[Thermodyne]

Found these over at Seti's forum:

Fun With The French

Donald Rumsfeld: "Going to war without the French is like going
deer hunting without your accordion."

David Letterman: "France wants more evidence [of Iraqi violations].
The Last time France wanted more evidence, it rolled right through
France with a German flag."

Dennis Miller: "The only way the French are going in is if we tell
them we found truffles in Iraq."

Jay Leno: "I don't know why people are surprised that France won't
help us get Saddam out of Iraq. After all, France wouldn't help us
get the Germans out of France!"

Rep. Roy Blunt, R-Mo.: "Do you know how many Frenchmen it takes to
defend Paris? It's not known, it's never been tried."

Blunt again: "Somebody was telling me about the French Army rifle
that was being advertised on eBay the other day -- the description
was:
'Never shot. Dropped once.'"

French President Jacques Chirac: "As far as I'm concerned, war
always means failure."

John Xereas: "Do you know it only took Germany three days to
conquer France in World War II? And that's because it was raining,"

French Foreign Minister Dominique de Villepin was applauded at the
Security Council after he spoke out against U.S. war plans Friday.
They've taken their own precautions against al-Qa'ida. To prepare for
terrorist attack, each Frenchman is urged to keep duct tape, a white
flag, and a three-day supply of mistresses around the house.

House Speaker Dennis Hastert is so angry at France for opposing White
House policy on Iraq that he's proposed requiring orange warning
labels on every bottle of imported French wine. Let's guess. The
warning label will read, Just Two Glasses Could Make Dictators with
Mustaches Appear Less Threatening Than They Really Are. ---Argus
Hamilton

Dennis Miller: What do you expect from a culture and a nation that
exerted more of its national will fighting against Disney World
and Big Mac's than the Nazis?

An old saying:
Raise your right hand if you like the French....
Raise both hands if you are French.

Q: Why are there so many tree-lined boulevards in France?
A: Germans like to march in the shade.

John McCain, U.S. Senator from Arizona: "You know, the French remind
me a little bit of an aging actress of the 1940s who was still
trying to dine out on her looks but doesn't have the face for it."

Conan O'Brien: "You know why the French don't want to bomb Saddam
Hussein? Because he hates America, he loves mistresses and wears a
beret. He is French, people."

Jay Leno: "Some members of Congress are so upset with this thing
with France that they want to impose trade sanctions against French
products. They want to ban French products like Evian. And you
thought Hollywood celebrities were against the war before....!"

Q: What did the mayor of Paris say to the German Army as they
entered the city in WWII?
A: "Table for 100,000 m'sieur?"

Jay Leno: "France and Germany still say they are still our allies.
You know, the same way Bill and Hillary are husband and wife."