OT: Funny links

[Asmala]

Hmm...

A.S.M.A.L.A.: Artificial Synthetic Machine Assembled for Logical Assassination

[Timstone]

This is just a joke, it has nothing to do with the cyborg names. BTW, this is mine:

T.I.M.S.T.O.N.E.: Transforming Intelligent Machine Skilled in Troubleshooting/Obedient Networked Entity

Now for the joke.
Disclaimer: Don't read this if you aren't sexually liberated like most of the world. Don't even try to set your eyes on this joke if you are quickly offended by something called a vibrator. I'm in no way responsible for any damage you might suffer from reading this joke.
Okay, this should protect me from anything the Moderators or visitors have to say about this joke.









As the woman passed her daughter's closed bedroom door, she heard a strange buzzing noise coming from within. Opening the door, she observed her daughter giving herself a real workout with a vibrator. Shocked, she asked, "What in the world are you doing?" The daughter replied, "Mom, I'm thirty-five years old, unmarried, and this thing is about as close as I'll ever get to a husband. Please, go away and leave me alone."

The next day, the girl's father heard the same buzz coming from the other side of the closed bedroom door. Upon entering the room, he observed his daughter making passionate love to her vibrator. To his query as to what she was doing, the daughter said, "Dad, I'm thirty-five years old, unmarried, and this thing is about as close as I'll ever get to a husband. Please, go away and leave me alone."

A couple days later, the wife came home from shopping trip, placed the groceries on the kitchen counter, and heard that buzzing noise coming from, of all places, the family room. She entered that area and observed her husband sitting on the couch, staring at the tele. The vibrator was next to him on the couch, buzzing like crazy. The wife asked, "What the hell are you doing?" he husband replied, "I'm watching the match with my son-in-law."

[Ragnarok]

R.A.G.N.A.R.O.K.: Robotic Android Generated for Nocturnal Assassination/Replicant Optimized for Killing

Interesting.

[minipol]

Real name:
B.E.N.E.D.I.C.T.: Being Engineered for Nocturnal Exploration and Destruction/Individual Calibrated for Troubleshooting

Not so cool with my Online name:
M.I.N.I.P.O.L.: Mechanical Intelligent Neohuman Intended for Peacekeeping and Online Learning

(Online learning? bweeeuurk)

[DeadZone]

Timstone said:As the woman passed her daughter's closed bedroom door, she heard a strange buzzing noise coming from within. Opening the door, she observed her daughter giving herself a real workout with a vibrator. Shocked, she asked, "What in the world are you doing?" The daughter replied, "Mom, I'm thirty-five years old, unmarried, and this thing is about as close as I'll ever get to a husband. Please, go away and leave me alone."

The next day, the girl's father heard the same buzz coming from the other side of the closed bedroom door. Upon entering the room, he observed his daughter making passionate love to her vibrator. To his query as to what she was doing, the daughter said, "Dad, I'm thirty-five years old, unmarried, and this thing is about as close as I'll ever get to a husband. Please, go away and leave me alone."

A couple days later, the wife came home from shopping trip, placed the groceries on the kitchen counter, and heard that buzzing noise coming from, of all places, the family room. She entered that area and observed her husband sitting on the couch, staring at the tele. The vibrator was next to him on the couch, buzzing like crazy. The wife asked, "What the hell are you doing?" he husband replied, "I'm watching the match with my son-in-law."

lol, heard it before, but still so funny

[Timstone]

DeadZoneMDx said:

lol, heard it before, but still so funny

I never heard of this one, it's hilarious. I like it. Keep them comming if you have a few like this.

[DeadZone]

Ok, this is an old one, I was told this when I was about 13/14 (Im 20 now, so quite sometime ago)

Again, ppl who are easily offended, turn away now

There was this woman who was pregant, and she was shot 3 times by some unfortunate mishap

Anyway, at the hospital, the Doctors said she was fine, and the bullets missed her organs and babies

A few weeks later she has tripets, 2 girls and a boy, all healthy

Well, 5 years down the line, one of the girls comes rushing out of the toilet "Mummy, Mummy, Mummy" "What, what, what?" replied the mother
"I went to the toilet and a bullet came out" said the little girl
"good, good, good"

Anyway, a few minutes later, the other little girl comes running upto her
"Mummy, Mummy, Mummy", "What, what, what?" replied the mother
"I went to the toilet and a bullet came out" said the little girl
"good, good, good"

Then suddenly the boy comes running in
"Mummy, Mummy, Mummy" "What, wha... wait a minute. Dont tell me, you went to the toilet and a bullet came out?" asked the mother
"No, no, no," said the boy "I was playing with my willy and I shot the cat"

[Timstone]

Hahaha... LOL!!!
Good one!