[Puke]

as Douglas raises a finger to complain about not getting his way, the floor errupts from underneath him.

boards split asunder, and a giant yellow bulb surges up through the floor. The vegetable's jaws open wide, and with a snap they smash Douglas's table into spliters, as he vaults into the air.

There is a grinding and gnashing of teeth, as the enormous plant shreds the table and spreads its jaws wide a second time.

Everyone's eyes begin to water.

Douglas decends from his jump, angling to miss the creature, but it is too big. He falls into its maw, and the jaws clamp down on him, pulling him down into the floor.

Before he disappears, he is heard to say "but onions dont have jaws!"

and as he utters the word, a trap door in the ceiling opens up and dumps hundreds of normal-sized onions down upon him (which fall through the room and into the hole in the floor, dissapearing from sight)