that is only because the ai can't cope with ermor .
since 2.12 ermor may not use the vq anymore so it has lost even more of its danger .
in a 8-10 player mp game ermor is nasty but it will normally be far behind in research or only small .
his freespawns can get killed quite quick even with banishment .
have you ever seen wither bones , dust to dust , holy pyre and the other undead killer spells in action in battle ?
he will attack with a legion of e.g. 1000 freespawns your 50-100 troops but when you can cast one of the above mentioned spells + have some priests your odds to win the battle are good .
if you are not his direct neighbor at start ermor is normally not the biggest problem .
ermor is still a good nation , perhaps even top 5 but not too strong .
you will soon notice this yourself too
have you scoregraphs on ?
leading in troop sizes for ae ermor is normal but normally he should be behind in research and only about nb 3 in gem income but normally not number 1 .
in your game your friend was just lucky because the ai can't cope with ermor .
i think though that perhaps your friend has summoned lots of priests for more reanimations and is far behind in research and not top in gem income .
ermor is nasty but has its issues . research and almost limited to death are the 2 biggest .