I just came to the depressing realization that I have lost just about everything I have ever truly cared about or loved and only have to look forward to losing even more.
I lost my first new truck, 1988 Toyota 4x4. Lost it in an accident. I lost my first house, sold it because of hard economic times. I lost my first love, because I was young and stupid. I lost my first cat; still don't know what happened there. The list goes on. I miss many of these things and wish that the universe would simply grant me one request; God like powers that would enable me to do whatever I wanted, create whatever I want, bring back whatever I wanted. But that to think this is a dream, and like most dreams, they are just the delusions of the sub conscious mind at work. They are not real, nor will they ever become real. The real reality of life is that nothing Lasts. You never know how much you have until you no longer have it. Oh well, I guess this is why we have a built in fail date. Could you imagine going through time regretting the things that you have lost? Oh what a horrible depressing bummer that would be. No wonder there is only one God now, all of the others committed suicide. Any who, that is just my two cents worth. Back to my dismal depressing life of loss.
Don't get me wrong, I am not like suck on the gun barrel depresed, but rather more along the lines of just down and out over the things I now miss that I once had. Like an awsome job, a place to call my own, love of a nice woman, toys and things. You know, just the same old crap that many of use take for granted until its gone.
Oh well, time to shake off these thoughts and go frag some flag runners.
OT: Depressing Thought
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