Well, let's take your word, but please give more precise questions...
First it's not even remotely possible to lose "in a couple of turns", it takes at least 10 turns to have an enemy army storm your capitol.
Then read the demo tutorial if you've lost the manual, go to the wiki page, look at the links to have other Dom3 or Dom2 advice (90% of it still applies, except nation specifics), and try again
