[Sedna]

Turn 28, R'lyeh

And behold I saw under the stars that the race was not to the swift, nor the strong, but to me! And, actually, I am both swift and strong. Although not as strong as I could be, mutter mutter, stupid k-nig-it mutter. The straits and the angry sea are now mine. The kracken hides in his little cottage, afraid to come forth onto the sea floor and challenge me for supremacy — and thus I wipe out the provincial defense. While some keep an eye upon the forsaken grotto, the rest of my forces fan out to collect taxes from the Atlantians who have not made it into the castle. Some may die, but you can't make a fish taco without their dead bodies.

My other force, executing the second piece of a classic pinchers attack, rolled through with nary a resistor (at least nary a one that mattered. Less than an ohm anyway...) I hear that my researchers are getting along quite well, working on the secrets of summoning magical creatures to swell my armies. I shall be glad of it. These meteorite guards are so weak and pitiful and slow. I could really go for adding a few of those coral guards to my army. Their poison-spikey armor is neat! But, they seem to all be pretty loyal, worse luck.)

And the coral guards eat so much too. Not as much as the bloody useless tritons, but still...

The rest of the world seems to remain quiet, undisturbed by my... kindness in putting these fishies to sleep. The empires of Man and Vanheim have being bragging about summoning the air to help them fight. Hah. Fat lotta good that'll do them under the waves. Under the sea... da di di dee.

Hmmm... I thought war would be more interesting. More death and destruction. More world ending in a bang and skies torn apart and moon splattered red with the blood of mine enemies. Sieging couldn't be more dull, especially since my useless troops don't seem to be able to get their fishy fingers through the cracks in that kelp fortress. Maybe if I eat a few of their tasty fingers (lightly breaded, with a delicate tomato-vinaigrette sauce) the rest of them will be motivated to siege a little faster...