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July 21st, 2003, 10:44 PM
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Lieutenant Colonel
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Join Date: Dec 2001
Location: Scottsdale AZ
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Re: Jokes and Riddles Centre
A Day at the Races....
A group of 3rd, 4th and 5th graders, accompanied by two female teachers, went on a field trip to the local racetrac (Churchill Downs) to learn about thoroughbred horses and the supporting industry (Bourbon), but mostly see the horses.
When it was time to take the children to the bathroom it was decided that the girls would go with one teacher and the boys would go with the other.
The teacher assigned to the boys was waiting outside the men's room when one of the boys came out and told her that none of them could reach the urinal.
Having no choice, she went inside, helped the boys with their pants, and began hoisting the little boys up one by one holding onto their "weewees" to direct the flow away from their clothes.
As she lifted one, she couldn't help but notice that he was unusually well endowed. Trying not to show that she was staring the teacher said, "You must be in the 5th".
"No, ma'am," he replied. "I'm the jockey riding Silver Arrow in the 4th but thanks for the lift".
__________________
So many ugly women, so little beer.
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July 22nd, 2003, 01:50 AM
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Lieutenant Colonel
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Join Date: Dec 2000
Location: DC Burbs USA
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Re: Jokes and Riddles Centre
__________________
Think about it
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July 22nd, 2003, 01:54 AM
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Colonel
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Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Calgary, AB, Canada
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Re: Jokes and Riddles Centre
well, i can see the meaning, cant see the joke though
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Let the game begin!
Green bug from outa space!
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July 22nd, 2003, 03:16 AM
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Shrapnel Fanatic
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Re: Jokes and Riddles Centre
no, no, to get to the other tide!
eel's migrate overland. although usually only on marshes.
__________________
If I only could remember half the things I'd forgot, that would be a lot of stuff, I think - I don't know; I forgot!
A* E* Se! Gd! $-- C-^- Ai** M-- S? Ss---- RA Pw? Fq Bb++@ Tcp? L++++
Some of my webcomics. I've got 400+ webcomics at Last count, some dead.
Sig updated to remove non-working links.
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July 22nd, 2003, 04:09 AM
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First Lieutenant
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Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: Toledo, OH
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Re: Jokes and Riddles Centre
NASA developed a special gun to fire a (dead) chicken at high speeds to test the duribility of the space shuttle in the event of a collision with a flock of birds during flight. The French, who were at the time developing a new high-speed train, asked NASA if they could borrow the gun to test out the glass in the train's windshield. The results were disasterous. The chicken crashed through the shatter-proof glass, demolished the control panel, and imbedded itself in the back of the control room. Naturally, the French engineers were frantic and they begged NASA to help them bird-proof their train. NASA's solution was simple:
Thaw the chicken first.
[edit=splelling]
[ July 22, 2003, 04:48: Message edited by: Spoo ]
__________________
Assume you have a 1kg squirrel
E=mc^2
E=1kg(3x10^8m/s)^2=9x10^16J
which, if I'm not mistaken, is equivilent to roughly a 50 megaton nuclear bomb.
Fear the squirrel.
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July 22nd, 2003, 04:15 AM
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Colonel
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Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Calgary, AB, Canada
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Re: Jokes and Riddles Centre
lol, thats a good joke.
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Let the game begin!
Green bug from outa space!
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July 22nd, 2003, 07:19 AM
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Shrapnel Fanatic
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Re: Jokes and Riddles Centre
a man rides into town on friday, stays two days, rides out on friday.
how?
[ July 22, 2003, 06:21: Message edited by: narf poit chez BOOM ]
__________________
If I only could remember half the things I'd forgot, that would be a lot of stuff, I think - I don't know; I forgot!
A* E* Se! Gd! $-- C-^- Ai** M-- S? Ss---- RA Pw? Fq Bb++@ Tcp? L++++
Some of my webcomics. I've got 400+ webcomics at Last count, some dead.
Sig updated to remove non-working links.
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July 22nd, 2003, 07:25 AM
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Lieutenant Colonel
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Location: Orlando, FL
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Re: Jokes and Riddles Centre
Ummm...His horse's name is Friday?
__________________
The Unpronounceable Krsqk
"Well, sir, at the moment my left processor doesn't know what my right is doing." - Freefall
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July 22nd, 2003, 07:34 AM
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Shrapnel Fanatic
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Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: CHEESE!
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Re: Jokes and Riddles Centre
correct!
*gives krsqk a medal*
now, what has two wings, six eyes and eight legs?
__________________
If I only could remember half the things I'd forgot, that would be a lot of stuff, I think - I don't know; I forgot!
A* E* Se! Gd! $-- C-^- Ai** M-- S? Ss---- RA Pw? Fq Bb++@ Tcp? L++++
Some of my webcomics. I've got 400+ webcomics at Last count, some dead.
Sig updated to remove non-working links.
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July 22nd, 2003, 07:38 AM
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Major General
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Join Date: Oct 2002
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Re: Jokes and Riddles Centre
I have no idea, but it's crawling up your leg....
__________________
Of course, by the time I finish this post, it will already be obsolete. C'est la vie.
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