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April 1st, 2005, 11:27 AM
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Major
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Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Searching for a holy grail.
Posts: 1,001
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Re: Your Empire Is Going To War When:
97. Your chief diplomat has a bad case of Tourette's
98. Your on a diplomatic mission to an alien homeworld, sign a treaty then one of your super dreadnoughts gives a 21 gun salute to celebrate and gets the range slightly wrong glassing the planet below.
99. You decide to save on power costs by capturing EEE in small cages and using them like AA batteries.
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He who disagrees with me in private, call him a fool. He who disagrees with me in public, call him an ambulance.
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April 1st, 2005, 11:39 AM
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Lieutenant Colonel
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Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 1,389
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Re: Your Empire Is Going To War When:
100. You meet a Phong diplomat and hand him a thong (giggles ensue)....he doesn't have a sense of humor.
101. You've been referring to the Cue Cappa all these years as "Them dang purple bug eyed critters."
101a. You've been referring to them as "Mighty Fine eatin'"
102. You know that big ice world you destroyed just for sh## and giggles because who cares it was uninhabited anyway......yeah.....about that.
103. YOur flagship is the LEXX (anyone who's seen the series knows exactly what I mean).
104. You visit a methane breather's homeworld and begin your public address with "Man it wasn't me! and begin immature histarical laughs.
105. You give a Xi'Chung ambassador a "Terminex" gift card as a present.
106. Your alien intern accidentally spills coffee on your lap so you fire him.....out of a cannon....into the sun.
107. For april fools you send a fleet to your ally's homeworld threatening to destroy him.....then you start thinking "Well I'm already here anyway."
__________________
When life gives you lemons take them and squeeze them in life's eye until it gives you the oranges you asked for!
"If men build things to look like our penis such as towers and ships does that mean female achitects represent women having penis envy?"
A line that made me chuckle, I can't remember where I heard it I just know it made me laugh.
"I'm not really a slapper....I mainly punch and gouge."
Tammy Lee my kung fu instructor/sifu's daughter when asked if she ever slapped a boy for saying something nasty to her.
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April 1st, 2005, 11:59 AM
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Shrapnel Fanatic
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Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: USA
Posts: 15,630
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Re: Your Empire Is Going To War When:
Starhawk your on a role so I award you with this:
Click Attachment to see.
__________________
Creator of the Star Trek Mod - AST Mod - 78 Ship Sets - Conquest Mod - Atrocities Star Wars Mod - Galaxy Reborn Mod - and Subterfuge Mod.
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April 1st, 2005, 12:04 PM
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Lieutenant Colonel
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Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 1,389
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Re: Your Empire Is Going To War When:
WOOHOOO sweet 
Thanks AT!
Yeah for my first one I was going to post:
"When you meet a Phong ambassador you order your band to play the thong song." But I don't know if anyone here would remember that so
__________________
When life gives you lemons take them and squeeze them in life's eye until it gives you the oranges you asked for!
"If men build things to look like our penis such as towers and ships does that mean female achitects represent women having penis envy?"
A line that made me chuckle, I can't remember where I heard it I just know it made me laugh.
"I'm not really a slapper....I mainly punch and gouge."
Tammy Lee my kung fu instructor/sifu's daughter when asked if she ever slapped a boy for saying something nasty to her.
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April 1st, 2005, 12:10 PM
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Shrapnel Fanatic
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Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: USA
Posts: 15,630
Thanks: 0
Thanked 30 Times in 18 Posts
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Re: Your Empire Is Going To War When:
108. You have ever eaten another races diplomat.
109. Another races has ever eaten your diplomat
110. Your enemies moto is "Look Who's Coming To Dinner."
__________________
Creator of the Star Trek Mod - AST Mod - 78 Ship Sets - Conquest Mod - Atrocities Star Wars Mod - Galaxy Reborn Mod - and Subterfuge Mod.
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April 1st, 2005, 12:26 PM
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Lieutenant Colonel
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Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 1,389
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Re: Your Empire Is Going To War When:
110: If your first words to an alien race is "Where's the Head?"
110a: If your first words are "Damn you got got hit with the ugly tree!"
111. You wear a shirt saying "Proud member of PETA"
If PETA stands for "PEOPLE EATING TASTY ALIENS."
112. You were invited to the Jerry Springer show by the Xiati president and it has something to do with your daughter....
(Fixed count)
__________________
When life gives you lemons take them and squeeze them in life's eye until it gives you the oranges you asked for!
"If men build things to look like our penis such as towers and ships does that mean female achitects represent women having penis envy?"
A line that made me chuckle, I can't remember where I heard it I just know it made me laugh.
"I'm not really a slapper....I mainly punch and gouge."
Tammy Lee my kung fu instructor/sifu's daughter when asked if she ever slapped a boy for saying something nasty to her.
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April 1st, 2005, 06:46 PM
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Second Lieutenant
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Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Somewhere out there...
Posts: 432
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Re: Your Empire Is Going To War When:
By starhawk
Your Icaran
Good one. You could also say if your the Qwevlan or the Corim... (as eyt unreleased stories)
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April 1st, 2005, 07:23 PM
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Major General
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Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Floating in space.
Posts: 2,297
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Re: Your Empire Is Going To War When:
113. You notice that several ships are moving to your suns...
114. You're moving several ships to the alien's suns...
115. You trade for a star destroyer, that that person oddly had sitting on his own sun...
(fixed count)
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April 1st, 2005, 09:51 PM
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Private
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Join Date: Mar 2005
Posts: 11
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Re: Your Empire Is Going To War When:
116. You have a fleet of dreadnoughts and see a defenceless enemy colony ship
117. Somehow your fleet is destroyed by that single colony ship
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Dementis veneficus
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April 1st, 2005, 10:28 PM
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Major General
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Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: Floating in space.
Posts: 2,297
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Re: Your Empire Is Going To War When:
On a PBW game, we once had a colony ship vs colony ship battle. Neither had weapons, and both had 'Don't get hurt' strategy. My ship killed the other ship O.o Don't ask me how.
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