[Renegade 13]

THE HILLBILLY VASECTOMY

After their 11th child, an Alabama couple decided that was enough as they could not afford a larger bed. So the husband went to his veterinarian and told him that he and his cousin didn't want to have any more children.

The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy that could fix the problem but that it was expensive.

"A less costly alternative," said the doctor, "is to go home, get a cherry bomb, (fireworks are legal in Alabama ) light it, put it in a beer can, then hold the can up to your ear and count to 10"

The Alabamian said to the doctor, "I may not be the smartest tool in the shed, but I don't see how putting a cherry bomb in a beer can next to my ear is going to help me."

"Trust me," said the doctor.

So the man went home, lit a cherry bomb and put it in a beer can. He held the can up to his ear and began to count...

"1"


"2"


"3"


"4"


"5"


At which point he paused, placed the beer can between his legs and resumed counting on his other hand.

This procedure also works in Tennessee, Kentucky, Texas, Oklahoma, Mississippi, Georgia, South Carolina, North Carolina, Virginia, parts of Indiana and Louisiana.

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I dialed a number and got the following recording:

"I am not available right now, but Thank you for caring enough to call. I am making some changes in my life. Please leave a message after the Beep. If I do not return your call, You are one of the changes."

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My wife and I had words,
But I didn't get to use mine.

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Frustration is trying to find your glasses without your glasses.

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The irony of life is that, by the time you're old enough to know your way around, you're not going anywhere.

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God made man before woman so as to give him time to think of an answer for her first question.

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I was always taught to respect my elders, but it keeps getting harder to find one.