[Zapmeister]

(apologies to those that may have read this on DomX)

"What's up, Fatso?"

Snoutlofty, King of Lizards for All Time or Until We Recruit Another One, strode into the Inner Sanctum of the High Temple of C'tis to stand before the subject of his religion, where he proceeded to study the claws on his right maw with indifference.

"That's Wondrous Fatso, Mother of EveryBody Especially You, to you! Show some respect for your God, Reptile! What news of the other nations of our land?", replied the Imposing Presence before him.

"Well, we know that Marignon is out there, and so is Ermor. There's rumours of Pangaea, Atlantis and Arcoscephale as well. We don't know much about them, except that they all have better troops than us."

"Better troops? Nonsense! Call out the Emerald Guard!", bellowed the would-be god. Snoutlofty raised his eyes to the ceiling and sighed.

"Your Obesity, this is C'tis. No decent heavy infantry, no decent archers, no morale and no clue" (much like their god, he muttered inaudibly). "If you're serious about this ascension thing, you would have been better off with anyone else. Except Mictlan, of course. Now, will there be anything else? Just a moment - you're pregnant! Have you been dallying with the Lord of Fertility again? How are you going to go trampling with a bun in the oven, you dumb god?".

The Mother of Everybody turned a puce shade of crimson and dismissed her prophet. Maybe C'tis was a bad choice. Still, anyone that can recruit those super multi-headed hydra things can't be ALL bad. Fatso smiled smugly.