Bar Trek: The Next Generation. Episode 4: Sore Leave - Page 25

Power Man · #**241** May 16th, 2003, 05:41 PM

Power Man is a bit dazed by the rough Beam Back. He can�t seem to find his way to the bridge. It is all most like this is a different ship !!
He finally makes it back to his post.
He is surprised by what he finds. The controls are all Wrong! The ship speeds are Slow, Mince, Swish, Prance, Skip, and Scurry Away !!
The phaser settings are Warm, Fuzzy, Tickle, Pinch, and Slap !!
�I don�t even want to Think what the settings are for the PEE tube.�

Taking out his Comm unit Power Man calls the Captain. Captain Growltigga something is Not Right here.

I just heard a message from the FCC. (taken by the Comm Oficer who is being played by a PLastic Blow up Man with a silly goatee.) You have been ordered to secure the mining rights from �Those Old Farts� by noon tomorrow. If not you are ordered to �just Tickle them till it hurts.�

I will meet you in your Ready room. I have my phaser Captain. But all I can find around here is Silly Putty and pLastic Wiffel Ball Bats. They only have 6 inch Fake Finger Nails !!

(Sorry folks but I have had a few (Real Life) problems come up and may be only a �supporting character� for this episode. I will try to keep up with the story and chime in when I can. )

narf poit chez BOOM · #**242** May 17th, 2003, 04:03 AM

narf asks kamog about his rats. kamog, being helpfull, tells him about his rats. narf, being nice in thanks for the information, uses knockout gas, since as far as he knows kamog didn't do anything to his rats. he then proceeds down the cooridor, knocking random crewmen into disks. and narf is not a rat. narf sells pet rats. and pinky is a mouse. my cantina avatar is a guy in a blue suit.

Kamog · #**243** May 17th, 2003, 04:25 AM

Going back into Cargo Bay 2, Kamog notices the T-rex still caught in the bay doors. Uh, oh, I can't close the doors now because that would crush the dinosaur. I know, I'll use the transporter to move him into Cargo Bay 1.

Kamog runs to Cargo Bay 1, clears a large area in the center of the room, and hits some buttons on the transporter control panel. The T-rex disappears from Cargo Bay 2... and a bearded Barry appears in Cargo Bay 1. What? What's going on? I'm sure he didn't have a beard a minute ago... oh, well, whatever.

Kamog goes to 10 Forward to have dinner. ...

There's something different about the waitresses today... why do all the Kylie Clone FBW's have goatees now? Ugh!

Taz-in-Space · #**244** May 17th, 2003, 05:21 AM

Posted by Growltigger:

Quote:

Taz, you are the only sensible one on this away team, double check the transporter and let us beam ourselves back to where we belong"

As Taz is about to follow orders he is interrupted by Minger Erax.

Even a Taz has his limits and when M-Erax turns away to sip his hot chocolate; Taz breaks out his trusty gyroscope-equipped titanium-coated baseball bat and whacks M-Erax with it!

Satisfied that M-Erax will be counting stars for some time to come, Taz proceeds to fix the #%&*! transporter.
First that desktop theme has got to go. Taz considers using the bat once again, but settles for resetting the system to win-doze standard...
...Some time later Taz reports to the captain that the transporter is ready to go. (And Taz MORE than ready to go...)

Oh, and I have set remote beam-out for Power Man who reported to your ready room (as ordered) instead of meeting you here!

narf poit chez BOOM · #**245** May 17th, 2003, 06:20 AM

must use better knockout gas next time.

Kamog · #**246** May 17th, 2003, 08:22 AM

In 10 Forward, Kamog sits down and orders a pizza. When the Kylie Clone FBW comes around to his table... "Hmm, that beard can't be real", Kamog thinks to himself. He reaches out and tugs on FBW's goatee. It doesn't come off. The angry FBW spins around and swiftly lands a devastating karate kick on Kamog's stomach, and Kamog is thrown clear across the room, hitting a brick wall (which is there for some reason). Pieces of brick go flying in all directions, and as Kamog crumples to the floor, a nice crater-like imprint is left on the wall.

...The badly bruised Kamog slowly gets up and limps away to sick bay. Ow ow ow, I hope I haven't broken any bones...

Taz-in-Space · #**247** May 19th, 2003, 05:28 AM

...Time in this Minger dimension must be variable. It seems like over two days has gone by since I FIXED THE TRANSPORTER...

[ May 19, 2003, 04:29: Message edited by: Taz-in-Space ]

Raging Deadstar · #**248** May 19th, 2003, 08:10 PM

*Captain Leyasu quickly looks around his attractive crew, stopping at the wepaons officer who he finds extremely attractive. He suddenly snaps out of the trance and watches as the Real Jean Luc Le grand Chat bursts onto the bridge with his crew and begins a full phaser fight. Mnay of the red shirt ensigns take sides with the captain they believe is true. (Well think about it, GT has orange fur! A ginger beard won't show up to well, so it's mainly the short sighted ensigns, though they probably have better aim than your average red shirt)
Leyasu notices the end is coming and Jean Luc le Grand Chat commanding someone to fire the Torpedoes! Leyasu quickly orders the ships to retreat leaving the battle harden woemn upset and the ones who want to live a couple of days more pleased. The five anathema battlecruisers quickly cloak and disappear leaving behind them a couple of mines equipped with giant explosive boxing gloves as a leaving present as they hit warp 5 and bLast off towards the borders of Deadstar space!*

narf poit chez BOOM · #**249** May 19th, 2003, 10:41 PM

narf takes off with his rats.
(narf go by-by. yeah, your making the sensitive christian uncomfortable.)

[ May 19, 2003, 21:56: Message edited by: narf poit chez BOOM ]

Power Man · #**250** May 20th, 2003, 12:13 AM

Power Man is happy to be back on the correct Phong�s Head. (It is the correct one? Right Captain??).
Taking out his phaser he goes �In Search Of � the Pansy power man.
He is found hiding in the WC.

�OH MY!! His suit is a wimpy paisley blue with hot pink stripes. �

Pansy power man cries out: �Don�t hurt me. I want to go home. This ship is Nasty. The controls are wrong, the turbolifts are mean, everyone laughs at my goatee, and I can�t find my way around��

SLAP SLAP The Real Power Man says, �There that shut him/me up. �

The real Power Man bundles the pansy up and takes him to the transporter.
Before Power Man sends him back he tells the pansy, �Your Federation is doomed to End in ruin.
If you wise up and stop being such a pansy you can save yourself and the Federation.
One Man can make a difference. Be That Man!� Get rid of those silly pink stripes.
As he is beamed back the pansy says he will �sleep on it�.

Power Man returns to the Bridge. Captain I have returned the ginger bearded pansy power man to his ship.
Sitting down at the controls Power Man sets the ships phasers to �sweep� and destroys the mine �presents� that were left by the Deadstar ships.

Captain I think I can get the course those ships were on when they cloaked. Our �eagle eye� scanners were still on. They were able to track them as they left.

(By the Way Taz I really like your new avatar.)