[Krsqk]

Thought I'd share this. It doesn't reflect anyone's point of view (at least that I know of), but might be good for a chuckle or two. Or maybe just for getting everyone united to come lynch me.

Good evening. My name is Hans Blix. This evening, at the request of Iraqi President Saddam Hussein, we are beginning a series of debates between Mr. Hussein and U.S. President George W. Bush.
I will serve as moderator. Let me begin by thanking the nonpartisan League of Women Voters for sponsoring tonight's event.
Mr. Hussein won an earlier coin flip and will go first.
(Applause and cheering)
Blix: I must ask the French delegation to refrain from further outbursts.
Saddam: We have been accused of hiding weapons of mass destruction. This is a lie. In fact, we have just recovered this document that proves we are telling the truth. (Saddam holds the paper up to the camera.)
"Anthrax -- all gone!
"VX nerve gas -- all gone!
"Fissionable material -- all gone!"
Voice from audience: Good enough for me!
Blix: Please, Mr. Chirac.
Bush: Nobody believes the dictator of Iraq. He is in noncompliance and you know it, Hans.
Blix: It depends on what the definition of compliance is. Iraq has been more compliant in matters of noncompliance, particularly as pertains to a commitment to either comply or not comply.
Bush: What?
Blix: When this inspection gig is over, I want to be chairman of the Fed.
Bush: We don't talk like that in Texas. In Texas, we say, "Bombs away!" That's the only strategery for dealing with thugs.
Saddam: Great Satan!
Bush: Evildoer!
Saddam: Crusader Conqueror!
Bush: Terrorist!
Blix: Please, please, gentlemen.
(Saddam's cell phone rings)
Saddam: I am happy to say our diligent search crews have found two more 155 R-400 bombs filled with mystery fluid in the home of an Iraqi scientist. What more compliance do you want?
From audience: Good enough for me!
Bush: Can we talk to this Iraqi scientist?
Saddam: Too late. Already dead.
Bush: The Evildoer kills and tortures his own people.
Saddam: Baby Bush!
Bush: Butcher of Baghdad!
Blix: Please, gentlemen!
Bush: This dictator is in cahoots with al-Qaeda. If you look closely at these satellite images, you see Saddam Hussein with that tall fella whom we know to be Osama bin Laden.
Shout from the audience: "Way to go, mate!
Blix: Mr. Blair!
Saddam: American lies! That's Dan Rather. He's interviewing one of my body doubles.
Bush: Enough stalling. Surrender your weapons of mass destruction.
Saddam: OK, OK. You win. I brought our Last one with me this evening. This is all we have left, and I am turning it over to U.N. inspectors.
(He produces small vial.)
From audience: Good enough for me!
Blix: What is it?
Saddam: Smallpox. Oops!
(Drops vial and it shatters on ground. Panic ensues in auditorium as people stampede to exits. Bush and Saddam don't move.)
Bush: Got my shot Last month.
Saddam: Me too.
Bush: Axis of Evil!
Saddam: Anglo imperialist!

*ducks for cover*