Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave - Page 38

Kamog · #**371** June 17th, 2003, 06:45 AM

The girl starts mumbling answers to the Captain's questions, her eyes still closed.

"We stole the brain to be our Controller... the Controller circulates our air ... keeps the city warm ... makes the lights work ... purifies our water ... this new Controller is strong and powerful - it will run our city for many years."

"We used the trilaser connector and sonic separator to remove the brain... we learned how to do the surgery by using 'Teacher'..." (She vaguely gestures towards the metal helmet-type device.)

"And of course I do, on a first date! And on every date!

"

Growltigger · #**372** June 17th, 2003, 09:27 AM

Right, that's just what I like to hear. Mr Kamog and Mr Erax, as our resident engineering geniuses, please build a new controller for these poor young ladies. Something that will Last a good few years and make them very friendly (if you get my drift) to us.

Dr Geo, even though you seem to have lost the ability to speak (maybe it was those hillbillies), please assist our intrepid engineering crew in this.

I have a sneaky feeling that we need to do this quikly, as I am sure a klingon battle cruiser will turn up and need a good thrashing.....

and Taz, please will you stop playing with Mr S'Katchoo's controls, breakdancing is so undignified in a science officer

Raging Deadstar · #**373** June 17th, 2003, 11:52 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Kamog:
"We stole the brain to be our Controller... the Controller circulates our air ... keeps the city warm ... makes the lights work ... purifies our water ... this new Controller is strong and powerful - it will run our city for many years."

*Senator Deadstar sits back after listening in to the confession of the alien girl, but one thing confuses him. He plays the hologram back really slowly but it still syas what he thought it said!

"this new Controller is strong and powerful - it will run our city for many years"

Isn't this the bumbling, disco loving, dogscoff yearning science officer? Since when did he become strong and powerful???

*Senator Deadstar leans back in his chair and sips his drink*

Too bad that my fleet with a planet destroyer has almost arrived. I doubt even the Phong's Head could get through 3 Deadstar Battlecruisers and stop the Planet Destroyer irradicating Jean Luc Le Grand Chat and his away team!

Growltigger · #**374** June 17th, 2003, 12:27 PM

Hmmmm, thinks the great Kat, no wonder that Mr S'Katchoo's brain is great and powerful. It is completely under utilised so is almost as good as new!

I wonder how Mr Kamog and Mr Erax are doing on the new brain...

Thinks to himself, I also wonder if Mr Powerman has finished the weapons and shield upgrades to the TSSS Phong's Head. With these new modifications, we will be a match for anything, even three Deadstar Battlecruisers and a Planet Destroyer! Hell, we could even whip a load more as well

dogscoff · #**375** June 17th, 2003, 02:01 PM

Excellent. After you, sir.

*dogscoff keeps one eye trained on 'Tig at all times, acutely aware of the fact that he may soon be a target himself.

Suddenly, there is a loud crashing in the undergrowth, and a fully-grown bull mozzie charges forth. It's huge- it has to be at least a quarter of an inch long. It will make a fine trophy.

Wary of the danger such a beast could pose, 'scoff and 'Tig carefully clip armour piercing rounds into their pulse rifles, blissfully unaware of the the 8-ton rabid carnivorous dino-spider sneaking up on them from behind.

Power Man · #**376** June 17th, 2003, 05:04 PM

Power Man to Captain:

I have completed the weapon and shield upgrades. By re-routing the phasers trough the main dilithium array unit and adding in a tri-phase modulator to the main energy output I have tripled the yield at only 45.98 % the energy needs.
The shields now are triple redundant and can even use any impacting energy to rebuild themselves.
I have added extra lenses to our "All Seeing Eye" sensors this has greatly increased their "steely gaze". I have boosted your photon torpedo's yield to 274.67 % better than before.
I have also added a few additional surprises that I am just "itching to use".

I have completed the SSSS. "Nothing Un-Expected" to report. Proceeding to "Next Phase".

Oh by the way Captain. Sensors indicate that a "large Multi legged creature" is sneaking up on you from behind.

LOOK OUT !!!

Taz-in-Space · #**377** June 17th, 2003, 05:35 PM

Before the Captain and Dogscoff can turn around, they hear rapid gnawing and gulping sounds. As they finish their turn all they see behind them is Taz picking his considerable teeth with a long 'toothpick' resembling a large spider claw.

BUURRRPPPPPP!

"Nothing to see here - I just having little after-action snack to keep up my strength."

"BTW, any idea why Taz is bit tender between his legs?" asks the memory-challenged marsupial.

[ June 17, 2003, 16:40: Message edited by: Taz-in-Space ]

Erax · #**378** June 17th, 2003, 06:00 PM

Quote:

Right, that's just what I like to hear. Mr Kamog and Mr Erax, as our resident engineering geniuses, please build a new controller for these poor young ladies. Something that will Last a good few years and make them very friendly (if you get my drift) to us.

"Aye, aye, Cap'n."

Erax thinks to himself, now how am I going to do this. The controller bit is easy, all they need is air, water and heating, we can set that up in a minute. But make the young ladies friendly ? If I knew how to do that I wouldn't have become an engineer !

He looks over at Kamog. No help there, that's for sure. And Dr. Geo seems a little absent today. I guess I'll have to do things my own way.

"Erax to Power Man, I am setting up one of these medical consoles to interface with the Phong's computer, please open up a channel."

He accesses all of the female personalities the ship's computer has on file and tries to find a common denominator that would make them all 'friendly'. Suddenly he sees it !

"Erax to Power Man. Please send us the following equipment..."

Raging Deadstar · #**379** June 17th, 2003, 07:22 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Chief Engineer Erax:
He accesses all of the female personalities the ship's computer has on file and tries to find a common denominator that would make them all 'friendly'. Suddenly he sees it !

Is this computer a bit like an advanced Version of the captains little black book?

Power Man · #**380** June 17th, 2003, 07:41 PM

Boy that is some list Chief Engineer Erax. What are you putting together??

I can see were you might use a verteron pulse unit, or a master control logic box, and some of the other items.
But what are you going to do with a gross of chocolate covered tribble wings, a case of "El-cheepo" bubbling wine, and a case of raw ousters??

Any way I am sending down the stuff you wanted. Any thing else ???

[ June 17, 2003, 18:45: Message edited by: Power Man ]