A Tangent: There Was A Time

Atrocities · #1 October 5th, 2005, 11:59 PM

You know there was a time when I could not wait for fall and winter to get here. To have it get dark by 5pm and stay dark until after 8am. But now I really dislike this time of year for that very reason. I don't know if it is because I now find the darkness to be depressing, rather than comforting, or if I am finally growing out of something that has shrouded my life for over five years now.

I like the light, I really do. I now hate staying up all night whereas I used to thrive on it. I want to be out and about during the day rather than hiding in my cave waiting for the darkness to come.

I fear that now that the dark season is upon us, I will fall back into that pit of despair that I have literially just clawed my way out of and won't be able to get back out.

Then again it could just be that now that I want to be out and about, the darkness cuts into my day thus making it seem like there is no time to do anything except sit in front of the PC and type tangent posts.

Where I used to love the darkness, I now find myself fearing it. This is going to be an interesting next few months. (Also it was a year ago this month that I lost my best friend. I think that has to do a lot with how I feel right now.)

Momma Kitty
1992 - 2004

Baron Munchausen · #2 October 6th, 2005, 01:29 AM

Getting depressed in the darker part of the year is not uncommon. You can buy 'artificial sunlight' lamps, you know. They can be very helpful even for people who are not 'officially' diagnosed with "Seasonal Affective Disorder" as it is called.

Fyron · #3 October 6th, 2005, 02:08 AM

There is a disorder for everything now...

inigma · #4 October 6th, 2005, 02:12 AM

such as the "Anxiously Awaiting Anything Space Empires Disorder"

maybe we should start a support group

Kamog · #5 October 6th, 2005, 02:18 AM

I find it getting increasingly difficult to get up in the morning because it's dark and my brain tells me that it's still night time so I should stay in bed.

Renegade 13 · #6 October 6th, 2005, 03:21 AM

I must say, I'm kinda like you used to be. I love the darkness. Then again, I'm usually a rather anti-social person, so that just might play a part.

Winter affects people in many different ways. Most people don't like winter, mainly due to the darkness that comes with it. Personally, I like the darkness, and I absolutely love the snow, so it's kind of a win-win situation. I know, not exactly a helpful post, is this?

EDIT: I get a URL not found on that link of yours Atrocities.

Suicide Junkie · #7 October 6th, 2005, 03:44 AM

What is really nifty, is taking a room that normally has six 40 watt incandescent bulbs.
Then replacing those with 32watt dimmable flourescents. Which means a nice light level at minimum power, and the equivalent of a thousand watts incandescent when you crank it up.

Here comes the sun!

Even though its only perhaps 1/50th the brightness of a summer day, its plenty enough to get you the antidepressant effect.

dogscoff · #8 October 6th, 2005, 06:19 AM

Some ways of dealing with winter darkness and cold:

-It's easy to get blinkered by Christmas at this time of year: There's so much focus on it in the media and from families that you can completely forget about anything beyond it, and the autumn/winter months become a painful slog toward this one day (that you're already sick of by mid-november) with absolutely nothing on the other side.[1] Therefore, spend the next month or two making plans for fully appreciating next year's spring and summer: Get online and look up local summer festivals and events to attend. Buy tickets for gigs. Contact friends and relatives and arrange visits. Then, whenever winter gets you down, you can think about what a great 2006 you will have when it's all over. Also, watching less TV and deliberately avoiding/ ignoring all mention of Christmas until at least December 1st will help you actually appreciate it when it arrives.

-Keep busy. Nothing feeds depression like having nothing to do or to achieve. If you have nothing to keep you active, find something. Work on your cooking skills. Volunteer at your local homeless shelter. Learn to play the trumpet. It doesn't matter, as long as you feel you are getting something out of it.

-Go for long walks in the cold (even if you live in a city), to get that fantastic "coming back from the cold into a warm, cosy home" feeling when you return.

-Find yourself a local pub that contains a roaring log fire and an eccentric, talkative old man with a pipe and a wet dog. Have the old man tell you his rambling and improbable stories. [2]

-Finally, if you have the cash, cheat: Fly out somewhere hot and tropical. I know for a fact that Sri Lanka is utterly glorious at this time of year. From the US you might even be able to drive to a different season- you could go visit some of our south american shrapnellers.

[1] My local supermarkets are already selling Christmas mince pies. They have an expiry date in early november.

[2] If you find the pub but not the old man, then clearly there is a vacancy for you to become the old man. Grow some crazy whiskers, develop a taste for earthy old beers and pipe tobacco, and purchase a wet dog. Plant yourself firmly at the bar, invent some rambling and improbable stories, and inflict them upon any stranger who comes within range.

Raging Deadstar · #9 October 6th, 2005, 06:55 AM

Quote:

dogscoff said:
-Keep busy. Nothing feeds depression like having nothing to do or to achieve. If you have nothing to keep you active, find something. Work on your cooking skills. Volunteer at your local homeless shelter. Learn to play the trumpet. It doesn't matter, as long as you feel you are getting something out of it.

I have to agree here! I've been a little down recently with all of my friends leaving for University and to parts unknown. I'm doing at least 10-15 hours of voluntary work a week now and it's helped, Really keeps you busy (which for me actually helps me get more than 4 hours of sleep a night), keeps your mind off things and as they say 'it's for a good cause.'

Of course, I'm starting work with the Royal British Legion in a couple of weeks doing the poppy appeal. It's going to be cold work so I'm debating about buying one of those large woolen russian hats with ear flaps and huge mittens!

Quote:

dogscoff said:
[2] If you find the pub but not the old man, then clearly there is a vacancy for you to become the old man. Grow some crazy whiskers, develop a taste for earthy old beers and pipe tobacco, and purchase a wet dog. Plant yourself firmly at the bar, invent some rambling and improbable stories, and inflict them upon any stranger who comes within range.

That....has to be the coolest suggestion I have ever heard. Had me laughing for ages.

dogscoff · #10 October 6th, 2005, 07:17 AM

Quote:

Raging Deadstar said:
It's going to be cold work so I'm debating about buying one of those large woolen russian hats with ear flaps

Yes, I have one. Thoroughly recmomended. Be sure to wear it properly though (ie with the ear flaps sticking out, so that you have the look of a permanently perplexed spaniel. )

For cool ear-flap-hattage, download the video for Groove Armada's "Superstylin'". A truly excellent song and video and hat.