, 2002 11:41 AM

Re: OT - Tigg-scoff birthday party
 
Quote:

the reformed members of Queen launch into "We will rock you"
<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Umm... some of the members of queen will require more reforming than others, if you know what I mean. Maybe you got hold of some authentic genetic material for the auto-cloner...

With a fanfare, the preliminary bouts of the FBW tag-wrestling begin. Four fully oiled FBWs begin writhing around at the bottom of the honey-pit, with one of the delightful Cue Cappan girls from Madame Ooloo's acting as referee. The crowd goes silent at the spectacle, and Dogscoff has to physically restrain Tigga, who is ready to use the diving board straight away. "Save it for later, mate. Trust me, it will be worth it..."

Growltigga September 17th, 2002 12:24 PM

Re: OT - Tigg-scoff birthday party
 
BOINNGG BOINNNG BOINGG BOINNGG

wibble wibble wibble frisnet

GRRRRRRRR!!!!!

Gryphin September 17th, 2002 02:09 PM

Re: OT - Tigg-scoff birthday party
 
Warnning, Warning, Warning
The Galactic Wide Famous Gryphin Positon will be demonstrated here befor your very eyes, (or what ever sensory organs you have). We would like to emphasize this is not for the weak of heart, (or what ever organ pumps your what ever it pumps). As such the live demo will be held in the newly built Gryphin Growltigga Stadium. :: points over there ::
Attend at your own risk. Mangment denys respociblity for your health.
(GT you might want to insert some leaglese here)

Growltigga September 17th, 2002 04:07 PM

Re: OT - Tigg-scoff birthday party
 
I cant insert any legalese, I am too busy dancing

mac5732 September 17th, 2002 06:05 PM

Re: OT - Tigg-scoff birthday party
 
(8) 100 bottles of beer on the wall
100 bottles of beer
if one of them should happen to fall
99 bottles of beer on the wall (hic)

jusstt lovve biiirrrthhddayyy parties...

haaaappppy Birrtthhhhdaayyyy,

pass the brewskis....

celebrating mac

sachmo September 17th, 2002 06:14 PM

Re: OT - Tigg-scoff birthday party
 
Quote:

Originally posted by dogscoff:

The giant rotating Kylie statue is the centrepiece, squirting out champagne as planned.

<font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">From EXACTLY where is the champagne squirting? That bit of knowledge will play a major part in what is in my glass during the Tigg-Scoff birthday toast...

Growltigga September 17th, 2002 06:30 PM

Re: OT - Tigg-scoff birthday party
 
Sachmo, the champagne is coming out of her perfectly formed and pert breasts....

Mac, there is free brewskis all night so you dont need to fill up your colostomy bag for later... you can have fresh booze until midnight tomorrow..

Growltigga sidles off onto the dancefloor wondering where Claudia Schiffer got to

mac5732 September 17th, 2002 07:13 PM

Re: OT - Tigg-scoff birthday party
 
GT, my profuse salutations to you and dogscoff on you Day of Days, also my profound tks for the free brewskis.... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon7.gif I shall try and endeavor to indulge a weeeee litttllle bittt before the Taz shows up http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon12.gif also don't want to be to incapacitated during the upcoming wrestling matches and demonstrations..... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif but afterwards the contents of the brewskis shall be running most swiftly throughout the party room enhancing those within to partake and enjoy themselves to the next level of fullfillment...

partying Mac


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