|
|
|
|
March 17th, 2010, 09:21 AM
|
|
Lieutenant Colonel
|
|
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: Cary, NC, USA
Posts: 1,319
Thanks: 22
Thanked 51 Times in 38 Posts
|
|
Hell Explained by a Chemistry Student
My 81-year-old father sent me this, and I thought it was too funny not to share
Quote:
HELL EXPLAINED BY A
CHEMISTRY STUDENT
The following is an actual question given on a University of Washington chemistry mid term.
The answer by one student was so 'profound' that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that exist in the world today.
Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:
1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.
So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, 'It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,' and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct........leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting 'Oh my God.'
THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+
|
|
The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Annette For This Useful Post:
|
|
March 19th, 2010, 02:43 PM
|
|
National Security Advisor
|
|
Join Date: Oct 2003
Location: Helsinki, Finland
Posts: 5,425
Thanks: 174
Thanked 695 Times in 267 Posts
|
|
Re: Hell Explained by a Chemistry Student
|
March 19th, 2010, 07:24 PM
|
|
Colonel
|
|
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Kansas, USA
Posts: 1,538
Thanks: 289
Thanked 194 Times in 94 Posts
|
|
Re: Hell Explained by a Chemistry Student
I think hell must be freezing over. They are calling for 9" of snow in Kansas over the weekend. It is spring break here.
|
April 14th, 2010, 03:44 AM
|
|
General
|
|
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: R'lyeh
Posts: 3,861
Thanks: 144
Thanked 403 Times in 176 Posts
|
|
Re: Hell Explained by a Chemistry Student
Something in the same fashion by our finest minds of society that I came across recently:
More at http://cavemancircus.com/2010/01/30/...-exam-answers/
My personal favorite is the "chinese immigrant" one.
|
September 4th, 2013, 10:09 AM
|
Private
|
|
Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 9
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
|
|
Re: Hell Explained by a Chemistry Student
too good! hehe
|
Posting Rules
|
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
HTML code is On
|
|
|
|
|