I saw you've deleted your previous questions, but in case you still need them here is the answer.
you can get the official patch on the main page of the shrapnel website(this is the forum page) so basically:
http://www.shrapnelgames.com/Illwint...3_page.html(on the right) CBM1.6 is a mod which was created by members of the community so it can be found on this website. generally though it's easier to find all the mods on llamaserver(it links to threads on these forums but it's easier to find everything from there) so I recommend to check out:
http://llamaserver.net/ go to the "Map and mod browser" than click on CBM1.6 and any other mod you want(won't be useful to you right now, get used to the basics first, but later on that would be the go to place for all mods). this is the actual thread inside the forums to get the latest CBM patch(1.6), I'm giving you this because on Llamaserver there are many different CBM links so it would be confusing...
http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/showpost.php?p=710178
as for enabling private messaging, User CP->Edit Options->Private Messaging->Enable Private Messaging(tick the box)