[Nauquan]

To the Hairless Ones Throughout the Lands of Gluttony:

The Fishies are slippery and twisty with the words. Frankly we are tired of being threatened and bullied by them. They have siezed our lands while accusing us of agression. They have published false statements about us. They have mistreated our emissaries (dressing them in motley), and, worst of all, they simply will not reveal what they look like under their robes.

In addition our Pachyderm Sychronized Swimming Troop (PSST) needs to find a practice facility. As you can imagine they need a rather large body of water - such as a river - that southeastern river would do nicely.

While we agree the wiser course would be to let Atlantis, R'leyh, and Agartha beat each other up, we are just too annoyed. In the coming months we will seek the return of our ancestor lands that were part of our nation from the first few months of our glorious rein. The lands are sacred to us. Our God, shed his blood upon them to save of those (rather wet) lands.

Of course the monkeys are always willing to listen to people from other lands. We would like nothing better then a peaceful existance where we could eat our bananas in peace. But do not send us threats. Threats make monkeys mad.

Sincerely,

The Monkeys, Snakes and Elephants

Edit: We declare war on R'leyh