[Growltiger]

Atrocities, I like that joke, I really do.

Texans, still think that their place is the biggest and best in the world and their idea of the epitome of culture and style is his 'n' hers possum skin bath mats

"Any how, yessiree - a Texan is part buffalo, part polecat, part cougar, part tornado, part cactus, part horny toad ( heavy on the HORNY part ), and all fire and brimstone."

So basically, you are hideously confused and with all the traits of some rather unpleasant and nasty flora and fauna!
oh and you forgot to mention being part - braggard


"Mess with the thunder of Texas and you'll call down the BOOM"

Assuming that you are not using the dutch word for "tree", I anticipate that this is a reference to Texmex cuisine and its effect on the digestive system. So basically, upset your colon and we are all going to hear a resounding blast of broken wind (or was that already evidenced by the previous highlighted comment?)

In summary, Texans seem to have most of their DNA from "ornery critters" and unpleasant atmospheric effects or flora, are prone to producing large amounts of stomach gas and have a tendency to bluster.

Sounds about right actually