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Halancar said:
Well, in impossible, the AI normally has a lot more troops than you (because they get more gold and ressources in the first place, and spend them like water on crappy troops). At which point, using their special power to know just how many troops YOU have (which is not so special, you can do the same by watching the Army Size graph), they decide that you are an easy target, and declare war. So it's not that the AI deliberately gang up on you, it's just that they all independantly decide that you are the weak link and it is time to kick you out 
You can prevent it by finding a way to match their troop number. If you can stay at their level (or better yet above), they'll mostly leave you alone. Of course, that probably means taking Order 3 and keeping a few hundred chaff at your capital doing nothing, but it does work.
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If you have large armies guarding all your borders, that is usually enough to keep them from attacking you. As far as I can tell the enemy will declare war on you only if they think they can take a province by doing so. So if you play on maps with lots of mountains you can use that to your advantage and keep the peace with a smaller army.