MP: BonsaiKitten - Game for people who feel constricted - rockin out

[Revolution]

At war with 5 nations this early...I would have thought it was Bandar Log's behind the scenes diplomacy that has made me such a target but it seems that his lands are just as desirable as mine to the conquerors. I'm afraid there will not be room for all of you in the core of my empire, but I shall try to accommodate your armies as best I can.

[vfb]

"Commander Omacatl!"

He looks up wearily from the scrolls laid before him. "Yes, Sergeant?"

"It appears there has been somewhat of a deception, sir! Regarding the distress note attached to the arrow that impaled Private Concorde!"

Omacatl scowls. "The Princess?"

"Sir, it appears there is no Princess captive in that castle. That note was the handiwork of a million monkeys scrawling randomly. What shall we do, sir?"

"Well, damned if I'm going to march all the way back to Mictlan empty handed! A man's got his career to think of! Who holds the castle, then?"

"Sir, I'm telling you, it's monkeys, they are everywhere. There does not appear to be any sign of human inhabitants."

"Monkeys? Huh! Well, here's what we do. Send word to our capital that we have sighted the Princess, and are making preparations to storm the castle. I'll not have the Council of Couatls rob me of my chance at glory by canceling the operation!"

[Omnirizon]

Has Ossa dropped off the face of the planet?

Oceania is about to stale for the second time in a row, and rule is that twice in a row and it goes AI.... maybe we should start looking for replacement now?

[vfb]

Looks like he has not been on the boards at all for a week. Too bad, because Oceania looks like it's doing pretty well!

Maybe look for a sub for a couple days, and if that fails, AI?

[Janlm]

yeah lets look for a sub, or i'll just take the entire ocean for myself

[cleveland]

OCEANIA RECIEVES MASSIVE GOVERNMENT BAILOUT

The naton of Oceania, hit hard by the recent global credit meltdown and collapse of the subprime caviar derivatives market, has given itself a staggering 700 billion clam bailout.

Upper management has been sacked, and a new government regulator has been appointed to oversee the nation's rebuilding.

Of course rebuilding won't be easy, as the nation has been in turmoil for the last several months, and nobody seems to remember the combination to unlock the Ministry of Diplomacy. Further, 700 billion clams doesn't really help when they never really existed in the first place, and constitute a self-IOU.






Ahoy from Oceania! Hope everyone's glad the roster is refilled. Kindly PM any existing treaties Oceania is involved in, and I'll do my best to honor them.

I don't suppose anyone wants to give a quick overview of the game? Apart from this Works of Shakespeare business?

Cheers,
cleveland

[sum1lost]

It would be nice if I could actually beat any of vanheim's armies in combat, rather than just raiding the stuffing out of him.

[cleveland]

Right. So I've finally got a handle on what's going on here...

To get this economy back on track, Oceania proudly announces the opening of Water.Mart, your underwater superstore! Save big on this season's hottest trends, like a Robe of the Sea for just 25gems! Or our Frost Brands, which were recently used to slash their own price to an astonishingly low 8gems! All gem types excepted (2slaves=1gem)!

R'lyeh, are you still trading Earth gems? We'll give Nature 1:1. Unless we're supposed to be at war with you, in which case, prepare to die you alien scum. But otherwise, let's make a deal.

Speaking of which, am I supposed to be at war with anyone? Score graphs and troop distributions are a bit inconclusive. If so, you sworn enemy/enemies should also prepare to die.

As far as the disappearance of El Ex-Presidente, my best guess is that he had a Circle Master (event? merc?) but lost him to some heavy cav. Enraged & disgusted, he closed the door on the Underwater Kitties.

Cheers,
Under-Water Over-Lord

[Revolution]

You are at war with me, Pythium, just like the rest of my neighbors ^^

[cleveland]

Let it be known that, in spite of an uncomfortably thorough ravishing by Pythium's Lord of Fertility, Oceanians are in high spirits over the victory of their winged champion in the Death Match arena.

In what proved to be an unexpectedly short contest, Palasi's unrelenting dive bombing drove her only barbarian challenger from the field of battle.

Unable to hold the Champion's trident (sweet), Palasi returned home to a weeklong feast in her honor. Eating an unprescedented volume of deepfried crawfish, she left the feast in a state which admirers have described as, "morbidly obease."

Her now legendary gut is expected to open new octives in her fatal songs of suduction, though concerns about her mountainous rolls of volumptous flesh have prompted Oceania's greatest tailors to begin work on a custom mumu for their biggest hero.