Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave - Page 14

Growltigger · #**131** May 1st, 2003, 05:58 PM

Captain to first officer, Ryker, sorry Scoffo you utter oik, get a cleaning crew into the captain's ready room immediately, I appear tobe buried under a pile of sweaty naked orion green-skinned dancing girls, as well as a pile of shallots...

hang on, belay that order, give me a hour before you send in the cleaning crew, something here needs to be probed deeply....

snicker snicker

Power Man · #**132** May 1st, 2003, 07:43 PM

Power Man resets his Large, Powerful, Amazing, Long, Phase Energy Pistol and gives that bloody vulcan (TM) numpty-head a �Brief� shot in the backside.

�Boy I am glad the Captain did not see that it was I who was controlling the armada of huge menacing space dreadnoughts heading toward the TSSS Phong's Head.
I mean we were only.. uh � Practicing our Space Combat lessons.. Ya that�s it.
We were not PLAYING !! �

Putting the ship into PARKing Orbit Power Man asks Mr S'Katchoo , � Hay I just got a beta copy of Space Empires: Starfury for the Holodeck. I hear that Holodeck Four in available. How about we go down and get in some more �Practice�?

Power Man pushes a button on the controls. A large green light starts flashing. The light is labeled �Designated Driver Device�. There, I�m ready. Lets go have some fun Play� er Practicing.

Katchoo · #**133** May 1st, 2003, 08:48 PM

Science Officer S'Katchoo turns away from his Science Station to answer.

Mr S'Katchoo: "Starfury? That game has proven to be vastly subpar to the much better designed Master of Orion 3."

At that moment a vast intelligence stirs...

Power Man · #**134** May 1st, 2003, 09:00 PM

MOO 3 !!! I heard that the game is SO BAD even the COWS don't like it !!

If you don't want to join in a game of Starfury me I guess I will just have to go to the holodeck and Play with it by myself....

At that moment a vast intelligence moans ....

(insert Trek "Unknown Danger " music here)

Katchoo · #**135** May 1st, 2003, 09:15 PM

Mr S'Katchoo takes a new piece of tape out and tapes his eyebrow even higher to express his surprise at PowerMan's response.

Mr. S'Katchoo: "Very well. I will join you for some "practice". Although i'm certain my combat skills will diminish from the experience."

Mr S'Katchoo folds up the chair he's been using on the bridge and takes it with him as he accompanies PowerMan to the turbolift.

Elsewhere, a vast intelligence whistles while reading a copy of Naussicans Monthly in a SuperEvolved bathroom...

Taz-in-Space · #**136** May 2nd, 2003, 05:57 AM

Just as Taz was about to give the female raider some particularly deep -ahh- probing questions, the intercom tells him that he is required to report for an away mission.

Taz gives the prisoner a bottle of the bubbly and the complete collected works of the Three Stooges to keep her occupied.

Now where was that pistol? There it is!
Taz picks up a pistol like that Last used by Jim Carey in The Mask (You know - the one with eleventy-dozen barrels and attached rocket launcher) and grabbing his ACME gas mask, whirls out the door.

Taz is on his way!

Ooops. I mean: Taz is on his way, SIR!

[ May 02, 2003, 05:06: Message edited by: Taz-in-Space ]

Kamog · #**137** May 2nd, 2003, 06:19 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Erax:
Computer, please switch off Holodeck Four. Liuetenant Kamog, quit yer fooling in there and take over patching the hull."

Yes, Sir!

Kamog goes to the duplicator and produces several rolls of Duct Tape. OK, now. I'll get that hull fixed up in no time.

Gwaihir · #**138** May 2nd, 2003, 07:48 AM

[OO(NE)C] (out of (non-existant) character)
Duct tape RULES THE WORLD!!!

In response to "love holds the world together," my younger sister once replied, "no, it doesn't - duct tape holds the world together!"
-I have trained her well . . .

-- An appreciative lurker. (BTW, any of you hang out at the Ambrosia forums? (EV:Nova is being ported to PC! YAY!) They have some great cantina-esque threads - - Leviathan Cruise Lines http://www.ambrosiasw.com/webboard/F...L/008044.html# (now over) and Bright Star Station http://www.ambrosiasw.com/webboard/F...L/009764.html# (new)

[/OO(NE)C]

Growltigger · #**139** May 2nd, 2003, 12:35 PM

Captain to ship's compter, Mabel, please locate Mr Power Man, he is in holodeck 4 with Mr S'Katchoo? good, please send 10,000 volts through holodeck 4 and then tranpost them both back to their stations on the bridge.

We shall have some discipline on this ship. Computer, sound yellow alert. I want this ship ready for anything in case the away team meets trouble on Fart Point.

Gwaihir, no lurking in this thread whilst the TSSS Phong's Head is on Yellow Alert, unless you fancy donning a red vest and joining the away team on the planet as an expendable, I mean, useful member of the security detail.

Arm phaser banks Mr Power Man, Mr S'Katchoo, please ensure that our anti-sniff field is at full strength, Commander Kamog, please ensure that the warp engines are on line and ready to go at a moments notice.

I have a bad feeling about this. We shall have to wait for Commander Dogscoff to report....

The Captain sits in his command chair, staring at Patsy the PVC Communication officer and waiting for a report from Commander Dogscoff.....

Katchoo · #**140** May 3rd, 2003, 06:01 AM

Mr S'Katchoo unfolds his chair and takes his seat at the Science Station.

Anti-sniff field? Mr S'Katchoo doesn't see any such device on the board. The Captain's been sleeping in the Warp Exhaust Chamber (re: Bathroom) again, muses S'Katchoo.

Mr S'Katchoo is the creative sort though, so he replicates several hundred clothespins. With pins in hand, Mr S'Katchoo visits every member of the Ship and clips the pins on everyones noses.

Lastly, Mr S'Katchoo visits Barry in Cargo Bay 4. After a Velveeta Mind-Melt, Mr S'Katchoo clips a giant novelty pLastic clothespin, which he obtained in the Dollar Store on Deck 16, onto Barry's giant schnozz.

One quick trip in the turbolift later and Mr S'Katchoo is back on the Bridge.

"The Anti-Sniff Field is up, Captain."