Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave

[Growltigger]

Captain Slog, stardate 08.54 GMT, my brave away party are assembled in the transporter room. It does my heart proud to see the chaps standing there ready for anything and as focussed as a kittne in a feather factory. Whatever happens to us on the planet, I know that the honor of the Galactic Federation will be upheld. I am impressed at their ingenuity, my engineer has even bought a bunch of flowers in case the mysterious young totty who stole S'Katchoo's brain can be wooed that way. Nice touch..

Mr Transporter operator, beam us down.

The away team appear on a frozen, miserable looking rocky landscape, half in shadow and looking as forlorn as the Last puppy in the shop window.

Mr Power Man, please give us bearing to those life signs you discovered earlier on. Commander Dogscoff, please take tricorder readings of our immediate surroundings.

Mr Power Man, please ensure that the TSSS Phong's Head is at red aler and is ready for full planetary assault mode. I want a phaser strike on a second's notice should any horrible vanesa feltz clone thingies turn up...