[Cipher7071]

As far as emotion is concerned, only you know the feelings you want to pass along. The trick is to get it on the page so that the reader perceives it as you intend. This is not always easy. For the most part, to my ear this reads as a history, but I see that you are beginning to dabble in the personal with your author character, and the unidentified female character in the paragraph after.

[ March 02, 2004, 13:29: Message edited by: Cipher7071 ]