Well, with your example "A little bit dead", dead is, as you've said, an absolute. Therefore, adding a qualifyer onto the statement is superfluous, as you pointed out that "A little bit dead" means (essentially) the same as "Dead". In English, the superfluous bits, in this case "A little bit" are usually discarded, therefore if someone said "A little bit dead" that would be improper English.
Oh, and have you noticed (as a native English speaker) that some things just seem grammatically "wrong"?? Usually, if it seems "wrong" (such as in the case of "A little bit dead") there is some incorrect grammar in the statement, paragraph, etc. Some people theorize that this sense of "wrongness" is consistent with the existence of a "language sense" that allows people to learn languages with relative ease.
EDIT: Sorry for all the quotation marks, but it seems they are necessary for the point to be made.
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Re: OT: Qualifying Absolutes
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