Be on Alert:
From the Desk of the Minister of Foreign Invasions:
After a previous engagement that resulted in the complete slaughter of TC’s 2nd Brigade, including our nation’s most beloved heroes, the Three Amigos (3 abominations known for their silly death ray antics), TC is proud to announce a victory against the demonic fiends of Mictlan. After air dropping numerous flyers proclaiming the benefits of serving in a well-ordered bureaucracy with guaranteed lifetime pensions and free healthcare (including heart replacements for blood sacrificed relatives), we were able to convince a few Mictlanese to join our ranks. We also found a spell developed by an obscure TC scholar that had been languishing in the great library. That spell, Demon Cleansing, proved to be quite useful in clearing out an infestation of Mictlan’s netherworld friends.
Nevertheless, a huge force of fiends of darkness, vampires, lords of hell failed to show up for battle, disappeared from our scout’s view, and remains unaccounted for. TC’s citizens, fearing repercussions, have been told to remain indoors until these scoundrels can be located and dealt with. Any information on their whereabouts will be rewarded with a lifetime supply of delicious egg rolls.
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i crossed blades with the mightiest warriors of the golden age. i witnessed with sorrow the schism that led to the passing of legends. now my sword hangs in its scabbard, with nothing but memories to keep it warm.
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