Jokes and Riddles Centre

[Wardad]

> >Know Your State's Motto
> >
> >Alabama: Hell Yes, We Have Electricity
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Alaska: 11,623 Eskimos Can't Be Wrong!
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Arizona: But It's A Dry Heat
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Arkansas: Literacy Ain't Everything
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >California: By 30, Our Women Have More PLastic Than Your Honda
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Colorado: If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Connecticut: Like Massachusetts, Only The Kennedys Don't Own It Yet
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Delaware: We Really Do Like The Chemicals In Our Water
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Florida: Home of the headless drivers
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Georgia: We Put The "Fun" In Fundamentalist Extremism
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Hawaii: Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru (Death To Mainland Scum, Leave Your Money)
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Idaho: More Than Just Potatoes ..... Well Okay, We're Not, But The Potatoes Sure Are Real Good
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Illinois: Please Don't Pronounce the "S"
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Indiana: 2 Billion Years Tidal Wave Free
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Iowa: We Do Amazing Things With Corn
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Kansas: First Of The Rectangle States
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Kentucky: Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Louisiana: We're Not ALL Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That's Our Tourism Campaign
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Maine: We're Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Maryland: If You Can Dream It, We Can Tax It
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Massachusetts: Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden's (For Most Tax Brackets)
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Michigan: First Line Of Defense From The Canadians
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Minnesota: 10,000 Lakes... And 10,000,000,000,000 Mosquitoes
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Mississippi: Come And Feel Better About Your Own State
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Missouri: Your Federal Flood Relief Tax Dollars Hard At Work
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Montana: Land Of The Big Sky, The Unabomber, Right-wing crazies, and Very Little Else
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Nebraska: Ask About Our State Motto Contest
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Nevada: Hookers and Poker!
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >New Hampshire: Go Away And Leave Us Alone
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >New Jersey: You Want A ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto right here!
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >New Mexico: Lizards Make Excellent pets
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >New York: You Have The Right To Remain Silent, You Have The Right To an Attorney ....
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >North Carolina: Tobacco Is A Vegetable
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >North Dakota: We Really Are One Of The 50 States!
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Ohio: Home of Lake Erie and the Mistake By The Lake (Cleveland)
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Oklahoma: Like The Play, Only No Singing
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Oregon: Spotted Owl... It's What's For Dinner
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Pennsylvania: Cook With Coal
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Rhode Island: We're Not REALLY An Island
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >South Carolina: Remember The Civil War? We Didn't Actually Surrender
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >South Dakota: Closer Than North Dakota
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Tennessee: The Edjucashun State
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Texas: Si' Hablo Ingles
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Utah: Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Vermont: Yep
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Virginia: Who Says Government Stiffs And Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix?
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Washington: Help! We're Overrun By Nerds And Slackers!
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Washington, D.C.: Wanna Be Mayor?
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >West Virginia: One Big Happy Family... Really!
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Wisconsin: Come Cut The Cheese
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Wyoming: Where Men Are Men .... and the sheep are scared!

[geoschmo]

Originally posted by Wardad:
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Ohio: Home of Lake Erie and the Mistake By The Lake (Cleveland)
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sorry, this was lame. I am sure we could do so much better on this one.

Ohio: Convienently located close to several interesting states.

Ohio: You probably know someone who lived here once.

Ohio: We don't care what North Carolina says, WE invented the damn airplane.

Ohio: The "Silicon Valley" of the nineteenth century.

[ August 05, 2003, 18:25: Message edited by: geoschmo ]

[Loser]

Originally posted by Wardad:
> >Know Your State's Motto
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Colorado: If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Likewise.

Colorado: Because No One Actually Skis in Utah

Colorado: Better Than Kansas, Really

Colorado: We Have Rocks, They're Better Than Yours

Colorado: Don't Ask About the Indians

Colorado: Like You Haven't

[Erax]

Geo : I lived in Ohio when I was 1.

Loser : My dad loved Colorado. But then, he was a geologist.

[Loser]

Erax: I love Colorado, that's why I'm still here. Some time I'll rant on what it means to live in an 'At Will' State and try to express some of the real reasons I should be somewhere else. But it's a great place. I was just trying out the self-depreciating humor that Geo laid out first.

[Erax]

'At Will' ?
Sorry, my English is from the 80's. New, regional or local expressions are a bit confusing to me.

[Wardad]

Hey now, I grew up in New Jersey and I have no problem with this:

> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >New Jersey: You Want A ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto right here!
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

[Loser]

This one is a little wrong. Moderator, feel free to edit or remove it if you so desire.

Colorado: AoC at Fifteen and so Many Military Bases: What Do You Think Happens?

[Stone Mill]

Originally posted by Wardad:
Hey now, I grew up in New Jersey and I have no problem with this:

> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >New Jersey: You Want A ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto right here!
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I agree, Wardad... that's just freakin terrific.

[Wardad]

Originally posted by geoschmo:

quote:

---

Originally posted by Wardad:
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
> >Ohio: Home of Lake Erie and the Mistake By The Lake (Cleveland)
> >~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sorry, this was lame. I am sure we could do so much better on this one...

---

OK GEO,
How about
> >Ohio: 2 days of Sunshine State