Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave

[Taz-in-Space]

Taz, always on the lookout for new security devices, adds the following sign to all doorways throughout the ship:

,-----------,
| TO ENTER |
| HERE SAY |
| "ONIONS" |
'-----------'

That should take care of those pesky intruders!

[ May 05, 2003, 04:03: Message edited by: Taz-in-Space ]

[Gwaihir]

[OOC]

Ok, this is a pertinent question, even though it is OOC. And no, i'm not lurking, i'm checking for purposes of joining.

Just to confirm, although we are using TNG episodes, we are using original series characters, and original series color scheme, right?

[/OOC]

A crewmember walks into the bridge, pulling off his shirt as he does so, covering his eyes. He finishes removing his shirt and stops with his hand halfway to Powerman's backside.

"Uh, hey, you're not the shower knob! And, er, this isn't the shower!"

Everyone on the bridge stares at the crewmember, standing there holding his (no its not red, its blue!) shirt in his hand. They notice that the clothespin came off of his nose when he was removing the shirt, and wonder how long it will take for him to notice the smell.

"Uh, sorry guys, I thought this was . . . wait, whats that pile over there? It's rustling! is someone under there?? An what's that puddle leaking from under it? I wish i had my tricorder, but its still on my workbench . . . oh wait, lets see, those must by those vegetables from Earth, er, what is the species, uh - - oh, right . . . Allium cepa! (Well, so he got lucky, don't worry, he'll fall for it later!) I guess that puddle must be tears from that incredible sten . . . wait, where's my Anti-Sniff device ?"

He puts his hand to his nose, his eyes go wide with shock, then, true to cartoon chemistry, the effect of the smell occurs, and he's out like a light, stiff as a board, and he's made like a ship and keeled over (we mustn't let Powerman have a monopoly! ).

As he lies there, it is noticed that he has pointy ears. People on science crew might recognize him as Lt. Gwai, a science officer, who tends to be very curious, plays with gadgets waaaaay too much, and has overclocked his tricorder (among other projects he is rumored to have).

* now, could someone please cart me off to sickbay? I have an intense case of Super-Allium poisoning from those darn On . . . allium cepae!!*

[ May 05, 2003, 04:35: Message edited by: Gwaihir ]

[Kamog]

Kamog to Bridge: "Hull repairs are complete, sir. Warp engines are on line and at 100% efficiency."

Having completed his tasks for the day, Kamog returns to Holodeck #4. Noticing that #4 seems to have a power outage, he moves on to Holodeck #3.

Hey, what's this sign on the door? "To enter here say -" he almost reads the rest of it, but stops just in time, having remembered the bad experience he had a few days ago.

Kamog: "Computer, load program Kamog-Alpha-3-Epsilon-8-Gamma-14."
Computer: "That program has been deleted. Please select another."
Kamog: "How about FBW-CTW-2500?"
Computer: "That program requires command level authorization."
Kamog: "Uh, then just load whatever."
Computer: "Program loaded. Enter when ready."

Just as Kamog is about to go into the Holodeck, he hears a loud rumbling noise coming from upstairs.

That was from the Bridge! I better go up there.
... ...wow, a pile of food!

Kamog goes to the barbecue station to have some burgers.

[Katchoo]

Originally posted by Gwaihir:
[OOC]

Ok, this is a pertinent question, even though it is OOC. And no, i'm not lurking, i'm checking for purposes of joining.

Just to confirm, although we are using TNG episodes, we are using original series characters, and original series color scheme, right?

[/OOC]

OOC: From what i'm gathering along the way is that the rules are more loose than Easy Edna on the corner over there ->

Easy Edna: *HIC* "Need company tonight, big boy?" *BURP*

I don't think we've decided on uniforms, but there are characters here from TOS and TNG, so it's likely fine for you to pick whoever you want (that hasen't been taken yet) and run with it.



OOC2: Instead of Turbolifts, how about we use Demoralizinglifts! Whenever you get in one, they degrade you non-stop until your destination. And they can be voiced by the assistant-air traffic controller from the movies Airplane & Airplane 2 (the balding possibly gay white guy).

(EG) Demoralizinglift: "Where did you buy those shoes? And that shirt! God their awfull. And that haircut looks like a brillo pad that's been washed in the toilet of a mexican restaurant! Did you choose this career or did they draft you from the Sperm Donation Clinic?"

[Gwaihir]

Lt. Gwai would be all for that, and volunteer to program them too, if only he were conscious.

But as far as the narrator knows, he is still unconscious on the bridge, in a growing puddle of allium-induced tears, with his Anti-Sniff device stuck on the shirt in his hand, waiting to be carted off to sickbay . . .

And, the narrator would like to ask everyone to stop mentioning those darn vegetables! a few times was fine, he set up a nice little stand and turned a bit of profit. But now he has RSII (repeated small impact injury), and a bad back from it, and yet everyone keeps making him say onions!!

*rrrrruuuummmmbbbble . . . "
Oh N-
*narrator is buried under a pile of his own stupidity*
muffle curses in every language ever used in stories (thats a lotta Languages!) pour forth . . . and thats a real problem, since most stories with narrators are for little kids.

-this message brought to you by the society for kindess to narrators

[ May 05, 2003, 06:22: Message edited by: Gwaihir ]

[Power Man]

Captain, the "Steely Eye" sensors have reported seeing 5 small globs of unknown origin coming from the surface. They have tracked 4 leaving the area.
However they have lost the 5th one. The recent influx of On-er Allium cepa! in the ship has triggered the "Steely Eyes" water flush system. As a result scanning is down 55.987%.
I will attempt to find the missing glob as soon as I dry my "Eyes"

Gryphin : I play- er Practice with the PEE tube every day. I must say I have gotten pretty good with it.

Gwaihir : I greet a fellow Punster. Now we can double the PUNishment.

Katchoo If we did as you suggested and added programs to degrade you non-stop until your destination , we could call the Turbolifts TuboDowners.

I hope "Number 1 and his team are almost ready to "GO". The "Pressure" is building to have some "Movement" of the story line.

[TerranC]

Ensign TerranC is briefly spotted walking in the corridors before he is killed by an unknown unexplainable EPS conduit burnout, which *should* have created nothing but a mild case of goose bumps.

Another Ensign is electrocuted while trying to carry TC's charred body...