Once Upon The Stars (Updated 08-22-04)

[Siegebreaker]

Atrocities, I think it was not a good idea to post your work on that sci-fi site.
I mean, they look at "the way you tell the story", while I think most people here look at the story itself.
Now we have to wait longer because your work have to be up to the higher standards of those people over there.

On the other hand, its good for you from a writter's point of view. Professional criticism can indeed help you to reach a higher level of storytelling.

But on the other hand, it might seem as a task too heavy to write up to those standards, and it may actually make you lose interest on the story, which would be our lost, not theirs.

But then on the other hand....ok, I have no more hands.

[ February 27, 2004, 19:05: Message edited by: SB ]

[Atrocities]

Thanks SB.

I wanted to do a rewrite in order to focus the story more tightly and give some more back ground on the characters. Basically give the story more substance.

I have not been to that sight in many many months. I don't even have a link any more.

[Atrocities]

Part XXX

By Gods Good Graces

Segment C

“What do you need us to do Captain?” Asked Jellico quietly.
Hess looked deadly serious as he spoke, “I want to go back to Discovery Base and rescue the people we left behind.”
Chad sat back slowly as did Jellico. “What do we do about them being buried under the Ice? How do we get them out?” Chad asked.
Hess looked at them both and smiled wickedly. “Why we steal some explosive and bLast them out.”
“You have got to be kidding!” Jellico said a bit more loudly than he had intended, but no one looked over at them. He leaned forward again and continued in a much quieter voice. “The launch has already begun, we have maybe a couple of hours at best.”
“Then we had better get going.” Replied Hess.
“We will be court marshaled for this.” Jellico Said as he looked at both men.
“Maybe so, but I am not going to leave the General there to die.” Hess was determined and both Jellico and Chad could see it.
“I can’t speak for Chad but count me in.”
“Count me in to.” Said Chad.

Tom was still in a lot of pain from his wound but was now sitting up. Harris had hobbled outside to see if he could find anything that they could use to send out a signal or use to get out of this place before it was destroyed by a tactical nuke.

“How much time do you think we now have?” Asked Nina as she sat quietly sipping a cup of cold Lacto Berry juice.
“I would say about an hour or less.” Replied Tom solemnly.
“When I signed on with Dr. Mentor, I had no idea that I would be atomized by a nuclear weapon a year later.” Nina said wittingly. She was a very lovely women, beautiful of both mind and body. She had a good sense of humor to boot, and the personalty to accept a situation without losing control of her emotions. Tom could not help but like her.
“Its not how I pictured myself going out either.” Replied Tom with a smile.
“Tell me General, is it true that you’re the man who ended the Great War?”
Tom looked down then slowly back up slightly embarrassed that she would know of his past while he knew nothing of hers.
“I played a part in it yes.” He replied with some hesitance in his voice.
“Tell me about it.” Asked Nina.
“It’s a long story.”
“Well we have about an hour to kill, is that long enough?”
Tom smiled at her with admiration. She was an attractive women and Tom promised himself that if they made it out of this alive, he would buy her dinner in the finest restaurant in the Capitol city.
“I knew him, Devon Gore, that is.” Tom Started. “At the battle of Camellia, I was a Captain in the Praetorian Republic, I had just destroyed the Global Alliances largest Carrier the Tempest when my fuel reserves expired and I had to make a crash landing. Not long after that I was captured by Alliance ground forces and taken aboard the Prometheus, King Gore the VI’s flag ship. They through me into the brig after a preliminary beating. I could hear the ships firing at the city and I knew that it was only a matter of time before the Governor surrendered the city. We had put up one hell of a fight, taken many of their ships down, but in the end, they simply out numbered us.”
Tom took a sip from his own cup of cold lacto berry juice before continuing.
“It wasn’t long before I was taken to meet my old friend. They dragged me onto the bridge and dropped me on the deck right in front of him as he sat in a command chair that look a lot like a thrown.”
Tom was lost in thought as he told his story, it was as if he could remember it so clearly in his mind that it seemed as though he had gone back in time and was now reliving the moment as if it were all new.
Gore laughed sinisterly at Tom as he lay before him on the deck at his feet. “You look horrible Tomas.” He said sarcastically. “I should have had my men clean you up for this glorious occasion.”
Tom looked on as Gore slowly stood, arms out stretched in an upward fashion forming with his body a big “W”. Without warning Gore knelt to one knee and brought his face to within an inch of Tom’s. As he spoke, he spat the words at Tom with hatred. “I have beaten you, and now I am going to obliterate your precious city.”
Tom looked to his side and out the forward viewing port and could see that they were at station keeping just outside the city of Camellia. Tom attempted too looked away but Gore grabbed his chin and forced him to look.
“Look at my wrath unleashed!” He spat at Tom as they looked upon the once proud Capitol city of the Praetorian Republic. “Soon your precious city will be burned to the ground and you, my old friend, will spend the remaining years of your life rotting away in the hell of my dudgeons!”
With that Devon forcibly pushed Toms head downward, released him and stood. Tom looked up as he began to raise himself into a kneeling position. “You think by killing millions of innocent people you will force me into accepting you as a God, and forgive you for betraying us all?”
Devon had returned to and was now sitting cross legged on his thrown.
“I am a God, and I need not your forgiveness only your obedience.”
“You many win this war Devon, but you will never be worshiped as a God!” Tom’s tone was one of utter contempt.
Gore looked equally as contemptuous as he spoke.
“In the end I will be worshiped, or I will burn this planet to a cinder and wipe clean the filth that has contaminated my world once and for all.”
“You’re mad!” Hissed Tom as he quicky came to his feet and was stomach punched by the rifle butt of one of his Alliance guards. It hurt like hell, and it drove him down on one knee but he never took his eyes off of Gore.
“Now behold my power.” Gore said magnanimously. “Prepare to fire the Tactical Nukes.”
“NO!” Screamed Tom as he lunged for Gore. The two Alliance guards that were guarding him reacted instantaneously by slammed him face down onto the deck. The force of the blow drove the air from his lungs leaving him gasping and nearly unconscious.
Then, without warning, the ship shuddered violently and the bridge lights went out. Tom looked up but could only see one of his guards through the darkness. He knew that he had but one chance to end this, so with every fiber of his being he raised himself off of the deck and struck the first guard in the groin as hard as he could. The Man let out a yelp and crumpled to the floor. Not wasting a second Tom seized the fallen guard’s rifle and shot the second guard in the face. It was a lucky shot, not aimed, the man’s head simply exploded in a burst of red. The lights on the bridge had gone to combat red as the ship shuddered again and sounds of explosions filled the air. Gore had focused his attention on the ship’s command crew and had not noticed the struggle between Tom and his guards. The second guard’s body fell onto the deck with a dull thud and Tom took the pistol from the dead mans hand and started to slowly stood. Gore was still focused upon his bridge crew, and was barking orders and did not notice that Tom had stepped up beside him until the cold barrel of the pistol touched his head. Gore stopped mid sentence, his eyes opening wide as Tom whispered in his ear, “Give my regards to you’re farther you son of a *****!” And then fired the pistol.
Gore jerked violently to one side and then never moved again. Tom looked out across the bridge of the ship, his gun pointed forward, blood covering his face and forearm, he yelled so all could hear.
“Your King is dead!”
The ship continued to shake violently but no one moved.
“This war is over! It ends here and now!”
Tom’s voice was harsh, the smoke that was rapidly filling the bridge was acidic and it hurt to breath.
“YOU!” Tom pointed the pistol at the senior commanding officer. “Order a cease fire now!” The man looked stoic as he stood there refusing to move. Tom shot him in the chest and then pointed his gun at the next officer who immediately understood what was no expected of him.
Without hesitation the man nodded toward the communications officer who carried out the order to cease fire.
Within an hour the ship was occupied by forces of the Praetorian Republic, the was over, and Captain Tom Christopher was on the fast track to becoming a legend.

As Tom finished the story he tried to stand and quickly regretted it. Nina was at his side, offering support before he even realized it.
“Was he a good friend?” She asked softly as she supported him.
“Devon was my best friend at the Academy. The man I killed that day was not the man I knew.”
“He was a monster that one.” Nina said without remorse.
“Yes he was.” Tom said slowly.
Tom thought for moment, there was something else, some familiar now. He looked into Nina’s eyes and decided to share with her something that he has never told anyone about that day. “That day I saw something that until today I thought was just my mind playing tricks on me.”
“What?” She asked in softly spoken supportive way.
“In the darkness of that bridge, to one side, something caught my eye. For an instant I thought I had seen a man standing near one of the bridge exists, he appeared and then disappeared all in the same instant. I brushed it off like I said thinking it was just my mind playing tricks on me, but now.” Tom’s voice trailed off as Nina looked at him and said with some sense of shock, “Orata!?”
Tom just looked at her and smiled. “I don’t know.”

Just then Harris burst into the room, nearly falling as he tripped from hobbling to fast on his broken leg. “A Prowler is coming!” He yelled excitedly.

A minute later they were all standing out side watching as the great black bird landed not more than a hundred yards in front of them. They needed no prodding to move toward it as the boarding ramp began to lower and Captain Richard Hess became visible. Tom was not at all surprised to see Richard, his aid, as he came running down the ramp yelling at them to hurry up.

As soon as they hit the ramp the Prowler began to ascend. They had not even taken seats when the craft was at full throttle moving away from Discovery Base.

Less than thirty minutes later Discovery Base was nothing more than a mushroom cloud rapidly reaching skyward. The Prowler had just barely out ran the bLast wave that could have easily destroyed it when Tom leaned over to Richard and softly said. “The next time you come to the rescue Captain, be sure to bring along some hot lacto berry juice.” Both men laughed and hugged as well as friends and officers could do.

[ March 01, 2004, 06:05: Message edited by: Atrocities ]

[Atrocities]

The story pre-dates 2400.0 yes.

The game is based off of the Conquest mod, not yet released. Weapons work differntly in this mod. CSM's are not tactical nukes, they are conventional explosives so a tactical nuke is far more explosive than any level of CSM.

[Siegebreaker]

The description for CSM says "Heavy duty missile with a nuclear warhead", if I recall correctly.

I always thought it was nuclear because conventional explosives should do little damage to a year 2400 ship of any kind, since they would suppossely be shielded against meteorites, radiation, and so on.
Even today great advances are being done in low weight tubular materials. Both the US and China have developed materials that suppossely are stronger than steel, though we will not know for sure until the so-called FCVs become operational in the near future, partially replacing the current Abram tanks.

What I mean its that I always thought that any ship in SE4 was armored in comparison to our standards today, and the armor components were armored to the year 2400 standards, thus explaining why a corvette/escort class ship without armored components could take a couple direct hits from CSMs with nuclear warheads, as the in-game description says the are.

[Atrocities]

Again, the story pre-dates 2400.0 and the story is based off of the Conquest mod, not yet released. Physics of that mod work differntly and given the fact that they have not yet discovered, or re-discovered space travel, neucler weapons are all they have at the moment. Crude and effective.

CSM my have neucler war heads, but they could be low yeild or even neucler waste by products like depleted urianium. Just a thought.

[Siegebreaker]

Originally posted by Atrocities:


CSM my have neucler war heads, but they could be low yeild or even neucler waste by products like depleted urianium. Just a thought.

Well, I guess every player will think diferently of the strenght of SE4 weapons in comparisson with todays arsenal.

I think the CSMs are really nuclear, and even more powerful than todays nukes, because a few of them can glass a colony with several millions colonists.

Heck, an undefended colony of any size its history when a single lowly frigate shows up packing a couple CSM components.

Still, within the frame of Once Upon the Stars, you can argue that the Colony ship was not up to the standards of the 2400 start date, and thus weaker when struck by a TacNuke.

Or you may say that the TacNuke was an smart bunker-buster with a nuclear warhead.
That one could definitively penetrate a pre-2400 colony ship that its a seating duck on the ground.

Oh yeah, I like the bunker-buster theory.

[Siegebreaker]

Hey, that was a nice surprise.
I was not expecting another update for another month or so.

The question now its, can a tactical nuke really destroy a colonizer?
I don't remember exactly if in the game one single CSM level 1 can blow out of the sky a colony ship.
I will run a test later.

Oh, but also, this story its pre-2400, the starting game date, right?
So that nuke maybe its less capable than a CSM1, and it was a Tactical Nuke, not an ICBM, so it should be even smaller.
Can we assume that a CSM1 its comparable to a current ICBM?

Sorry for picking on this part of the story. Its just that I'm into Sci-fi "realism".
(Like if such a thing as "sci-fi realism" can really exist )

[Atrocities]

You might have a point there. Thanks.

The thing is a nuke is a very devistating weapon. The fact that CSm's have nuclear cores or war heads probibly makes them lower yeild or something. I will say that that the Tacticle nuke used in the Last chapter is significantly much higher yeild than a standard CSM. (Which will be used in later chapters if I ever get around to writing them.)

Thanks for the help on figuring this out.

[Atrocities]

I wonder why no one has read this latest installment. This was so far buried that one needed to pipe air into it to keep it alive.