[Xavier]

To answer your question but not the poll:

Set independant strength to 6 (or more), magicsites to 50, score graphs disabled. Expand as fast as possible, and as soon as you encounter the enemy attack them, because you have to assume they would attack you first anyway. Ignore the AI's Messages where they declare war - assume you're always at war with everyone.

At least, that's how all my smaller MP games seem to go. I'm not experienced with the larger ones, but in the one I have ongoing (we're currently on turn 10) I'm going with the tactic "avoid war on all fronts" so that I don't get ganked by 4 nations at once. My neighbours seem more than happy to sign cease-fire agreements. Unfortunately, you can't simulate this with the AI.