[PashaDawg]

DECLARATION OF DISGUST
with Imposition of Sanctions

We, the undersigned Noble Lords of the Empire of Ulm, being duly authorized by divine fiat issued by His Most Holy PASHA, the Black Iron Lord of Ulm, do hereby find the base villain, THE PANTHER, pretender and scourge of the universe, to be guilty of scores of heinous acts such as:

He hath polluted the environment with thaumaturgic garbage and refused to clean up after himself. He hath betrayed the natural liberty inherent to the ontological essence of his meek winged folk and hath enslaved them and made them do his evil deeds while he worked through them vicariously. He hath overtaxed them without due representation and hath flaunted this wrong by lavishing gifts on his malignant minions at bawdy parties of Jello wrestling and nude ping-pong.

He hath betrayed the sacred trust among God Pretenders by commencing hostile actions against the peaceful folk of Jotunheim and Acroscephale without cause and for only unjust and greedy self promotion. In spite of courteous missives from the Black Iron Lord of Ulm, he hath ignored all encouragement to cease his wicked warmongering.

He hath murdered and dismembered the cute, furry bunnies known by the names of Floppy, Quiver Cottontail, Beevie, and Scootie, for the sole purpose of indulging his sadistic bloodthirstiness. He laughed when poor Scootie begged. He gathered all his malignant minions to watch while he sliced off defenseless Floppy’s ears. His sickness doth run deep.

WHEREFORE, we hereby declare THE PANTHER anathema. He is hereby irrevocably excommunicated from the Sacred Brotherhood of Uzzurbleeshewfooth.

FURTHERMORE, upon the authority granted to us by said divine fiat, we impose sanctions upon said PANTHER. No further imports or exports of goods or services shall be made from the Empire of Ulm to or from the Dictatorship of Caelum. All Caelum assets within the Dominion of Ulm are hereby frozen and seized as reparations rightfully due to the Black Iron Lord of Ulm.

This we sign upon our sacred honor:

/s/ Sir Ircon Teabiskut, High Lord Secretary of State

/s/ Sir Gullschmire Kaffeemitmilch, High Lord Secretary of the Treasury

/s/ Sir Graham Grassbahl, His Almost Most Highness