There is still some discussing (everywhere) on that point. I guess so far that Desura is supposed to be the official forum but Im still trying to like it.
There is a domain
www.CoE-3.com but nothing there yet (any html volunteers?)
And there is a player-made forum coe3.ProBoards.com which is looking good.
A player-made IRC channel was started at irc.gamesurge.com channel #CoE3 and has had a few MP games already.
As to your other questions....
the command switch --rename will allow you to use the n key while viewing your commanders
the --autosave= will allow you to recover from botched orders and recruiting by creating a backup save after each "END turn"
A long right-click on a site will bring up the recruiting screen already set to be recruiting AT that site which really helps avoid botched recruiting
Trade only works if you have trade points to use. They show up in your treasury next to the tiny icon of a loaded cart. You get trade points from things like controlling a Port town (altho some nations such as Burgmeister starts with some right away)