Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave

[mlmbd]

Oh, a nice new place, to mess up!

mlmbd

[geoschmo]

Originally posted by Erax:
Won't your basic "Aye, Aye, Cap'n, but the engine's about had it" do ?

A Scot speaking Portuguese ? The only time I ever heard that he was saying something like "Nós perderr parra Costa Rrica. Que verrrgonia."

("We lost to Costa Rica. How shameful.")

You could be the Geordi Laforge Version of chief engineer. No accent then, but you don't get very good lines. Basically "Allright!" and "I'll get right on it." And you have to fall in love with a holodeck simulation.

Geoschmo

[Growltigger]

No, no, no, no, Erax.

The chief engineer always has to say, "the engines have just about had it Capt'n, but I will get my trusty polaron spanner oot and get you a hundred per cent more power"

Mlmbd, I have already got you down as the voice of the turbolift..

[geoschmo]

Originally posted by growltigger:
Mlmbd, I have already got you down as the voice of the turbolift..

Who are we going to get to do the "Shhh" sounds every time we go through a doorway?

Geo

[Erax]

Originally posted by growltigger:
No, no, no, no, Erax.

The chief engineer always has to say, "the engines have just about had it Capt'n, but I will get my trusty polaron spanner oot and get you a hundred per cent more power"

Not quite Cap'n, first I say "The engine's aboot had it" (the accent right ?), then you ask for more power, then I say "All rightie Cap'n, ye'll have yer power but I wouldna try to flush the toilet right now."

Geo: Holodeck simulations have their advantages, they don't age, they can change their appearance at zero cost and they don't own anything (so no need to go shopping with them).

[Growltigger]

Erax, I do like the idea of Star Trek where Scottie says "you can hav' double power on the phasers if you like Cap'n, but if you flush the electric toilet at the same time, I canna say if you wont burn oot the engines".

OK, you have got the job....

Geo, with respect to the sliding doors, I always felt that "shhhhh" was a little bit of an understatement for them. What we could do if sample a few things, and plays these when the doors open eg "It worse than that, he's dead Jim" or "It's life Jim, but not as we no it" or "We come in peace, shoot to kill" or "You canna change the laws of physics Cap'n" or even "Growltigga is the love god of the Universe"

[dogscoff]

Hey 'Tig, say what you like about Riker but at least he gets to boff a different alien bird every episode.

Hmm, should we be dividing this thread up into episodes?

*In the absence of anything useful to do, dogscoff strokes his beard and raises one eyebrow thoughfully.

[Growltigger]

Captain Slog AKA Captain Jean Luc Le Grand Chat AKA Growltigger sits in his command chair and makes a mental note to ask Engineer Erax to fit Commander Dogscoff with a remote controlled exploding collar...

Dogscoff, why are holding that apple clenched between your buttocks? judging from the way your eyebrow is raised, you are obviously enjoying it.. and have you spilled your cocoa? oh no, it a funny little fey goatee beard, you should get that shaved off, make it so

[Katchoo]

Can I be Mr S'Katchoo, the emotionally repressed Science Officer who goes to bed everynight with a picture of his Captain in his arms, weeping like a baby

(C'mon, everyone knows Spock had the hots for Kirk, don't you?)

[Growltigger]

Katchoo, whilst I fully understand why you naturally have the "hots" for such a red blooded damn fine looking muscular and heroic chap like myself (I even make statues sweat), I am afraid to inform you that I only bat from the proper wicket and if you think I am sharing my spaceship with a pointy eared repressed bi-sexual Canadian science officer, I am afraid we will have to play the old game of "stick the vulcan out of the airlock"

Actually, if you promise to only go to bed clutching and sobbing at a picture of my first officer, you have the job. I think you may be in there anyhow as the fellow seems to go round with an apple up his backside