Galactic News Network -- Food For Fiction

Strategia_In_Ultima · #1 March 22nd, 2005, 12:58 PM

This is GNN.

Earlier this morning, the mental hospital The Happy Loonie admitted a new, and rather unusual and shocking patient - rumors abound, but all speculation points to one man.

It is said that the renowned graphic artist David E. Gervais has done too much SEV work lately, and has gone completely [img]/threads/images/Graemlins/icon30.gif[/img][img]/threads/images/Graemlins/icon30.gif[/img][img]/threads/images/Graemlins/icon30.gif[/img].

Rumors say Mr. Gervais demanded people to call him "King Volrek" and that he started talking to random people on the street saying such things as "Mineral planets are the best" and "Watch out for strange warp points!". He was also said to have been trying to send e-mails to "the Phong", " the Praetorian" and "the Jraenar".

More news to come.

Please stay tuned for these commercials.

AngleWyrm · #2 March 22nd, 2005, 03:12 PM

GNN, Terak Nor

Citizens are rioting over new "recruiting" policies for the Terak Nor Stellar Guard. New advances in medical science have allowed doctors to re-animate soldiers lost to battle wounds with minimum physical damage.

The reanimated dead are considered new entities by some lawyers, so that they can process death benefits for relatives, but others want the reanimated to be liable for prior debts. The undead seem to believe that they are the original person.

It is rumored that some recruiters are braying "Give your life for your country, and your debts will be wiped away." Local minister Eminence Herbert declared it to be a sign that the end is coming.

AngleWyrm · #3 March 23rd, 2005, 05:18 AM

GNN, Tantalus
Tantalus Labs recently announced a new breakthrough in genetic marker prediction of citizen behavior. Mayor Whimsley has enacted the sector's first pre-crime division, which is now responsible for all births on the planet. "Preventing criminals from being born will prevent crimes from happening," he stated at the opening ceremony.

Traveller's Advisory: Do not stop on Tantalus-II if you are expecting a child birth soon. You might be detained for legal proceedings, up to and including mandatory cancellation of non-viable citizen birth.