[Growltigga]

Growltigga strides into the real cantina.

"Friends, Romans, Countrymen, lend me your ears. I have come to ask for your support in the greatest battle of them all. A crime has occurred, a crime so heinous that it makes all of Dogscoff's predilections look positively tame. The future of your beloved cantina is at stake. A foe so foul is trying to cast confusion on you all, is trying to steal our way of life and relaxation, and is trying to usurp the FBWs.

We must take up arms to defend our right to enjoy this cantina. I ask each and every one of you to join me in this crusade, to defend the free world against plagiarism, to hold back the forces of chaos and dishonesty which threaten our very existence.

Why should you fight? I hear you ask. But think friends and comrades. Think of your lives and think of the future. This is the crux, the moment, the fulcrum. This is the time where you have the ability to change the future, to influence the way things will come to pass. Think of yourselves in the future, would you be proud knowing that at this critical moment, you chose to keep out of the fight and not defend that which we love, I ask you, can you hold yourself up to be men knowing that when the call came, you chose to submit to slavery by evil forces rather than defend your freedom?

The call to arms has come, my legions are marshalled in the car park, Barry is thirsting for blood, the enemy is across the road, will you join me this fight or cower craven behind the cantina bar? PS every warrior will get a free 10,000 mineral tab....

Growltigga pulls out his claymore, checks his blue and white warpaint and hoists up his kilt

FREEEEEDDDDDOOOOOMMMMMMMMM