[Salamander8]

My god locked himself in the basement and no one has found the keys to let him out yet.

Starspawn 1:"Our most dreadful lord and master has locked himself in the cellar, and someone drew one of those damn elder signs on it, so I can't use my otherworldly powers to get him out!"

Starspawn 2:"Did you try tricking some hapless b-movie actor into daring to explore the basment? That works in all the horror movies. And our god can devour their soul when they release them as an aded bonus."

Starspawn 1:"Yeah I tried that, but they keep drowning. That's the problem with cheap undersea real estate."

Starspawn 2:"Well, keep the slaves looking for the keys I guess. Did you try the freezer yet?"