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  #111  
Old January 2nd, 2009, 11:39 AM
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Default Re: BonsaiKitten - Game for people who feel constricted - rockin out

A glorious day in Oceanian history!

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In the most pivotal battle of the Alien Wars, Oceania's ragtag band of waterbreating misfits delivered a crushing upset to the mind-bending juggernaut known as R'lyeh.

Having suffered defeat after defeat, and losing most of their heroes to mind-hunting sniper fire, Oceania's generals decided to make a possibly final stand in the Pharaexian Sea.

With a force that consisted mainly of knife-wielding tritons, the Oceanians poured fourth from the gates of the mighty Pharaexian Citadel to meet the approaching tenticled horde.

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But this was not to be a usual engagement. To the surprise of the Starspawn, our ichtysatyrs would not be paralyzed; our triton knights would not be enslaved. No, this time Lugal - a Lizard Shaman with a hatred of aliens and a snorkel - was present on the field. Gripping the latest edition of "The Oceanian Journal of Enchantment," Lugal took advantage of the Banner of the Northern Star waived by R'lyeh's rear guard and fortified the minds of the Oceanian column with a thick layer of Antimagic.

With the mind-altering powers of the R'lyean artillery now neutered, the Oceanians charged headlong into the bristling tridents of the Meteroite Guard formations. Casualties were heavy, as expected, but the troops knew they need only hold out for 5 minutes of combat. Inspired by the words of a cadre of high-ranking religious officials, the line held.

It was at this moment that the Oceanians played their offensive trump card, and huge sharks suddenly began appearing all over the battlefield with a thirst for alien blood. The Starspawn, exhausted from their futile attempts to enslave the determined Triton Knights, had little left to throw against the ever increasing feeding frenzy.

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The Meteorite Guards were quickly surrounded: tritons to the front, sharks to the rear. When their line broke, chaos ensued, and the resulting bloodbath brought only more of the undersea predators. In desperation, the Illithids were ordered into the fray, but were torn to pieces by the hungry beasts.

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In the end, the real victory was not on the field, but in the minds of the BonsaiKittens. For Oceania has proven she yet has some fight left in her, and that the R'lyeh-Shinuyama alliance can be defeated. World leaders, whose wisdom forbade them from entering a fight on the losing side, now see that passivity is no longer necessary, and prepare their troops for battle against the samurai.

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  #112  
Old January 2nd, 2009, 03:48 PM

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Default Re: BonsaiKitten - Game for people who feel constricted - rockin out

There's at least a defacto Mictlan-Oceania alliance. This current defeat only reinforces my assertions of early: R'yleh is not the threat that Oceania and Mictlan want the world to believe it is. R'yleh is a paper tiger at best, and a complete Oceania-fabrication at worst. I'd vouch for the latter.

Mictlan is the real threat here and Shinuyama and R'yleh will be fighting a losing war if the rest of the world doesn't join in against them. Don't let their "we only want balance" pandering fool you. Mictlan has been maneuvering to maintain their power while creating distractions from it for a year now. They were very eager to demonize R'yleh and had been planning to invade for a long time. The only reason they've pulled that punch is because they realized Shinuyama was aiming for a chink in their armor by not playing along. Had Shinuyama chosen go with the group and invade R'yleh instead then we'd be hearing a very different story from Mictlan.
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  #113  
Old January 2nd, 2009, 08:21 PM
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Default Re: BonsaiKitten - Game for people who feel constricted - rockin out

What a pack of lies the Bakemono tell. How exactly had Mictlan been planning on invading R'lyeh? With my 5 Jade Serpents? I'm sure that invasion would have gone swimmingly.

Mictlan had threatened R'lyeh to stop their attack on Oceania, in the hope that the oceans would not be united under the Starspawn's rule, because hey, scary void monsters. No need to rehash all that. We could only threaten R'lyeh on land. When that threat failed, Mictlan tried to bribe R'lyeh into a peace deal. That failed too.

The Bakemono sorcerers are weaving a twisted tale to make excuses for their acquisition of the former lands of Oceania, that's all. And they would like Mictlan's lands next, and what better way to do that then to promote a gankfest on Mictlan?

Mictlan only has a few more provinces than Shinuyama now. There is no need for the petty jealousy of the Bakemono. The Bakemono have their own Enchanters, and combined with the extensive paths of their Sorcerers, they could do their own site-searching, and improve their gem income.

Mictlan has tried all diplomatic options to dissuade R'lyeh from the Oceanic war, and failed miserably.

But valiant Oceania fights two enemies: R'lyeh in the water, and Shinuyama on land. Mictlan is impressed with the valiant efforts Oceania is making, and on turn 49 Mictlan will have the opportunity to assist Oceania, by distracting Shinuyama from their aggressive takeover of the Oceanic lands.
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  #114  
Old January 4th, 2009, 09:33 AM
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Default Re: BonsaiKitten - Game for people who feel constricted - rockin out

Bah. My brother just asked to borrow my laptop. I'll definitely get it back & my turn in tonight, but could the timer be bumped back a small bit?

Sorry,
cleveland
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  #115  
Old January 4th, 2009, 07:22 PM
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Default Re: BonsaiKitten - Game for people who feel constricted - rockin out

Mictlan would like to discuss NAP timing with Shinuyama. We have heard tales of far-off lands wracked by dispute over when attacks are allowed at the end of a NAP. It's our opinion that this month is only turn 48, which means that it is not yet okay for either army to give orders to invade, should either Mictlan or Shin desire to do so.

Does Shinuyama agree that's correct?

-- Mictlan
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  #116  
Old January 5th, 2009, 02:26 PM

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Default Re: BonsaiKitten - Game for people who feel constricted - rockin out

that's what i was expecting too. shinuyama agrees.
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  #117  
Old January 5th, 2009, 04:56 PM
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Default Re: BonsaiKitten - Game for people who feel constricted - rockin out

Now that the details are cleared, ermor whishes Mictlan and Shinuyama a nice and long and very bloody war.
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  #118  
Old January 5th, 2009, 09:39 PM
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Default Re: BonsaiKitten - Game for people who feel constricted - rockin out

Mictlan thanks the Bakemono for being such an honorable nation and not engaging in any nefariousness or sneakiness during the NAP expiry period. We do believe your stories about Mictlan's power are exaggerated. We formally retract any accusations of Sinuyama telling lies. Rather, we believe they are overly pessimistic, and they underestimate their own might.

We also thank Ermor for injecting a little dark humour into the discussion.
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  #119  
Old January 6th, 2009, 12:20 PM

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Default Re: BonsaiKitten - Game for people who feel constricted - rockin out

when you say stories of Mictlan's power are exaggerated, you must mean that you've only got about 100 vine ogres, eagle warriors, and jag warriors in each and every one of our border provinces, and only about 600 in each province bordering to the two or three where I've actually got a few troops on the ready.
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  #120  
Old January 6th, 2009, 07:33 PM
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Default Re: BonsaiKitten - Game for people who feel constricted - rockin out

It is not your fault. Your scouts are probably paid on commission, so they are inflating the numbers. Unless you mean that combined I've got a total of 100 units, mostly Eagles, a few Jags thrown in, and a very small sprinkling of Vine Ogres.

In order that you may see exactly how pathetic my armies are, Mictlan will perform some parades and maneuvers on or near or in your border territories. Since we are performing these display maneuvers uninvited, you should probably consider this a declaration of war.

It looks to us like you're planning on executing similar parades and maneuvers too.

We are selling cheap popcorn to all spectators, so Ermor and you other guys who like to watch a little bloodshed, don't forget to send some scouts to watch the festivities!
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