[Growltigga]

Right, that's it, Dogscoff, I am coming down to Bournemouth to give you a damn good punch on the bottom

I AM NOT MANCUNIAN - I am a southern boy from Kent, the Alabama of England and home of the free, land of the brave and god's own earth

I am up here in t'north ONLY because (a) my wife is from a rich Cheshire family and one has to go where the cash is and (b)the local lads are so scraggy the local totty marries southerners - the ex-pat community up here is staggering