NBC NEWS
SACRAMENTO, CA
Today, yet another hopeful has thrown his hat into the ring, as a local college student who is known only as "Imperator Fyron" announced his candidacy for state governor. We now bring you live to the scene, as Mr. Fyron makes his address:
Fyron: "...and thus I pledge to bring orderly rule to the great state of California!"
Crowd: CHEER!!!
Reporter: Mr. Fyron, may we have a few words with you, now that you have announced your candidacy for governor?
Fyron: Certainly, ask away.
Reporter: Well, first, may I ask why you have decided to enter the gubernatorial race?
Fyron: I think that California needs someone who can lead the state with a firm but fair hand - just ask anyone in any PBW games I've run.
Reporter: PBW games?
Fyron:
http://seiv.pbw.cc, check it out, it's a lot of fun.
Reporter: Uh, right. Now there are a lot of "big-name" candidates in this race - Arnold Schwarzenegger, Gary Coleman, and all the rest. Is going up against them an intimidating experience?
Fyron: Actually, I'm not too worried about them; the person I'm most worried about is Aaron Hall - he just declared his candidacy Last Tuesday, and already he's swayed three million voters by promising the entire state a free copy of Starfury once he's elected. And somehow I can't shake the feeling that I somehow owe this guy something, that I wouldn't be where I am today were it not for him...
Reporter: All right... speaking of where you are today, why WOULD you want to run for governor of California, given your current status?
Fyron: (chuckle) Oh yes, the "Ruler of the World" thing... trust me, it's not as great as it's cracked up to be; California's a much nicer place... and bigger, too!
Reporter: haha, yes, that may very well be so... one final question, some fringe Groups have this theory that you are really an extraterrestrial; would you care to comment on that?
Fyron: An extraterrestrial? Now why would anyone believe that? Why, do I LOOK like a twelve foot tall arthropodic creature from the planet Antares Prime, who just happens to be using Darlok cloaking technology to blend in with the -- oh, xnarf...
(At that moment, some witnesses claim to have seen Imperator Fyron blink out of existence, to be briefly replaced by a tall, brown, skeletal figure, which then disappeared in a puff of smoke.)
edit: whoops, I said who I was voting for
[ August 24, 2003, 23:36: Message edited by: Ed Kolis ]
Fyron for Governor!
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