WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

[Kamog]

Microsoft Chicken (TM) : It's already on both sides of the road. And it just bought the road.

Java Chicken : If your road needs to be crossed by a chicken, the server will download one to the other side. (Of course, those are chicklets!)

C Chicken : It crosses the road without looking both ways.

C++ Chicken : The chicken wouldn't have to cross the road, you'd simply refer to him on the other side.

VB Chicken : USHighways!TheRoad.cross (aChicken)

OOP Chicken : It doesn't need to cross the road, it just sends a message.

Assembler Chicken : First it builds the road ...

Delphi Chicken : The chicken is dragged across the road and dropped on the other side.

Web Chicken : Jumps out onto the road, turns right, and just keeps on running.

Gopher Chicken : Tried to run, but got flattened by the Web chicken.

Lotus Chicken : Don't you *dare* try to cross the road the same way we do!

COBOL Chicken :
0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING.
IF NO-MORE-VEHICLES THEN
PERFORM
0010-CROSS-THE-ROAD
VARYING STEPS FROM 1 BY 1
UNTIL
ON-THE-OTHER-SIDE
ELSE
GO TO 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING

[couslee]

lol kamog. you shoud add Linux chicken (since these chicken threades always are somewhere

Linux chicken: it can't cross that kind of road, it need a port.

[ January 29, 2003, 07:44: Message edited by: couslee ]

[oleg]

Few more :

Machiavelli: So that its subjects will view it with admiration,
as a chicken which has the daring and courage to
boldly cross the road, but also with fear, for whom
among them has the strength to contend with such a
paragon of avian virtue? In such a manner is the
princely chicken's dominion maintained.

Hippocrates: Because of an excess of light pink gooey stuff in its
pancreas.

Thomas de Torquemada: Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out.

Timothy Leary: Because that's the only kind of trip the Establishment
would let it take.

Nietzsche: Because if you gaze too long across the Road, the Road
gazes also across you.

Oliver North: National Security was at stake.

Buddha: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken-
nature.

Salvador Dali: The Fish.

Darwin: It was the logical next step after coming down from
the trees.

Emily Dickinson: Because it could not stop for death.

Epicurus: For fun.

Johann von Goethe: The eternal hen-principle made it do it.

David Hume: Out of custom and habit.

Jack Nicholson: 'Cause it (censored) wanted to. That's the (censored)
reason.

Pyrrho the Skeptic: What road?

The Sphinx: You tell me.

Mark Twain: The news of its crossing has been greatly exaggerated.

Molly Yard: It was a hen!

Chaucer: So priketh hem nature in hir corages.

Wordsworth: To wander lonely as a cloud.

The Godfather: I didn't want its mother to see it like that.

Blake: To see heaven in a wild fowl.

Othello: Jealousy.

Mrs Thatcher: This chicken's not for turning.

Kafka: Hardly the most urgent enquiry to make of a low-grade
insurance clerk who woke up that morning as a hen.

Swift: It is, of course, inevitable that such a loathsome,
filth-ridden and degraded creature as Man should assume
to question the actions of one in all respects his
superior.

Macbeth: To have turned back were as tedious as to go o'er.

Whitehead: Clearly, having fallen victim to the fallacy of
misplaced concreteness.

Freud: An die andere Seite zu kommen. (Much laughter)

Hamlet: That is not the question.

Donne: It crosseth for thee.

Constable: To get a better view.

[Wardad]

more chickens:

http://www.geocities.com/chikenzdance

[Ragnarok]

Originally posted by Wardad:
more chickens:

http://www.geocities.com/chikenzdance

Oh my, Hampsters were bad enough. Now we got chickens... Great, just great.

[Wardad]

from: http://www.whydidthechickencrosstheroad.com/

------------------------------

"Three-Legged Chickens"

A man was driving along a freeway when he noticed a chicken running alongside his car. He was amazed to see the chicken keeping up with him, as he was doing 50 mph. He accelerated to 60, and the chicken stayed right next to him. He sped up to 75 mph, and the chicken passed him. The man noticed that the chicken had three legs. So he followed the chicken down a road and ended up at a farm. He got out of his car and saw that all the chickens had three legs. He asked the farmer, "What's up with these chickens?" The farmer said "Well, everybody likes chicken legs, so I bred a three-legged bird. I'm going to be a millionaire." The man asked him how they tasted. The farmer said, "Don't know, haven't caught one yet." (Molly - Ohio/USA)

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more...

Q: Why did the chicken run across the road?
A: There was a car coming.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road halfway?
A: She wanted to lay it on the line.

Q: Why did the rubber chicken cross the road?
A: She wanted to stretch her legs.

Q: Why did the Roman chicken cross the road?
A: She was afraid someone would caesar!

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To prove to the possum it could actually be done!